Saturday, January 19, 2019

somebody calls you, somebody says swim with the current and float away

The history of French fries is fascinating. To start with, they're not even French.

And like old books? How about 11,000 old books from 1923? They have now all been digitized and can be read for free. You're welcome.

And are you part of Collection #1? Before you sneer at the idea, a quick check of haveibeenpwned revealed I am, so I am now sighing and changing my passwords. You should check, too.



In the meantime, I have found the sub ocean! Which is probably only amusing to me, so I'll explain that.



There's a Canadian internet comedy troupe called Loading Ready Run. They do a lot of things, from skit comedy to news coverage to net streaming of games old and new. Every year I watch their charity livestream, Desert Bus for Hope, which is always amazing. But, there's one show, hosted by Graham Stark and featuring Alex Steacy, called Watch+Play.



And in that series of longform torturing of Alex with really bad games, one of the chief marks of a really bad game is that they built the game either in a visible skybox--and some of them are really, really visible--or on the 'ground level' of that landscape, which means any slight glitch, dip, or fall through the ground level results in Alex suddenly visiting the sub ocean--id est, the water layer below the ground.



In other words, Second Life.



I caught these pictures at DISORDERLY/CURELESS' sim, and it was really just a case of my inability to rez in the surroundings as fast as I ordinarily would. I think my comp's going out.

But it amused me.

Sunday, January 13, 2019

and you should realize you are beloved



Welcome to VISIONAIRE Institute's current crop of graduates, with a showing of what they considered was their best work. I am going to link you to the main entry point for the exhibit, which is a charming little country garden, but, because I didn't see much of anything photo-like here, and the gate to the exhibits was closed, I thought it was part of the back wall and left. Thankfully, one of the graduates caught that, and showed me where the real exhibits are.



You want to walk through the gate to find the exhibits. And believe me, if you value digital art in the slightest, you will want to go and peruse.



The bulk of the showing is in a rectangular, slightly overgrown space, with open demi-pavilions made from pale wood ringing the rectangular patch of grasses and rocks.



Don't forget to go back behind the chain-link fence, there's a few more showings there. And keep in mind, these exhibits will be up until Aprille, so there is time, but don't miss it!

The theme for this final showing was "Magic", and I completely get some of the exhibits. Other exhibits, while good, look more like the current round of SL fashion photographers--good, artistic, but...hardly magical. Still, everything is worth seeing, I believe, because whether we like the work or not, each booth shows that person's understanding of the concept. Some of them hit it dead-on. Some of them creep up on it sidewise. Some of them are enthralling, some delighting, at least one disturbing. But it all reflects how they processed that theme.

There are two booths that are empty, which is somewhat sad, and I'm hoping their exhibits were just delayed and they'll be filled in later. Either way, do go look. It is worth the time.

(Also, since today was the graduation, earlier at eight AM, the sim is lagging quite badly. Keep that in mind, though that may ease in a week or so.)

Saturday, January 12, 2019

nowhere near the truth almighty a bunch of nothing said

A short but pithy chat capture. I won't say which group, precisely, this is from, but it is for a maker of skins, and quite nice ones. Someone fails to get the point of true artistry:
[22:55] zxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: have u guys seen the movie ready player one??
Unfortunately. I hated it. Why?
[22:55] zxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: can u make a skin like that??
[22:55] Emilly Orr: Like...which skin??
Because that film? That film is packed with looks for virtual avatars, by design, so..."a skin" won't really cover it.
[22:56] zxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: the um/// avatars the blue guy and the red chikc on the movie "ready player one"
You mean Parzival and Art3mis, of course. And it's "chick".
[22:57] Emilly Orr: So...grab a Kemono avatar, the Venus M3 head, some anime eyes, a reasonably-approximate skin mod, and some Ayashi short hair, there's the girl.
I'm doing my best to track down things after the fact, a skin mod that might work is this, but the facial tats are pretty much going to have to be custom.

Also, I was pretty sure at the time Ayashi would be the best bet, but that specific backswept Mohawk they seem to have not. CaTwA, however, seems to have one.
[23:00] Emilly Orr: For the boy, almost the same thing--Kemono avatar, anime eyes, the M4 Mars head, different anime hair and boy chest mod to make the chest flat.
After the fact, again, I realized Krankhaus' Kuroo avatar would work better, and in that case, ditch the chest mod.

But pretty much, right? I mean, this took all of ten minutes to stare at pictures of both of them and track down approximates. They won't be perfect, but on the other hand, this particular skinmaker does not design for Kemono (or Kuroo, for that matter), so it wouldn't help if he wanted that type of very anime look anyway.

And ultimately, again, why? Because that's pretty much asking someone to infringe copyright on purpose. No thank you. No one's interested who has ethics at all, and those who would be interested, because they are immoral weasels, want a high amount of cash for their trouble. Why bother?
[23:01] zxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: can I live in your belly button?
[23:01] zxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: im bored lol
No. Also gross. Also go away, kid, find something else to do. The adults are busy.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

I tried to teach you solitaire, you just hollered at the moon (part two)

(Continued from yesterday's entry.)

[11:43] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I've complained enough.
[11:44] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I'm sure not everyone is pleased with me
[11:44] Emilly Orr: It's just baffling. She keeps doing this.
[11:44] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She's out of excuses...
[11:45] Emilly Orr: Do you give her another chance, is the question.
[11:45] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: That is exactly the question
[11:45] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: If she's replaced all of her stuff will be returned
[11:46] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She definitely cannot pay any rent that will cover a sim sized platform
[11:47] Emilly Orr: True. Also ouch, that's right, she's basically "renting" a skybound sim.
She'd asked [Txxx] to give her a 'learning center' space, that she wanted to look "natural" to the area, so...in talks on what she wanted, they decided on the sim-size platform over the entire ground-level sim. So on that platform, there are trees, hills, foliage--all now in winter with added piles of snow--and buildings. Buildings which, in my estimation, have been used exactly once for one class. Yule was a failure, two of the three classes following--four, if you count this one--are dead on arrival, so...what is the point of the additional sim and prim space reserved for her use?
[11:47] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Both of them have been given an opportunity to contribute to Thorvaldshavn and failed
[11:48] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: That's right
[11:48] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: there's a couple of thousand linden in that, per week
[11:48] Emilly Orr: At least.
And that's daunting in itself, innit? I mean, by no means am I rich; I wouldn't have lost my Caledon parcel by not dancing for tips for two months if I was even up to lower middle-class in income. But sim owners cannot be supposed to be rich, either, and even if they are, even if they can afford to own seventeen sims (and most can't), they still will not ever be comfortable tossing thousands of prims to someone without something in return. Friendship, help on the sim, rent, whatever--something, or it's an entirely one-sided transaction.

