Sunday, September 18, 2016

what would you do, do, do?

We rejoin our previous coverage, already in progress.

In the library upstairs, Alice straitjacket model ripped from the second American McGee's Alice game, check.

And large pustulent Boomer ripped from one of the Left 4 Dead games, check. What I don't get: the bling on the bloody wooden club studded with nails. The bright blue sparkly stars flying out of the floating books. The floating books were very well done, hint of glow, so...was the rest really needed?

Sitting in the nursery, two things occurred to me: first, that this room was, again, rather well done. Sure, haunted nursery, seen it before, but the translucent blue floating toys, that was neatly done.

But second, and this is VERY important--if you're going to explicitly say "no sex" in your event description, don't put a sex bed in the childrens' nursery. Just...don't do it, be smart about these things.

Oh, dear gods:

[21:25] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: screms
[21:25] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: daddys
[21:25] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: yus ?
[21:25] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: i gets gums in you hars
[21:25] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx giggles cutely
[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: i smelys down hers
[21:26] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: ewww look
[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: you farts
[21:26] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: No!
[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: why it stinkys

[21:26] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: because of that man there
[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: ewwws
[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: he needs bafs
[21:26] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: see thats what happens when you swallow bubble gum

[21:26] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: no :(
[21:27] Lxxxxx Dxxxxx: yikes
[21:27] exxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: daddys dont puts me in that cage

I loathe affected baby talk, and, as I've said before, it's because I and my friends at that age did not devolve into this affected baby patois, so it always hits my ear as unnecessary, overly precious--in the very worst sense of the world--and a measure of the avatar's intelligence, or extreme lack thereof. There is more to this haunt than the one path leading up to the one house, but after this conversation, I fled. Nothing in this house would have made me run away, but--these two did, at speed.

Overall, I'd say it's an overdone haunt with several overused cliches, but it also has some good things here and there. If you're up for winnowing through the obnoxious to get to the nice, feel free. Elsewise, move along to the next haunt experience.

No comments: