My thoughts must have some vent: else heart will break.
My tongue would rust as in my mouth it lies,
If eyes and thoughts were free, and that not speak.
Speak then, and tell the passions of desire;
Which turns mine eyes to floods, my thoughts to fire.
So...this one's going to be a little different than my usual. Also, there will be cursing. I'm reasonably sure that none of it will be mine.
I've been following the work of an online game reviewer named Spoony for some time now. (This is part of why; this was one of the first things I saw from him, and was fascinated--partially because we own the game.)
Spoony has a Twitter account, as do most web reviewers, and he also worked (note the past tense) for Channel Awesome/That Guy With the Glasses, and...yeah. That's where things start to go downhill.
Sometime around the end of May, beginning of June, his personal relationship suffered a fatal blow. I don't know what or why; I know there's been a great deal of mud-slinging on either side, which is, frankly, typical with any breakup. I'm not going to go into exactly what went wrong, when--both because I don't know, and because that's not really the point, here. The main thing to take away from this paragraph: Spoony and his lady broke up. Hijinks ensue.
I know that back on the tenth of June this wandered across my dash:
RT @HopeWithinChaos can you actually miss someone so much it physically hurts? // Quoting Byron helps. A little.Three days later, he'd descended a bit emotionally:
I am filled with self-loathing and a seething disdain for the human race, thanks for asking.and turned to alcohol:
internet petition telling him he should cut his hair:
Why? Because that might make me attractive and appealing to women, and we can't very well have that, fucking can we??He'd also taken to quoting the classics again:
There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy. --Dante AlighieriThen he apologized:
@HopeWithinChaos Sorry, man. I just don't even know what would make me feel better anymore, and that's where I'm really despairing.At this point other people started chiming in (that one, particularly, recommended getting a Lego set to help with mental/emotional pain. Nope, not kidding.) This was his answer:
@Whaddageek @HopeWithinChaos Legos. Legos are going to help me get over the most crushing thing to ever happen to me. Fuck you. Fuck Legos.He was still fairly depressed (understandably):
Need to find some way to pull myself together. Meditation or some zen shit.Which he then immediately discards:
Screw it. Too much effort.Jim Bevan commented on the 15th:
@TheSpoonyOne Noah, if it's that bad, consider seeing someone for therapy.Spoony's reply:
@jbevan70 I went to a therapist. She told me to express my feelings, air it out. Trust me, no good can come of that.Considering what followed, that seemed oddly prescient.
On the 15th (still), another Channel Awesome contributor, Obscurus Lupa, chimed in:
@TheSpoonyOne Seriously, I can't follow you anymore, dude.This, from my perspective, seemed somewhat out of the blue--but at this point I was still skimming and tuning in only occasionally.
Aw, @Obscurus_Lupa hates me now, too. Gonna have to bust out the Adele playlist for this breakup.Lupa responded:
@TheSpoonyOne You joked about chaining Hope up in your basement and raping her. I got no sympathy for you.While I wasn't able to track down that actual tweet, I'm sure that--at least at one point--it existed. Spoony's response?
@Obscurus_Lupa And I apologized to her, because I was out of line.Okay. Seems fair.
But he wasn't even close to done. Go to part II for the continuation.