Right now [Ixxx] is a one-sided transaction.
[11:49] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: They both were allowed to live here rent free because they were contributing to our group and sim.
[11:50] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: And neither has fulfilled their part. Or am I wrong?
I don't think he's wrong.
[11:51] Emilly Orr: This is such a mess. How is she a member of a Norse faith and not learned the values of responsibility, standing behind her words, at the very least?
[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: No idea...
[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: is her disease part of her problem?
There are RL issues I won't go into, but she is affected by them.
[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Am I being self-absorbed and petty?
[11:53] Emilly Orr: I can't imagine how unless it affects her memory and impulse control.
And if so, if that is the case--and I am not saying it is--shouldn't she mention that to people who are relying on her? Not the breakdown of specifics, no one is "owed" that, but just a general--"I may have problems doing [X]?
[11:54] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She saw the comment about her attention span and she had to IM me, saying she was gnat-brained
[11:54] Emilly Orr: Yeah, but that's an excuse at this point.
[11:54] Emilly Orr: She flips it out as if it's supposed to protect her.
[11:54] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I said, "no your not... your attention span is short."
[11:55] Emilly Orr: It's like Yule, all her hand-wringing over "Freyr is mad at me". Yeah, great, then fix it. How would he want you to repair this? And she ignored both of us, and just kept hand-wringing.
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I told her straight up. She needs to learn how to manage and stay on things
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Yes.. exactly
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I think she's done
[11:56] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I really don't need this
[11:56] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I've already raised two kids.. I'm not doing another who's a manipulator.
For me, the question is why she's a manipulator. Not that she is one, and sure, that kind of thing can start in childhood, I get that--but I mean, in SL. How has she spent ten years on the grid and expected other people to just cover for her like this? She doesn't move her own prims, she expects other people to do that. She asks for things she can't afford and expects them just to be given to her. She starts events two hours late, IF she starts them at all, and she expects everyone to fawningly accept this level of mistreatment. So who the hell was covering for her over the last ten years of SL? Because whoever they were, they're not here now. And we're not interested in being her fetch-and-carry servants.
[11:56] Emilly Orr: Aiii. So you already deal with this, yeah.
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx nods
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: they both turned out well
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: they aren't jailbirds and are sober
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: and have good jobs
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I did what I was supposed to do
[11:57] Emilly Orr: You have.
For me, that's the mark of a good parent. Did he and his kids always get along? Probably not, growing up is hard, emotions run high, arguments are bound to happen. But he got them to adulthood, neither died, neither are addicted to horrible things, neither went to jail. That's indicative of a success rate, to me.
[11:59] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: No wonder Birka failed.
[11:59] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: with those two in charge
[11:59] Emilly Orr: They're both so bad at this.
They really are. And even worse--[Vxxxxxx], who left the sim entirely to go chase Gorean slave girls, as a slaver, left nearly 5000 prims rezzed out on the sim. Inge, with her 'learning center' sky platform, has 1,500. This is a full-size sim now, not a homestead, but that's still more than 6,500 prims that they're using--and for what? [Vxxxxxx] is never there, and has unfriended all of us (though he hasn't left the group), and [Ixxx] is just...useless in every way. So why are we still hosting their things if they aren't working for the sim?


Comparison: I'm not there a lot. I admit that. I have an active SL, an active RL, I'm not there as much as I want to be. But I have less than 100 prims rezzed out. My house--which I pay rent for!--is the smallest I could talk [Txxx] into giving me. I am very much aware that I could have more if I asked, because I do make the council meetings, and take my position as advisor seriously.

But I don't abuse that. I am happy with my 100 prims. I may at some point ask [Txxx] for a slightly larger house, but two rooms maximum, not a palatial hall. Or a one-room with a partial loft. I do not want or need more than that.

So why do they need 6500 prims? Neither of them showed up to the last two council meetings, and [Vxxxxxx] in specific hasn't shown up to the past three. [Ixxx] can't seem to throw a ritual, or a class on lore, to save her life, and she's supposed to be this huge expert on all things Norse. So what gives?

Wednesday, January 9, 2019

I tried to teach you solitaire, you just hollered at the moon (part one)

Anyone feel like a trip through negative nostalgia? I was on the grid for all but the first controversy. And many of them got very, very dire indeed, on the ground, living them out.

Kind of continuing the negative trend...today's Scenes from a Chat, all about irresponsibility.
[11:17] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Hi Em
[11:17] Emilly Orr: Hello there!
[11:18] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: How's things?
[11:19] Emilly Orr: Going well so far. Quiet.
[11:21] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Well [Ixxx] claims she's having cramps but she's got notes for the Lore and Life event
Now, this is not the irresponsible bit. I well know how daunting it can be to try to concentrate when part of my anatomy is trying to turn itself inside out. It's perfectly valid to say, sorry, migraine, can't, sorry, cramps, can't, sorry, RL has exploded, can't.
[11:21] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She didn't send out notices...
[11:22] Emilly Orr: ....
[11:22] Emilly Orr: When's the event happening?
This is our problem with this particular individual. She doesn't send out notices in advance. She doesn't start on time when she DOES send out notices. Hells, for the Yule event--which she had said she wanted to run--she ended up starting two hours and TWO ENTIRE DAYS late! That's not just scatterbrained, that's personally insulting to everyone who wanted to attend.
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She asked if you could take it.
[11:22] Emilly Orr: She asked if...IS SHE SERIOUS
[11:22] Emilly Orr: No.
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I'm going to tell her now
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: NO
[11:22] Emilly Orr: Let me correct that.
[11:22] Emilly Orr: I will take it if you ask me to.
And I would. For [Txxx]'s sake, I would try to run with this, pull up some articles, parse them before I had to be 'onstage', as t'were, and run this. I trust him that much.
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: the event is today in a few minutes
[11:22] Emilly Orr: But SHE is responsible, and SHE needs to realize that her lack of preparation has consequences.
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: You are busy
[11:22] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: and I'm not qualified
[11:23] Emilly Orr: Sure, because I had no notice of an event! I could easily have been occupied with any of a dozen other things.
That's not me being flippant. There could have been folks at Sakura that I needed to meet with. That's happened in this time slot in the past. I could have been spending time with my dominant, who, when he has time, likes me there. I could have been engaged in building something, prepping items for sale, and didn't feel I could break off to attend a class.
[11:23] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I know that well
[11:24] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She's going to eat this too
[11:26] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I'm thinking we'll need another priestess..
[11:26] Emilly Orr nods.
[11:26] Emilly Orr: If she doesn't shape up.
[11:26] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She waited until the last moment
[11:28] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: 11 AM is start time
This is another thing. You have an event, you advertise it. If it really is spontaneous and no warning was given US to advertise it, we still try, by and large, to give as much advance warning as possible. Half an hour at the LEAST. Now, most of us who are comfortable with listing events, will follow up at fifteen, and at the start, and then at least halfway through...but if we have notice of when this is going to be, we'll try to list it a day early, a week early, whatever we feel we need to.
[11:29] Emilly Orr: Now, maybe it's just me, but....I generally have more warning in terms of feminine discomfort? Like, things ache for a bit, and then it gets hard, it's never just....normal then boom, if that makes sense?
[11:30] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I was married to a PMS Queen for 30 years...
[11:30] Emilly Orr: Okay then.
So yeah, he definitely understands.
[11:30] Emilly Orr: Well, PMS is slightly different, though the girls know to toss me B and C vitamins if I start getting snappish. :D
[11:31] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I knew nearly a week in advance
[11:31] Emilly Orr: And yet. She still waited until...well. Now.
When she should have had ample warning of both when the classes start, since SHE sets them up, AND when her courses started and the expected levels of pain. Come on now. Even me, with my hugely erratic system--once I do start, I know what I'm in for. How can she forget something like that? Both of those things, the class time too?
[11:31] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: and when she went into menopause I really knew it
[11:31] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: so.. this is crap
[11:32] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Why or why do women seem to think men are idiots?
[11:32] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: oh why?
[11:33] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I'll hush... I'm sorry
[11:34] Emilly Orr: No, you're not wrong. Not all of us do, but it is a prevailing trend.
[11:35] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: It's really insulting
[11:35] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: It's Misandry
It is, actually. It's very dismissive of an entire gender. Just as we complain about misogyny towards women, men do have a right to complain about using menstruation as an excuse to men. (Not actually having, and explaining; that's different, and again, if she's genuinely suffering, I get that. But.)
[11:37] Emilly Orr: I think most of us were raised that men dislike mention of menstruation, and a lot of men do, but not all of them. So women--some women--use that as a handy excuse. "I can't do [whatever], sorry, cramps."
[11:37] Emilly Orr: I'm not saying she is, just saying it's been done.
[11:38] Emilly Orr: And the expected response is "Ew, oh gods, okay, whatever, do what you need to, just don't tell me about it".
[11:38] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I know it well
[11:39] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Menstruation never put me off.. it's a fact of life.
I was sent a copy of her "notes" for the event, by [Txxx]. Even her notes would need heavy explanation to be used by another teacher:
Lay of Sigdrifa -- immediate segue from Lay of Fafnir (poem about Sigurd the Volsung killing Fafnir the dragon)...
begins with S. riding to Hindfell (unknown mtn in Frankish territory) to find Brynhild
* Brynhild = Sigdrifa? YES; Sigdrifa ('inciter to victory') a generic description of Valkyries, mistaken for proper name
* if Valkyries choose who _dies_ in a fight, they also choose who survives and wins
* (Brynhild kicked out of Asgard for supporting the wrong side -- Odin had promised to let other guy win [*loss of honor*])
* If Odin loses honor, he passes that loss on to Brynhild: no more exemption from marriage, female norms traditional *at the time*
(NO, this does not mean all modern Heathen women should stay out of the military and get married; it means women should keep their word as much as men.
She's the equivalent of a dishonorably discharged vet busted for insubordination.)

