I tried to teach you solitaire, you just hollered at the moon (part two)

(Continued from yesterday's entry.)

[11:43] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I've complained enough.
[11:44] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I'm sure not everyone is pleased with me
[11:44] Emilly Orr: It's just baffling. She keeps doing this.
[11:44] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She's out of excuses...
[11:45] Emilly Orr: Do you give her another chance, is the question.
[11:45] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: That is exactly the question
[11:45] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: If she's replaced all of her stuff will be returned
[11:46] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She definitely cannot pay any rent that will cover a sim sized platform
[11:47] Emilly Orr: True. Also ouch, that's right, she's basically "renting" a skybound sim.

She'd asked [Txxx] to give her a 'learning center' space, that she wanted to look "natural" to the area, so...in talks on what she wanted, they decided on the sim-size platform over the entire ground-level sim. So on that platform, there are trees, hills, foliage--all now in winter with added piles of snow--and buildings. Buildings which, in my estimation, have been used exactly once for one class. Yule was a failure, two of the three classes following--four, if you count this one--are dead on arrival, so...what is the point of the additional sim and prim space reserved for her use?

[11:47] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Both of them have been given an opportunity to contribute to Thorvaldshavn and failed
[11:48] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: That's right
[11:48] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: there's a couple of thousand linden in that, per week
[11:48] Emilly Orr: At least.

And that's daunting in itself, innit? I mean, by no means am I rich; I wouldn't have lost my Caledon parcel by not dancing for tips for two months if I was even up to lower middle-class in income. But sim owners cannot be supposed to be rich, either, and even if they are, even if they can afford to own seventeen sims (and most can't), they still will not ever be comfortable tossing thousands of prims to someone without something in return. Friendship, help on the sim, rent, whatever--something, or it's an entirely one-sided transaction.

Right now [Ixxx] is a one-sided transaction.

[11:49] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: They both were allowed to live here rent free because they were contributing to our group and sim.
[11:50] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: And neither has fulfilled their part. Or am I wrong?

I don't think he's wrong.

[11:51] Emilly Orr: This is such a mess. How is she a member of a Norse faith and not learned the values of responsibility, standing behind her words, at the very least?
[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: No idea...
[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: is her disease part of her problem?

There are RL issues I won't go into, but she is affected by them.

[11:52] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Am I being self-absorbed and petty?
[11:53] Emilly Orr: I can't imagine how unless it affects her memory and impulse control.

And if so, if that is the case--and I am not saying it is--shouldn't she mention that to people who are relying on her? Not the breakdown of specifics, no one is "owed" that, but just a general--"I may have problems doing [X]?

[11:54] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: She saw the comment about her attention span and she had to IM me, saying she was gnat-brained
[11:54] Emilly Orr: Yeah, but that's an excuse at this point.
[11:54] Emilly Orr: She flips it out as if it's supposed to protect her.
[11:54] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I said, "no your not... your attention span is short."
[11:55] Emilly Orr: It's like Yule, all her hand-wringing over "Freyr is mad at me". Yeah, great, then fix it. How would he want you to repair this? And she ignored both of us, and just kept hand-wringing.
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I told her straight up. She needs to learn how to manage and stay on things
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Yes.. exactly
[11:55] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I think she's done
[11:56] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I really don't need this
[11:56] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I've already raised two kids.. I'm not doing another who's a manipulator.

For me, the question is why she's a manipulator. Not that she is one, and sure, that kind of thing can start in childhood, I get that--but I mean, in SL. How has she spent ten years on the grid and expected other people to just cover for her like this? She doesn't move her own prims, she expects other people to do that. She asks for things she can't afford and expects them just to be given to her. She starts events two hours late, IF she starts them at all, and she expects everyone to fawningly accept this level of mistreatment. So who the hell was covering for her over the last ten years of SL? Because whoever they were, they're not here now. And we're not interested in being her fetch-and-carry servants.

[11:56] Emilly Orr: Aiii. So you already deal with this, yeah.
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx nods
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: they both turned out well
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: they aren't jailbirds and are sober
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: and have good jobs
[11:57] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I did what I was supposed to do
[11:57] Emilly Orr: You have.

For me, that's the mark of a good parent. Did he and his kids always get along? Probably not, growing up is hard, emotions run high, arguments are bound to happen. But he got them to adulthood, neither died, neither are addicted to horrible things, neither went to jail. That's indicative of a success rate, to me.

[11:59] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: No wonder Birka failed.
[11:59] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: with those two in charge
[11:59] Emilly Orr: They're both so bad at this.

They really are. And even worse--[Vxxxxxx], who left the sim entirely to go chase Gorean slave girls, as a slaver, left nearly 5000 prims rezzed out on the sim. Inge, with her 'learning center' sky platform, has 1,500. This is a full-size sim now, not a homestead, but that's still more than 6,500 prims that they're using--and for what? [Vxxxxxx] is never there, and has unfriended all of us (though he hasn't left the group), and [Ixxx] is just...useless in every way. So why are we still hosting their things if they aren't working for the sim?