and you better start swimmin', or you'll sink like a stone

for the times they are a-changin'...

Yeah. Sometimes it do be like that.

come gather ’round, people
wherever you roam
and admit that the waters
around you have grown...

August 28th, 2023, fell on a Monday, at least in the northern hemisphere. Monday was also family dinner at the mansion. The family knew it was the anniversary. It was...an uneven night, not unsurprisingly. How does one celebrate having an unending tension headache for a full solar year?

I'm the one on the end with the moths.

and accept it that soon
you’ll be drenched to the bone
if your time to you is worth savin’...

Dinner also featured a spritely vintage from Darkmere, and I was grateful for it.

I think even virtual wine goes to my head occasionally. I wasn't exactly effervescent, but I did seem more...open is not the word? Fluid, mayhap. Confessional. Something.

the line, it is drawn
the curse, it is cast
the slow one now
will later be fast

So, it's been a year, and what have we learned? I beyond the glass may have Celiac's, and if not, then a fairly unstable version of gluten intolerance. No one knows why the headache persists. Half my doctors are treating me as if I am diabetic, and the other half aren't--and meanwhile, my pursuit for a diagnosis of SOME kind keeps driving off the cliff, the latest being my (new resident) doctor's confidence in the latest A1C being "fine" (even with some other symptoms and readings in other tests).

Let's not forget that in the course of one month (with blood tests at either end) I went from some issues we needed to work on to HOLY FARKING DUCKLINGS YOU HAVE THIRD-STAGE KIDNEY DISEASE...which, by the way, disappeared with the next blood test...



Oh, and my neurologist's officially thrown me away, because there's "nothing neurological" she can fix. But if I develop something...something that's not migraines, headache, nerve pain, and a kicky little tremor, apparently...she says I should feel free to call her.

Sure. Let me just make a note about that....how does the 32nd of February next year work for you?

But that...admittedly, adapting to that led to some very dark days.

Witness this was supposed to be shot, and framed, and written, and posted, on the 28th...and I slipped a couple days due to sudden depression slogging through the mire.

as the present now
will later be past
the order is rapidly fadin'...

Stone-home truth, here: I started wondering what was the point. Now, no one call in wellness checks, guys, I am not in danger, believe me. But there was some staring into the abyss, namely...Should I still keep counting? Should I stop? If I stop, what do I replace it with? If I keep counting, when does it become another obsession? When do I get to pick up the threads of my life and get back to reality, fractured as it was?

And the deep, midnight-in-sealed-crypts dark question: is this the new baseline, and I just have to suck it up from here?

So, yeah. Took a couple days to catch up with everything.

and the first one now
will later be last
for the times they are a-changin'...

If nothing else, I have the garden. It keeps me occupied when I have spare non-hurty time. I stay in touch with friends and loves as I can. It's not a terrible life. I may have to ask Aiko where she gets her running-in-circles animation from, because I bet it would be mad frenetic on a Dinkie.

I will admit, it is a struggle some days NOT to go huge (like, giant thorn vines huge, mysterious earth portals that fling folks in a random direction huge), but so far I'm constraining things. I'm working on changing out all the no-copy flora (and the non-seasonal flora), so it will be easier to change from season to season...

...because WHY YES I have noticed the lack of seasons on the land and I miss it, and that, at least, I can start pushing out in Tannhauser and Gearhaven.

For the rest of it...well, I am a very stubborn muffin. I may be bruised, battered, staggering and broken, and it may take me longer to stand up...but I intend to keep standing up for some time yet. This weekend I may spend more time with the offworld partners, and idly make new things out of old things while we watch the next episode of Mentopolis on Dropout. (I am still convinced that Hank Green is just playing himself in that season...or, at least, Hank Green if he was bright red, in a weird 40s noir mystery, and of his hands were bigger than his head...but otherwise, yeah, that's my working theory.)

And life will move on, as is the way of such things. And I'll get back to product reviews soon, because I do like them, first, and second, for baffling reasons they haven't slapped my wrist for going past some event times, so if nothing else, they're building up unswerving brand loyalty from me. It helps that I adore Grim and Mesmer to death, too, it must be said.

But now it's late, and it's been a long day, some of it spent dashing between transport and clinic doors with ice-cold rain in between, so I suppose this is as 'done' as it gets, right now. G'night.

guess he finally found the straw that broke the camel's back

The Awilda hat is the current Fifty Linden Friday offer at Poison Rouge. As stated, it's going for L$50. But as is tradition, I failed to actually POST this on the 14th, so...go me, I guess.