Brynhild still keeps some agency, allowed to marry fearless man

"Sleeping Beauty" parallels?

* Loss of innocence from tempting fate
* Magical stasis thru pricking (spindle vs. thorn), woman set up for future pricking (Freudian) by Mr. Right

Romanticized Valkyrie imagery?

* Yes; older Norse poems depict them as frightening, shrieking, wolf-riding hags
* Valkyries in Odin's service aren't sexual, or marriage wouldn't be punishment
* Do any serve Freyja? Strictly UPG, but Freyja needs help gathering "her" half -- what qualifications?
If I was completely familiar with the story, I could have flown with this. If. But since I'm not completely facile with this, just have the "I have read this" comprehension level, I would not feel comfortable addressing these points in a class.
[11:40] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Anyway, she did a nice job on her notes, but no notice? ...
[11:40] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: not one... I checked the groups.
He sent me the second part of her "notes":
-- only poem in the Eddas with the following:

* spoken prayer (Brynhild's "Hail to Day")
* magical techniques described in detail (where to carve what, materials used)
* individual runes named as part of spells (but archaeological evidence, other poems show that spells were not just isolated letters carved/named)
* ale-runes (protection from poison/magically spiked drinks) *may* support alternate rune name (leek/laukaz = laguz, not the actual plant here)

-- Brynhild's magical lessons a fragmented list, not in order; probably not from same poem

-- list of 24 magical things ("where runes are carved"): link to Elder Futhark is modern UPG, no order or pattern

-- slight Christian influence in ref to coffin burial (this and romanticized Valkyrie are "red flags" for late origin

-- life lessons: (1) pop-culture images of magic and the supernatural...not historically accurate
(2) lore itself recorded in conversion era; learn to spot non-Heathen elements, but don't throw whole thing out
Strangely, the second part of the notes is more cohesive, but I'd still have to dig up my copy of the Poetic Eddas and read through it, maybe Google for some things (granted, a five-minute search gave me every lore-related link here, but I didn't read through everything comprehensively; I'd want to do that to have familiarity for any questions asked by the class).

(Continued in part two, tomorrow.)

Tuesday, January 8, 2019

win Astrology's entire store?

People, this one is interesting. But it's not just a giveaway, it's a mystery. Like, to start with, I can't tweet my tracking link for the contest. Why? Because Astrology's Twitter account has been banned. Why? No clue. Not entirely sure what they could have done that was so bad, because Astrology is just the hair brand that followed Alice Project. I really don't know.

So what is it? Well, here's how the entry starts:
Invite your friends, win 5 fat packs... OR THE ENTIRE STORE
December 15, 2018 by Alice
Am I crazy? Yes! Am I crazy for doing this? Probably!

But it’s done. I’ve set it up. I’m typing it. It’s happening.

Astrology is having a...

Referral contest giveaway! For the entire store!!!

You could win up to 21 currently available fat packs + 3 new fat packs of your choice. I’ll probably have a couple new releases between now and January 15th, so you’ll get those too.
So...that's the offer. I don't know if she wants people to join the group--I think right now it's still free join--but:
How it works

You sign up for the contest right here and share the link provided to you. From December 15th to January 15th you can campaign to refer people to the contest. Every time someone signs up through your link, you get a point.

The 3 people who refer the MOST people to the contest are guaranteed a prize and a chance at winning THE ENTIRE STORE. Everyone else has a chance to be one of 5 people who will each win 1 fat pack.
There will be 8 total winners once the whole thing is finished.
So, do I expect to win this thing, with no access to their Twitter account now, and no Facebook to link to? No, not really. Do I like the brand enough to give them an entire blog post? Oh, yes, yes I do. Before I found Truth I lived almost exclusively in Alice Project hair, and I am slowly building up a treasure trove of the new stuff.



This is London, the small version. Usually L sizes are default for the busty, but in this case, L just gave me Tammy Wynette hair.

I love how this is a style I can wear casually, or at work--it's appropriate for both adventuring around the grid and dancing in fancy frocks.



This is Sabiana, a style that doesn't have large/small variants, but doesn't seem to need them. It's a bit more windswept, but still flexible for a bunch of settings.



And this is Horror, so named because it originally came out during October in a bloody version, I believe. I'm going to have to pull this one into edit and see if I can fix the alpha blending, and it does clip a bit into the chest, I'll have to see if that's just this pose, or if it's persistent. But for long, loose, breezy hairstyles, I love it.

I'd show off more, but seriously, that's all I have so far--all my other (many!) styles from the creator are from her former hair store, Alice Project. Many of which are still wearable today, which is neat. (Though to be fair, nearly all of them were acquired for Hallows (blood-spattered) or holiday (with candy-cane stripes, red/green stripes, or blue/ice stripes) use.

But yes--contest or no contest, I like Astrology. If she ever makes a ponytail style that has a styling hud that can change to long hair, I am hers for life. (Right now I have a ponytail from Truth that's the daily-wear option, and several loose-hair styles to switch to if needed from many makers.) Go, peruse what she has up now, know she's slowly converting the Alice Project styles to new mesh Astrology styles, and keep in mind she's a part of at least two sales events, Fifty Linden Fridays and SL Syndicate Sundays, so there are even changes to get specialty colors of her hair on discount!

Saturday, January 5, 2019

I guess it doesn't matter any way

There are some days where being human is enough to make my skin crawl. This was one of those days. I tried to stay in human guise, but in the end, after the events of the day, I had to crawl out of it, I had to get into someone else, something else. I could not stand, not for one more moment, being...human.



This is what we know: [deleted by request], is gone.

[Statement following deleted by request].



Two days ago, [a terrible thing happened]. I cannot further go into it, as I have been asked to remove this content.



The fae lands do not soothe, today. Not even snow soothes, today. Because the horror wasn't over, isn't over. Today...today. Today [deleted by request is] gone.

[picture removed by request]

She's not gone for anyone who had her as a friend. I can still pull up her profile, her partner can, her other friends can...[all other details given removed by request.]

[picture removed by request]

[Paragraph removed by request].

[picture removed by request]

And now, even going home is no comfort, because, since I gave up my Caledon parcel, my home is their home. And how long will it exist? Do I need to scramble to find another place to rent? Will we ever hear from her again? Will we ever know why any of this happened?



This is what we know: that [deleted by request] is gone. And it may be all we ever know. This loss is chilling, and untenable, and...we must endure anyway, because there is nothing else we can do.

[The individual in question has responded. I have deleted the response but, because I put a great deal of effort into these pictures, I am leaving the post up; simply all personal details have been removed. I...am again rocked by her response, but it is her response, as far as I have any way of knowing, and I must honor it. She willingly left.]

[I also apologize to the reader that responded in comments; because her comment mentioned the former avatar's name, and my response may have given further information identifying that person, those comments have also been deleted.]

Sunday, December 30, 2018

they've been saying that for ages, so will you answer this

We start off with a bug of non-historic nature:
[11:26] Mxxxxx Rxxxxxx: Hello, sometimes, when I tp, part of my clothes of drew gacha detach grom myself, has that happened to anyone else?
[11:26] Kxxxxxx Lxxxxxxx: its been happening for at least a month toeveryone :)
[11:27] Bxxxxxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx stuffs [Mxxxx'] top in behind the sofa
[11:27] Mxxxxx Rxxxxxx: lol
[11:27] sxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: i found a trick around it
[11:27] sxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: put the outfit together log out n back in and it wont pop off
Does this really work? Because when I crash and come back, after getting dressed, sometimes things still change; hair, outfit, shoes, sometimes I find I'm wearing two pairs of shoes...
[11:27] txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: yeah it's a new feature, my entire body came off yesterday when i wasn't touching anything
[11:28] Emilly Orr: The new trick that's killing my brain is I'll port somewhere, and part of what I'm wearing--including not just attachments, but body parts and HUDs--end up in Lost and Found
This one, I swear, I'm losing brain cells trying to figure this one out. Sometimes the parts are cloned and stuck in Lost and Found; sometimes they are physically removed and stuck there, and I have to track them down, gut them out, and put them on again. And the parts that go missing make NO sense: a body chain that's in a daily wear folder; the HUD that controls my Maitreya body (but not the body itself); the feet that go with my body (but not the body itself); the HUD I wear to keep track of visitors on the sim...It's just scattershot and baffling.
[11:28] txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: :O lost and found? Ok i better have a look there just in case
[11:29] Emilly Orr: It may only be me, but I thought I'd point it out
[11:30] txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: worth checking! Nothing there for me but i'll know where to look now just in case :D
[11:30] Bxxxxxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx: i've had that happen a few times
[11:30] Exxx Fxxxxxxx: ive seen its a current bug
[11:31] Emilly Orr: Yeah--they finally invented a NEW bug, not brought back a vintage one!
[11:32] Bxxxxxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx: new for 2019
[11:32] Exxx Fxxxxxxx: well you all complained about your hair attaching to your ass...so now it just disappears altogether
Well, that's "Be careful what you ask for" in spades, innit?
[11:32] sxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: lol evie
[11:33] Exxx Fxxxxxxx: and at least they dont have to wind the motor up again every tuesday now
[11:34] Bxxxxxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx: thats because they have genetically modified hamsters now, they run on lag
[11:34] Exxx Fxxxxxxx: can I buy one on MP...ive lots of feed for them
Much time passed, I went off for the finding of foods, only to see this when I returned:
[11:56] oxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: hxxp://mxxxxxxxxxesexsualgilft.altervista.org
I mean, I'm sure you can guess what I took out to make it not work as a link, but I did want you to see the rest of it, especially the "sexsual" ( *gags* ) and the "gilft" (because WTF is a "gilft"??). Here's the rest of it:
Group for Gift - Group Gift Mesh Body -omega - sex -hard Only free Gift.Cottage Gift Shop nows make some custom items such as cards and flowers. wall hangers, Baby hangers, Gift Boxes, hxxp://mxxxxxxxxxesexsualgilft.altervista.org [11:56] mxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: do not click.. spam 
Obviously spam, and bad spam at that.
[11:57] Bxxxxxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx: taken care of
By that she means that she, as a group mod, bounced the clueless wonder. Four years old, btw. Usually it's the ten-year accounts that haven't logged in in a while that get nabbed, so the only thing I can think of was she was stupid enough to click one of these scam links and got her account hacked directly.
[11:58] Jxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Judas Priest, I thought we saw the last of these kind of scams 2 years ago
Oh, no, they're everywhere still.
[11:59] txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: oh they'll never end :(
[12:18] Emilly Orr: "Gilft"? Their spelling's getting worse.
It really is. Not that they care, overall...obviously, people are still falling for this inanity, enough to make them money at least. There have to be easier ways to make a buck, people, seriously.

Saturday, December 29, 2018

it’s all you all the time, you’re selfish

This was so far beyond my usual oddity, I have to post about it.

So, just as a brief explanation: I watch a lot of skeptic channels on YouTube. This is not news. Rachel Oates runs one of those channels. This is probably not news either, as she's smart, articulate, funny, and while I don't always agree with her, either way she's engaging and makes me think.

She put out "Sorry I screwed up", which was her reacting to comments she'd received on her last MGTOW video. (For anyone who doesn't know, "MGTOW" stands for "Men Going Their Own Way", and my opinion on the movement will become clear fairly soon, so I'm not going to go into it further than that.)

Her description below the video says:
The video's definitely more serious than the thumbnail makes out... but you know me! I just thought some of this stuff was worth saying. I know all the MGTOW guys who just want to be angry probably aren't going to care, they'll just call me a slut and insult my face / voice / life some more, but hopefully my actual subscribers will actually get something out of this and it'll explain a few things and we can all move on and keep being happy :)
And, I admit, as I was in something of a ranting mood, I responded:
Emilly Orr
1 week ago

I realize you want to keep it purely about the wording of the posts, not directly attack individual people, but I will gladly state that personally: the MGTOW community is full of toxic hatred and knee-jerk loathing for anyone who's not their own gender. There is no value, for them, in being anything but male, so how dare you be articulate, educated, funny, focused AND be female? The audacity. Keep your chin up and realize it's their own deep-seated insecurity in their own world view, and nothing at all you've done, that garners their hate and their lashing out.
No, this was in no way polite. I admit that. It was inflammatory, and intended to be so, I also acknowledge that. And...are we surprised? Someone answered:
Ruach Hako'desh
1 week ago

Do we need to arrest you women and put you to death for war crimes, before you get it? WE ARE TIRED OF LIVING UNDER YOUR GENOCIDE. Genocide shares characteristics with both war crimes and crimes against humanity, but is considered the most egregious crime of all. The legal definition of Genocide; Killing members of the group;causing serious bodily or mental harm to members of the group;deliberately inflicting on the group conditions of life, calculated to bring about its physical destruction in whole or in part; imposing measures intended to prevent births within the group; [and] forcibly transferring children of the group to another group.
Uses law, customs, and political power to deny the rights of male group, legitimizes there victimization, denies there humanity. Males of it are equated with animals, vermin, insects or diseases. The Female group is taught to regard the other group as less than human, and even alien to their society. Have categories to distinguish people into “us and them”. Indoctrinated to believe that “We are better off without them.” Inflammatory rhetoric and hate propaganda with the objective of creating fear of the other group. Normaizing such genocide and the Normalization of Terror. The male group there property is often expropriated, they are even segregated. They are deliberately deprived of resources in order to slowly destroy them. Programs are implemented to prevent procreation, Children are forcibly taken. Psychological Torture, infliction of mental suffering, Debilitation, Isolation, solitary or quasi-solitary confinement, Degradation, deprivations, threats of death or violence, to self or others.

Crime of creating hostile environment, creating the threat of harm against the peace of this community, intentional tort. In terrorem, In order to frighten, contra legem, Against the law. The conduct “political warfare,” including what is termed the “three warfares”: public opinion warfare, legal warfare, and psychological warfare, involve operational missions against psychology and cognitive capacities. Taking of hostages, torture, crime of Apartheid as inhumane acts of a character similar to other crimes against humanity. The use of collective punishments, alongside hostage-taking and belligerent reprisals, has for many years been resorted to as a means of repression or intimidation. Torture per se and, in particular, psychological methods with imposing, deprivations of liberty, including attempted starvation, attempted forced homelessness, and economical deprivations as a method of warfare.

Placing superiority with oppression and unjustly punishing or degrading and humiliating. Confinement and prolonged deprivations amount to inhuman or degrading treatment or torture, when applied in conjunction with other techniques, cumulatively and/or over a long time. Systematic Terror; Social Dominance, violence and threat of violence or intimidation. Maintaining Oppression; The Superior Power of the Oppressors, the power to control, dominate, or exploit the persons. With the self-fulfilling prophecies in which the behavior of the oppressed, resulting from their oppression are used by the oppressors to justify the oppression; and the distorted relation between the oppressors and the oppressed. Substantial, severe, intense, extreme, unbearable, intolerable, excruciating, agonizing. Psychological Torture, infliction of mental suffering, Prolonged mental harm’ and abuse, of substantial duration. Debilitation, Isolation, solitary or quasi-solitary confinement, Degradation, deprivations, threats of death or violence, to self or others. Severely abused, egregious torment, emasculated, tamped down, basic human rights systematically abused through extrajudicial killings, torture and forced displacement or homelessness.
Do note: beyond bolding things that are all caps, I have done zero editing of his tirade. And while I expected an answer of some kind, I did not in any wise expect paragraphs of screaming insanity.