[[Note from the Editrix: and then failed to post it for several days after. Not only that, but I managed to lose the picture of me IN the damned thing.]]

Did I mention the Darkness event is open now? (Though I'm not sure why I would, Vae.V isn't at that one...it just occurred to me, I guess, because I'm covering the Aza'Telos Monolith set, which was at July's Darkness event...

I am hopelessly behind.)

Oh, and there's a new Merkins vid out, I just realized...but anyway.

So, the Duchess' Garden has evolved substantially since I took these pics, and that's primarily because I took a random port from someone in the Contraption group and found myself in front of the booth there for the Wizarding Faire (which I had been avoiding, because, you know, the transphobia has kind of poisoned the property for me)...and promptly bought the Fournier Conservatory. I think it's still open, though, and if you want a Conservatory of your very own, go here with L$600 and it can be yours.



Meanwhile, we're talking about the Monolith set. At the last Darkness event, it ran L$450; now, I'm not even sure if it's in the mainstore (but you're welcome to check). Pretty sure the L$450 was a discount, though.



So I took out the medium and plonked it down in front of the altar for the Duchess' new garden, AKA, "Em thinks she can build things right now".



It's a pretty set, adaptable, just choose your height and your prim count and the tint, and go.



And it's a lovely glow effect on the runes.

The entire Monolith set compromises about six different options, from small to huge, and glowing and non, and high prim and low prim versions. It am comprehensive, is what I'm saying. It also comes with a tinting HUD. The ones you see in the pics I took (about...halfway to August, I think they were...) have largely been some shade of gold and purple.


This one, one of the huge ones, I rezzed out just behind the Conservatory, for a size comparison...

...and it's absolutely unresponsive, that's odd...Wait...

Did I push the big one over the sim border?!

Turns out, I did--all I had to do was fly over to the far side, and it tinted like a dream (which with my usual fine attention to detail, I forgot to capture in a photo).

If you want to see the Conservatory, the (free, btw) mossy snake statues (also from Contraption), or the Monolith that remains, you're welcome to drop by. The Duchess' Garden will likely be in flux for some time...similar to the Duchess, really.

And if you tire, there's sangria and sweet tea to be had inside the Conservatory. Enjoy.

The Ezekiel Nighthunter's hat from Vae Victis

And I quote:

[12:14 PM]♰ 𝓛𝔞𝔡ყ 𝔇𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥 ♰: @everyone Hey guys! Been drooling over the /Vae Victis\ - "Ezekiel" - Nighthunter's Hat but you're on a budget? Well now it is available at the "Sales Room" event for only 75L! This hat is one of the sexiest hats ever made in my opinion. Certainly a must have to be dashing on any occasion!

I have no idea if it's still at the Sales Room, honestly.

[[Note from the Editrix before publishing: yep, blew right past the deadline, the next round has designers filling booths as I speak. Bah.]]

So off we go to the main store to find out the price there!

And it turns out to be L$400, and can be found at the main store. It's still a great deal, considering the customization options, but yes.

[[Another insert: I should also say, the original date on this post was July 14th. Why the delay? Well, it's been...a bad couple of weeks, let's say. And it's also Day 333 of the Eternal Headache. We are so close to living a full year of this. Which is not what I wanted, ideally...]]

Anyway! Onward!



I won't lie, I'm getting serious Valentine vibes with this hat on this look. All I need is heart-shaped glasses...which...I may have in the inventory somewhere...



Shoulder cat does not like. He keeps aggressively sweeping my shoulders to knock the hat's feather's away.



Of course, part of that is it occasionally clips through his little hat, so that could be part of it, too. He's touchy.



The very close, in-person (or in-kitten?) tete-a-tete wherein he gave me ten minutes to ditch the hat or else.



Flying around me until I've ceded to his tiny demands. But while we're here, just look at the patterns. And I adore how the hat pattern is also part of the hat band.

Pretty sure he's preparing to cast a fireball.



So I went back home--or, at least, back to the Duchess' Garden, AKA, 'Em thinks she can build things right now"
that I'm setting up--whereupon I realized I hadn't included the HUD. So here it is.

Look at all those options! And, as shown, the feather colors I chose to (more or less) go with the outfit and the skin, being black, pink, and purple. Gold for all the metals, purple for the hat.

[[Another insert from the Editrix before publishing--I had this dated July 30th, so...yeah. It's been....boy, how it's been.

[[Something I'll just drop off here, from a Patreon I'm in, wherein the artist asked all of us how we were.]]



That was my answer. And...yeah. Not playing the pity card, just...things are starting to get substantially delayed, as further degradation occurs. I'm doin' my best, y'all.