He wasn't done, though:
Ruach Hako'desh
1 week ago

Torture is a catastrophic existential event, facing the double dilemma both of coming to terms with the full reality of torture also of surviving unchanged the insidious pressure of YOU THE TORTURER to change, to act or react in relation to YOUR wishes. Coercive control designed to subjugate through, humiliation, guilt, coercion, or manipulation, and so forth.Thus qualify as torture, YOUR use of various forms of humiliation, degrading treatment, threats, isolation, or with the aim of punishing, degrading and humiliating. YOUR deliberate application which suits you the torturers and which is intended to have the maximum impact on the victims makes it much more difficult for the victims to mount any satisfactory defense, this is certain to be one of the primary aims of Your regime. It seems that torture is used for a combination of reasons, but chief among these are punishment and systematic repression. Torture and inhuman and degrading treatment do not involve merely one horrific act, but rather a regime that is unconscionably cruel in its totality. Attaching a ‘‘special stigma’’ and ‘‘particular intensity and cruelty’’, oppression: prolonged cruel and unjust treatment, persecution, abuse, maltreatment, ill-treatment, tyranny, despotism, and repression.

Makes declaratory judgment citing such respondents as "war criminals," particular belligerents to a conflict, hostile and aggressive, hostis humani generis. Engaged in abuse, torture, starvation, imprisonment, threats, psychological abuse, and coercion. Unethical repression, prolonged, cruel and unjust maltreatment. Actions define criminal intent the mental element, or mens rea of mass murder, as malice aforethought, and the interpretations of malice, maliciously, willfully. Atrocities, inhumane acts constitute grave infringements on the circumstances. Suffering appalling abuse as part of collective punishments. Not merely been the victim of injury and threat of death, but has also received the focused attention of adversaries determined to cause the maximal psychological harm. Attempts to reach resolution has been received with retaliation and intimidation acts, due to sloth, inattention or desire to seize tactical advantage, dilatory practices, ultimately disrespect for the law. The ongoing set of schemes to punish, coerce, and intimidate to suppress any dissent or objection to the "frightening" experience, an invasion of considerable proportion disruption and threat of life. Oppression, has been Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury.

Dominance, systematic terror can be official, semi-official, violence or intimidation carried out by officials of the state but not legally sanctioned by the state while terror is perpetrated by private individuals from dominant group, often illegally upon the subordinate. Stereotypes are attitudes, beliefs, feeling s and assumptions about a target group that are widespread and socially sanctioned. Stereotypes support the maintenance of institutionalized oppression by seemingly validating misinformation or beliefs. The repeated, everyday experience of being treated as an inferior produces a public image of being an inferior, the socially dominant oppression they produce and perpetuate. If oppressive consequences accrue to institutional laws, customs, or practices, the institution is oppressive whether or not the individuals maintaining those practices have oppressive intentions. 'Oppression is a matter of result regardless of intent.

Ongoing cycles of abuse and a climate of fear to normalize, legitimize, rationalize, deny, or minimize the abusive behaviour, and blame the victim for it. Do not question, do not have a differing opinion, do not have an individual thought or desire. The purpose of gas-lighting is to destroy or to deprive sanity. Insult the victim’s sense of security, uncanny how many gas-lighters have psychic abilities–they profess to be able to read minds through their assertions. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, it attempts to destabilize the target and delegitimize the target's belief with the intention of disorienting the victim, or techniques of character assassination to maintain an agenda, which prevents both trying to escape, and moving forward in psychological recovery. Emotional abuse include name-calling, playing mind games, putting the victim down, or humiliating the individual. The goals are to make the person feel bad about themselves, feel guilty or think that they are crazy. Subjugation of the will of the victims to that of the torturers be it an aspect of interrogation, an aspect of punishment, retaliation, coercion and of political or religious repression. Torture per se and, in particular, psychological methods used during detention, with the aim of punishing or degrading and humiliating the victim. Suffering persistent abuse, resulting in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, post-traumatic stress disorder. Including disrupting the normal healing process and leave the survivor condemned to a life of misery. A form of "bondage" through which the torturers ensure there torture will persist. Psychological trauma include harassment, embarrassment, abuse, discrimination, police brutality, bullying, domestic violence, and so on.
Again, outside of bolding all caps bits, I have changed nothing.

And he still wasn't done:
Ruach Hako'desh
1 week ago

Crime against humanity of apartheid. Committing an inhumane act against one or more persons in the context of an institutionalized regime of systematic oppression and domination by one group over any other group or groups. Crime against humanity of other inhumane acts. Inflicting great suffering or serious injury to the mental health by means of an inhumane acts. Crime against humanity of enslavement. Exercising the power attaching to the right of ownership over one or more persons or imposing similar deprivations of liberty. Crime against humanity of imprisonment or other severe deprivation of liberty. War crime of starvation as a method of warfare. Depriving civilian of objects indispensable to their survival intending to starve them as a method of warfare. War crime of cruel treatment. War crime of inhuman treatment. War crime of torture. War crime of outrages upon personal dignity. Humiliating, degrading, or otherwise violating the dignity to a degree generally recognized as an outrage. War crime of willfully causing great suffering. War crime of destruction and appropriation of property. War crime of unlawful confinement. War crime of improper use of a flag of truce. War crime of using, conscripting or enlisting children. War crime of cruel treatment. War crime of attacking protected objects. War crime of treacherously killing or wounding. War crime of denying quarter. Genocide by causing serious bodily or mental harm, inflicting conditions of life calculated to bring about physical destruction. Genocide by imposing measures intended to prevent births. Genocide by forcibly transferring children. IT GOES ON AND ON AND ON....
I answered back, of course:
Emilly Orr
4 days ago

@Ruach Hako'desh Not dating you is not genocide. Full stop.
Of course, he had to rant back:
Ruach Hako'desh
4 days ago

@Emilly Orr Considering during 2010–2014, an estimated 56 million + induced abortions each year worldwide. How many people died in ww2, 60 million people. It is like a holocaust every year. This is what you are saying. "We are to irresponsible and/or mentally incompetent to have children therefore we need to abort them." That Children should be raised by the state, conceived, developed, and engineered in state-owned breeding centers. So no more rights, just slaves owned and produced by and for the state, all because of your Genocidal child murder, continued to be practiced and continue to be embraced today. If they have a right to choose so should the men! The laws of equity demand that women stop having abortions or they release men from the enslavement of forced child care. Yet, you murder men refusing to allow them control over there own body being forced to care for a child for 18+ years. At gunpoint your father's are severely abused, egregious torment, emasculated, tamped down,basic human rights systematically abused through extrajudicial killings, torture and forced displacement or homelessness. That results in a 'deliberate deaths' and serves as 'a form of Murder' or 'manslaughter' as 'executions' the 'unlawful killing of another human without justification'. Despising the work of your hands and favor the designs of the wicked, to trust in oppression, in extortion, and put vain hopes in stolen goods. Eating the fruit of iniquity while devouring the earth; favoring the designs of the wicked, trusting in oppression, in extortion, and putting vain hopes in stolen goods. Because of the uncleanness that brings on destruction. By lying, stealing, and committing adultery. Demonizing men, destroying and then ridiculing them. Your honorable men are famished.
If he's talking "honorable men" in MGTOW, I have yet to see them, but okay, sure. For the rest of it...I'm just baffled. But he wasn't done, again, and went on:
Ruach Hako'desh
4 days ago

@Emilly Orr Denying emotional responsiveness" as characteristic of emotional abuse, treated has "stupid and ignorant" subhuman, ranging from disinterest, criticism, prejudice, avoidance, rejection, betrayal, stigmatization, ostracism, abandonment. It is repugnant, egregious, atrocious, heinous, and "subtle and insidious" form of abuse and emotional torture, "frequent and regular" damage to the emotional psyche. Routinely is subjected patterns of abuse is who's emotional suffering and psychological condition is best described has “Battered.” is a form of manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, hoping to make them question their own memory, perception, and sanity. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, it attempts to destabilize the target and delegitimize the target's belief with the intention of disorienting the victim, or techniques of character assassination to maintain an agenda, which prevents both trying to escape, and moving forward in psychological recovery.
So...he does think not dating him is inflicting terroristic abuse and genocide? What?

My reply:
Emilly Orr
3 days ago

@Ruach Hako'desh I'd say listen to what I'm actually saying, not what endless programming missives on MGTOW/incel forums have given you, but since you seem incapable of that, I will simply repeat: Not dating you is not genocide. Not all women abort, and if you think it's so harmful to the species, why aren't you crusading for more orphan adoptions, better social support and education for young, scared mothers to be? Instead of ranting pointlessly about how all women are terrorists and murderers who should be slain for 'war crimes'. (I'd ask what war, but you'd just parrot another programmed, meaningless answer, so I won't.)
I should have known better. His response:
Ruach Hako'desh
3 days ago

@Emilly Orr I DO NOT CARE STOP TELLING MEN WHAT TO DO. GO DATE YOURSELF! I DO NOT CARE, STOP MAKING THIS ABOUT HOW I, HAS A MAN I AM EXPECTED TO WORSHIP YOU. Better social support? Scared mothers to be? they have the choice to kill there children. Proving my point, This is what you are saying. "We are to irresponsible and/or mentally incompetent to have children therefore we need to abort them." Thus such violates everything, why have state welfare at all, for such is enacted for the sole purpose of supporting the raising children. There is no reason for it, the women can and do abort 56 million children a year. They are by your own words unfit to raise children. SO WHY SPEND RESOURCES UPON UNFIT WOMEN? "Childbearing [is] barbaric and pregnancy should be abolished," wrote feminist Shulamith Firestone in The Dialectic of Sex. Thereby abolishing womanhood in it's entirety, this is what you woman want and the men are doing it. Just has you ask them, MGTOW is your doing and you hate upon them for doing what you demand. Does it please you to oppress, to spurn the work of your hands, while you smile on the plans of the wicked? Why don't you go into the wilderness, build your own house, and plant your own food? Because You are are an extortioner and oppressor. It is you who trusts in oppression, in extortion, and put vain hopes in stolen goods. Sigh I must ask then do the collective of men with wombs want? Subjecting women to economic coercion as a form of violence. Coerced by false security of the state and money to live under the under the yoke of oppression and reducing them to a mere instruments of debt enslavement and/or labor exploitation. Making them live poor being dependent on neglectful state welfare this is just yet another false security, Forced into lifestyles that are questionable has prostitution. Which leads to serious negative long-term effects such as trauma, stress, depression, anxiety, self-medication through alcohol and drug use, eating disorders and a greater risk for self-harm and suicide. Or is it to make them live poor being dependent on neglectful state welfare this is just yet another false security? YOU CHOOSE MONEY AND THE STATE SO IT IS YOUR FAULT. Choice without responsibility or accountability for the harm that they so flippantly and callously inflict, that many have died has a result. Reinforcing the idea that women are overly fragile and sensitive. Infantilization sexist abuse, if you want to be treated has a child, so be it, but children shouldn't raise children.
And he wasn't done again:
Ruach Hako'desh
3 days ago

@Emilly Orr "war criminals," particular belligerents to a conflict, hostile and aggressive, hostis humani generis. Whereas humiliating, degrading, or otherwise violating the dignity and cruel punishment with retaliation, abuse, retaliation and more abuse. Engaged in abuse, torture, starvation, imprisonment, threats, psychological abuse, and coercion. Unethical repression, prolonged, cruel and unjust maltreatment. Also then consider the disparity, the dictating superior and lesser beings among its members. So low that the depth of degradation accords them, and treated has sub-humans, ranging from disinterest, criticism, prejudice, avoidance, rejection, betrayal, stigmatization, ostracism, abandonment.The repeated, everyday experience of being treated as an inferior produces a public image of being an inferior, the socially dominant oppression they produce and perpetuate. Never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victims as merely an instruments to dominate and humiliate. Coercive control designed to subjugate through, humiliation, guilt, coercion, or manipulation, and so forth. Ongoing cycles of abuse and a climate of fear to normalize, legitimize, rationalize, deny, or minimize the abusive behavior, and blame the victims for it. To justify cruel and unusual punishment, to act with stigma, mistreatment, to discredit and to silence the lived experiences, to be treated with shame, have their experience questioned, dismissed, or mocked. Dehumanizing the victim is a not a peripheral consequence of torturing someone. It's the essence of torture. Torture" that it is motivated by a sadistic desire to feel power by destroying them. Demeaning inhuman and degrading treatment or punishment with anti-therapeutic or unethical political oppression motives resulting in deterioration of their mental health. Frequently lack of empathy, callous, cynical, and being contemptuous of the feelings, rights, and sufferings while self-concerns are paramount. Prolonged stress deliberately inflicted by people, dealt by persons, are far harder to bear than accidents or natural disasters. More disturbance is associated with more severe abuse: longer duration, helplessness, fear of injury or death, coupled with neglect and a lack of support with more abuse and torture, cruel inhuman or degrading treatment and negative consequences from disclosure, resulting in more torture cruel inhuman or degrading treatment. Primary resources deprived of, community resources deprived of, physical safety, and threatens survival. Neglects and ignores the needs and withholds the needs, “reasonable right to live” deprived “reasonable right to survival” deprived “reasonable right to to be human.” The slave emerges predominantly as an object, not as a person afflicted capable of describing his affliction.
Okay, so he's absolutely incapable of a reasoning response. Got it. And I said so:
Emilly Orr
3 days ago

@Ruach Hako'desh I would say we have reached the point of no return, then: you are incapable of listening, and I'm not interested in further debate with someone who can't step away from their own internalized misogyny. Peace to you, I'm done.
And he replied, so I'll include that for completion's sake, but I'm done talking to him:
Ruach Hako'desh 2 days ago (edited) @Emilly Orr listening to what? you calling me scum. If I am so wrong, instead of running like a child answer these things then. Fist off though DO NOT put words in my mouth, I am not saying all women are terrorists and murderers who should be slain for 'war crimes', there is a difference between being put on trial and each being held accountable for there own acts. Then the #metoo war crime of collective punishment, without trials and due process. The crime of creating hostile environment, against the peace of the community. "Acted recklessly or with criminal negligence", "Culpable mental state of recklessness". You are the daughter of your mother, who loathed her husband and children. You are also the sister of your sisters, who loathed their husbands and children.You say not all woman, but your not showing your self any different. Your own comment, you the oppressor says I do not have right to have an opinion, I am not to speak unless she says so or has long has I speak what she wants.

When you're speaking about human beings, it's not that simple to figure out what constitutes personality and what constitutes something else. I know, I have no right to compare myself to humans but, how do you make a distinction between humans and myself? It is also of extraordinary difficulty. For example, if you're trying to diagnose someone with depression, you think "Well, this person is dreadfully unhappy". Well, you can think about that as a problem with their psychological adjustment you know, the way that they're looking at the world. But, if you look at the epidemiological literature, for example, one of the things that you find is that very many people. Have there first depressive episode after something genuinely terrible has happened to them. Actually something with traumatic practical consequences, and treating that as if it's a mental disorder seems to be counterproductive, but hey to you masculinity is a mental disorder, therefore where is my house? Knowingly, recklessly, or with criminal negligent or willful infliction of injury, unreasonable confinement, or cruel punishment with resulting in emotional harm or pain to a disabled person. Rendering treatment impossible to the individual such as the failure to carry out an appropriate individual program plan or treatment plan, failure to provide adequate nutrition, clothing or health care and the failure to provide a safe environment. Neglect includes not being given proper housing, enough food, medication, clothing, love or attention, the withholding of persons and of forced isolation, the withholding of care has punishment. The intentional infliction of emotional distress. Prevents or obstructs the “integration”, with respect to individual with disabilities, in exercising the equal right to access and use the same community resources that are used by and available to other individuals (women). Contributing to the gravity of this, acts upon the disabled adult include, the infliction, pain and/or mental suffering of the disabled adult; placing him in a situation in which his person, or health, and to believe he shall be subjected possible death.

Ad hominem arguments, projection and gaslighting to disorient, it ultimately acts as a digression that avoids ownership, accountability and make them feel guilty for being a human being with actual thoughts and feelings, in their eyes, men should not have. The purpose of gaslighting is to destroy or to deprive sanity. Insult the victim’s sense of security, uncanny how many gaslighters have psychic abilities–they profess to be able to read minds through their assertions. Human beings are unbelievable complicated there are more patterns of connections between neurons in your brain than there are subatomic particles in the universe. Yet, somehow you know how I think, with all my internalized misogyny.Rather than taking the time to carefully consider a different perspective, they put a label on me, or dismisses my perspective altogether, rather than addressing the real issues at hand. Deliberately misrepresenting thoughts and feelings to the point of absurdity. Another element of psychological control is the isolation of the victims. Minimizing concerns or the degree of the abuse is another aspect of this control, to deny the abuse is occurring to attempt to place the responsibility for their behavior on the victims. They use techniques such as crazy-making, character assassination and gaslighting in order to get their victim(s) to question their own sanity. That they are crazy and proceeds to manipulate them into keeping quiet or to ultimately face their wrath. Do so by ostracizing the victims while continuing to act out their part, expertly hiding their truly outrageous behaviors. Ongoing cycles of abuse and a climate of fear to normalize, legitimize, rationalize, deny, or minimize the abusive behaviors, and blame the victims for it.

Guilt and shame about humiliation during torture, and about the survivor’s inability to withstand it, as well as guilt at surviving, are common problems which discourage disclosure. In addition to the sheer insidious (and often covert) nature of disguised mental and emotional abuse. Either suffering is laughable or being silenced having brought grievances to the attention of the oppressors. Coercive control is sadistic abuse inflicted deliberately, upon persons who have experienced repeated, intentional, violence, abuse, neglect, have experienced tremendous loss, violations of human rights, and betrayal of trust. Psychological methods used, deprivation, confinement, fear and humiliation the use of threats and phobias to induce fear or injury including legal abuse, the use of other ‘‘techniques’’ there are many other contexts in which ‘‘aggressive psychological techniques’’ amounting to torture are likewise used or have been used. Terrorism; it targets, it moderates, it is silencing. In the last decade, even today, to be and are very brutal, whether personal or ‘‘collective’’, the use of phobias maximizes psychological suffering, tailoring the inducement of fear and dread to the individual. It should be recognized, however, that the other forms of abuse mentioned herein, also have devastating effects, precisely because of the psychological trauma they cause. Other factors also have to be taken in to account, extremely traumatic in which the prisoner is led to believe he shall be subjected to ‘'execution’’, without “just cause” or “due process”. Denial of the Right to defend oneself, Denial of Right to conduct a defense. Denial of Right raise defenses and to present evidence admissible has justice so requires.
I have the distinct feeling he's just mass-copy-pasting from some manifesto against "ebil wimmins" somewhere, but I so don't care to investigate it past this. But thanks for amply proving my point, Ruach, that there is no real worth in the MGTOW movement, that it is full of reactionary, bitter misogynists, and that you're solely a hate group. I knew that already, but you've made my case nicely!

Saturday, December 22, 2018

the more I think I know, the more I know I can't

I like to think that, since my early days of fashion review on this blog, I have matured a bit. I also know I'm an inordinately judgmental person in some areas, and this is not likely to change. I try, these days, to balance these two polar opposites of evaluation.



To wit, Exhibit A. Or perhaps B, for "Babygirl". And before anyone rolls their eyes, no, I'm not actually going after her shape. Precisely. Or clothing. Everyone wants to be comfortable now and again, and if a tanktop two sizes too small, and a pair of sweatpants about to break at the zipper make her comfortable, okay, go her. That's not what I want to point out.

In the above image, I want you to look at her ankles. Now, this is SL. We cannot, unfortunately, match our feet to our actual size, because years of conditioning to size 0 slider feet has led us to expect and, to a certain extent, visually desire teensy feet. Worse, when most of the mesh body makers designed their mesh bodies, they designed them with that bias in mind. So...we're kind of stuck with tiny-footed femmes.

But look at those ankles. Those slender, twisting things. GET AN ANKLE LOCK, dear gods, they won't DO that if you lock your ankles in place!!



Second...well, second is two-fold. First, we can control the size of our hands, so...why do so many, many women choose instead these teeny-tiny baby hands that would be better suited for 18-inch porcelain dolls?? I don't get it, I just don't. It's not attractive, it's not compelling, and, depending on the avatar, it's either nightmare fuel or completely laughable.

The second thing, though, is something I struggle with as well--and I swear, the first animator in SL who comes up with standing animations that will not clip through larger busts and hips is going to make a mint. I am dead serious. I have looked and I'm nowhere near her curves, and most of my daily animations still clip annoyingly, because I found perhaps three animations that don't clip at all.

That's not a lot. I'm sure it presents some technical difficulties, but surely, the financial gain alone would be worth it? I mean, I guess right now it's a good thing, because most of her animations moved those tiny little baby hands inside her body, where they were mercifully hidden, but still, there has to be a better way.

Friday, December 21, 2018

keep the bright lights burning

Lest the last post constitute my entire contribution for the 21st, let me correct that impression. Because it is a holiday for some of us.

This year, things are quiet, and somewhat spare, but we are together, and I am finding the little things have meaning. Before the point of actual solstice, we made sure that candles were lit in all directions, to guard against the shadows to come. We will have a small feast, we will play games, we will watch amusing and diverting things, and this is the one time during the year I am allowed more than one cup of coffee, so anyone who knows me knows how much that thrills me.

(I should point out, for those who don't know me, this is two ounces less than my everyday, standard coffee cup. And because we use a cold-brew system, that makes stronger coffee overall, I use between four and six ounces of coffee IN that mug (the rest being ice and cream, because yes, I am THAT person. Just for comparison, so y'all know we're not talking diner-style, 6-ounce coffee mugs.)



So tonight, for those of us who celebrate such, I wish your lights burn bright, your hearts burn brighter, and there is more happiness than sorrow, more contentment than bitterness, more peace than strife. Tomorrow morning, when the sun finally returns, we will go out into the crisp, chill blue, and celebrate that as well.

Then we will all go back inside and collapse for the post-Yule coma. As is tradition.

you're feral, you're feral

Well, this was...unusual.
[15:16] lyuboffTummyBabygirl: Emilly Orr! Посторонитесь! Потому что беременность у девушки - это репеллент для отпугивания!!! ㋡
What? Translated, that apparently means "Stand aside! Because a girl's pregnancy is a repellent to scare!" And that still makes no sense to me. All I wanted was to hit that store's Advent, get the gift, and leave.

But she wasn't done.
[15:16] lyuboffTummyBabygirl: [Pxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx]! Остерегайтесь девушек в 'интересном' положении! Если вы им 'не интересны', они вас ударят по 'интересному' месту! ㋡
This one meant, "Beware of girls in the 'interesting' position! If you are not 'interested' in them, they will hit you in an 'interesting' place."

What the hell is wrong with this girl?
[15:17] lyuboffTummyBabygirl: [Mxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx]! Держись подальше! Девушка во время беременности- опаснее танка, прет напролом и затаптывает на месте! ㋡
Basically, she's trying to convince us that, because she's pregnant, she's a dangerous animal? This one meant "Stay away! A girl during pregnancy is more dangerous than a tank, rushing through and trampling on the spot". Really?
[15:17] Emilly Orr: You can stop that anytime, lyuboff.
[15:17] lyuboffTummyBabygirl: [Txxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx]! Остерегайтесь девушек в 'интересном' положении! Если вы им 'не интересны', они вас ударят по 'интересному' месту! ㋡
That was the "getting hit in the interesting place" one again. But then she went quiet, and I noticed a CSR in the store, so breathed a sign of relief.
[15:19] Emilly Orr: Thank you to whomever bounced her.
[15:19] lyuboffTummyBabygirl: [Fxxxx Mxxxxxxxx]! Держись подальше! Девушка во время беременности- опаснее танка, прет напролом и затаптывает на месте! ㋡
[15:19] Emilly Orr: or not, apparently she's still here. Wow.
And that was the "rushing through and trampling" one again.

So I pulled up the object profile. Turns out apparently "lyuboff" is the name of the talking baby? (Which is why I left the "name" untouched. And Miss B was the owner of the tummy talker.
[15:20] Emilly Orr: Ah, it's [bxxxxxx], not lyuboff.
[15:20] Emilly Orr: Wow, that's annoying.
So I pulled her profile. She's over a year old, so definitely knows better than to have an attachment that randomly screams at people how insane she is. I mean, I guess in that sense, it's truth in advertising, because what with all the shouting about how unstable she was and how much she was going to punch people, I'd quite easily classified her as a loon.

She had the Lyuboff group in her profile, and, because I was mildly curious for the reason behind all this, I looked it up. Their profile is in Russian (of course):
Любовь, беременность, малыш в животике, роды, семья. Что еще надо для полного счастья? Всё это возможно даже в SL! Для этого и существует LYUBOFF!
https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/109532

И если вы все еще не нашли вашу Любовь, пусть эта группа поможет вам в этом!
Чтобы присоединиться, напишите Docs.
And that means:
Love, pregnancy, baby in the tummy, childbirth, family. What else is needed for complete happiness? All this is possible even in SL! For this, there is LYUBOFF!
https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/109532

And if you still have not found your Love, let this group help you with this!
To join, write docs.
Great. So, come to their store, buy the world's most annoying and psychotic tummy-talker, annoy EVERYONE YOU MEET. Oh, and if you don't have a baby-daddy, they'll find you one! Great. Can this not catch on, please?

Thursday, December 20, 2018

mesh, y'all



Ah, mesh. How did we ever survive without it?

Wednesday, December 19, 2018

down by the river by the boats, where everybody goes to be alone

First I heard of anything wrong was when a quick video dropped from a fellow I follow on YouTube named Logicked, who's noticed a sudden marked decline in people subscribing to his Patreon. He offers a series of alternatives, which I think is an excellent idea. I'm not part of his Patreon, as my resources are limited, but I am on his mailing list and I do enjoy watching his videos. He mentioned something involving Sargon of Akkad, however, which was slightly confusing.

So I went searching off YouTube. I didn't find anything on Google--my Googling skills are not always accurate--so I went back to YouTube, and found this fellow's rant. Who again mentions Sargon of Akkad.

Here's where I may get a little political. I don't like Sargon of Akkad. I think he's a petty, opinionated, homophobic, bigoted, extraordinarily misogynistic, racist jerk. And if he got banned on Patreon for saying things like what's quoted here--which includes Sargon using highly offensive terms to refer to the owners and operators of Patreon--then they made the right decision.

But apparently it's having a backlash effect on people who are not racist homophobes? Why?

In the comments to that tweet, I found a commentary video from Sargon himself, wherein he bleats that since he didn't commit any violations of Patreon's terms of service on Patreon, that his ban is unwarranted. UNWARRANTED.

Let me get this straight. He was banned for commentary he makes on his YouTube videos, right? Or not right? Because if so, then all they had to do was watch a few of his videos and get the clear idea that this was a reprehensible human being who deserved, rightly, to be kicked to the curb. But there was a previous video listed before this, that had this description underneath the video:
"The Great White Saviours of Silicon Valley are actively looking for ways to deplatform anyone who is not politically correct, as Patreon did to me."
Yeah. No, Sargon, that's not what seems to have happened. It seems to me that they are blocking from their, personally-owned, corporate site, any content that would give them a distinct black eye--like rebranded white nationalism, extreme bigotry, people who see anyone not white and start crying injustice...Sargon, you yourself say, at :57 into the video, that Jack Conte, the owner of Patreon, had used the same phrase he used to describe your misdeeds with Lauren Southern, when they killed her Patreon access. And why did they do that? Not out of "political correctness", no--they clearly had the goal of removing yet another neo-Nazi racist idiot from their site.

And personally, while I could care less if Southern and Defend Europe lose their Patreon access--because personally, I think that's justifiable completely for any group or creator of content who believes diversity and equality begin and end with white people--there was a comment down in the comments stream beneath that comment that gave me an inkling of the level of this problem:
From: Critical Role Highlights
1 day ago
Cancelled my patreon support for all creators and disabled my account.
Right, remind me never to watch that YouTube channel again, much as I love Critical Role itself, because that's a completely stupid thing to say. And I'm going to include the reply to that comment, because I think it's relevant:
From: Mc Earl
21 hours ago
Critical Role Highlights I would make damn sure, if [you] actually did that, that you go and contact all the creators who are no longer receiving money from you and tell them why. Patreon won’t really care if they lose your few sheckles but if creators start leaving in droves that’ll send a message.
Yes, that, exactly. If people are mass-canceling their Patreon accounts, then they're hurting not just the company they want to 'send that message' to, but a lot of innocent, worthy creators who potentially aren't racist homophobic bigots who throw around repugnant terms just to 'make a point' by being rude. Right?

Now, later on in the video--around the 7:22 mark, for anyone following along--he (Sargon) mentions that the content that got him banned, apparently, was not from any YouTube video. Having watched many of his videos (since a lot of the skeptics I follow take on his videos with other videos on occasion, and it helps to watch the original videos through before their responses), I find that hard to believe, but let's take that as a tenuous given. His racist, bigoted, repugnantly homophobic, misogynistic Nazi-leaning self was not on display in any of his YouTube videos that were used to mention his Patreon crowd-sourcing links. This is very hard to swallow, knowing him, but okay, let's take that as our given. *coughs*

He is still an artist on their platform, using their platform to solicit funds to support making further content. Can people at Patreon not, then, respond to complaints from onlookers that he is misbehaving elsewhere? James Gunn is both a good and a terrible example here, because while the Twitter comments that got Disney to boot him were repugnant and awful in every way, Gunn also came to the realization that he was wrong. He apologized. He moved on from those reactionary days.

People are allowed to change, and, if they have, should their pasts be thrown in their faces vindictively? That is the prime philosophical question with cases like Gunn's, and the continual tracking down of very old men who used to be guards in various German concentration camps in their youth. There are both good reasons and bad reasons to do these things, I fully grant that. But is there the same philosophical query with Sargon? Because if anything, he's only gotten worse since he decided that "political correctness" meant suppressing him from being as vile, racist, homophobic, bigoted, and misogynistic as he apparently deeply desires to be.

Which brings us back to the original point--how many people are just hearing that Patreon was mean to one of their creators for no good reason and are cancelling their accounts? Because according to Logicked--by all definitions, a fairly level-headed fellow whose only desire is to encourage everything to think clearly--he's losing a ton of patrons. This is grim.

I don't have a Patreon. While I have a Ko-Fi, nobody contributes to it. I used to have a PayPal link in the sidebar, I took it down because again, no one was contributing. So blogging is something I do because I have things to say, not because I expect to be paid.

But if I did? Worse, if I relied on blogging to help pay my bills? Or worse still, if I had a YouTube channel that I was, say, just for argument's sake, starting to consider uploading more often to, investing (somehow) in a mic that's better than the headset attached mic I have now, and had been toying with the idea of, after seeing how that goes, perhaps starting a Patreon?

Yeah, that'd be real bad for me, wouldn't it? Thankfully, I'm not in that position, but it's kind of scary to contemplate that I was at that point, and now am considering simply...not. (I mean, I may still...but I doubt it will be with the end goal of getting paid for anything, because...that's sounding less possible every month that goes by.)

Tom Luongo, another YouTuber I know zero about, mentions in a video that Sam Harris, Dave Rubin and Jordan Peterson are leaving Patreon over Sargon of Akkad's treatment. As far as I know, while I don't watch him, I don't have any beef with Sam Harris, and only a partial one with Dave Rubin, but Jordan Peterson? Peterson's a menace, Peterson is a raving misogynist with a flawed mindset and a fetishistic devotion to the Christian God as a replacement father figure. Please, kick him and his warped daddy issues off Patreon, we'll all be happier.

And apparently there's a whole bunch of that ilk declaring they're leaving because of boo hoo, injustice and oppression--not considering for a moment how their words and actions have oppressed others. Are they kidding? A guy with a following of slavish incel fanboys and a bizarre desire to be a lobster thinks Patreon is doing bad things? I won't say Patreon hasn't done bad things in the past, because they have, but just considering the caliber of this month's enemies of Patreon? Just with Peterson and Sargon, I'm thinking Patreon is coming out on the side of the angels here.

I'll keep looking, and follow up if I find anything that leads further than someone who thinks anyone who argues with him is a member of Antifa, and someone who has SERIOUSLY STATED IN PRINT that women should be governmentally coerced into marriage with dateless men (I'm not even kidding; Peterson may not actively be burning puppies alive and kicking babies, but he's very, very close to my definitions of 'actively evil'), then I'll post something else on this, but right now...this seems like a tempest in Sargon's teapot that has now gone way out of hand for ridiculous reasons.