when you get back on a Saturday night and your head is caving in

(Roleplay-ish)

She sat in a chair woven of birch branches and strands of lights, brooding. Her knees were tucked under her chin as she remembered earlier, the hours earlier, his lips on her skin, his firm embrace, his presence, after so, so long...and his words, murmuring that he could sense her hunger, he could tell how long it had been since she fed...



Briefly, she resented this, blinking in a rush of sudden emotion, before she paused, and truly thought that through. And...she sighed. Because, of course, why would someone so close to her heart not know her? How could she so foolishly dismiss the insight of the first one who'd ever inherited her gift, or curse, whatever it was in truth...and who knew the shape and flavor of that particular hunger, himself?



How, indeed.

She shook her head at herself, tongue clucking. She'd grown so accustomed to being the only one, arrogant, perhaps, with that hunger, red of eye and long of tooth, her constant companion. She'd grown used to its presence, always a few steps behind, always aware of the gnawing in her belly, the desire to grow her fangs and...just...bite.



But she also refused to just use people for fodder. And she'd gotten fairly good at ways to restrain the need--she'd grown quite fond of arsenic tea, and there was a certain extract made from Destroying Angels and manchineel, though it was difficult to produce. There was one other thing she could do in times of great duress, but...she preferred not to think about it.



She sighed again. Perhaps an apology was due him, for so mistakenly thinking she could simply turn aside his innate understanding, her own hunger, concentrating on his...but again, habit, custom, arrogance, she saw it now. She fed him and was, somewhat, fed herself; he fed her, and felt the same. It wasn't just the sweet red on the lips, it was the trail of entwining energy that came with it. That trail of energy, the cord that bound them together, reinforced with every touch, every kiss, every bite.



She wrinkled her nose. Yes. She definitely owned her love an apology. She went into the treehouse, hunting for her writing desk, a spare pen, and the Gearhaven seal to press into the envelope after. At least the garden was close to done...

the bats have left the bell tower, the victims have been bled

(Note from the Editrix: Because these are mounting, sadly, I'm going to start generally indicating when they were written, as opposed to published. This one is from the 12th of July.)

Ran across something that sounded both dire and portentious, but also not original on someone's profile? It's a powerful statement, but I wanted to know for sure.

Turns out I was right, it's the last lines of a poem called "Letter From My Brain To My Heart" by Rachel McKibbens:

You have my permission not to love me;
I am a cathedral of deadbolts
and I'd rather burn myself down
than change the locks.

And...damn. I can at least say I am not that bad, but...I won't lie, that poem does resonate.

In related but dissimilar news, I am still unsettled, but now it's more trying to find my footing on jagged chips of shale, not fractured glass and cinders, so...upgrade?



We move on. I hadn't thought about Transylvania in years, and on a separate search, ran across the name again. Was it still there?



That answer is very much yes, and very much improved!



Admittedly, I never wandered far from the Wall, having mostly gone there for dances, or to see a DJ I was fond of at the time.



But it seems to have really filled out, expanded a bit, and some of the scenery...



If nothing else, it's a lovely night stroll.



And, of course, one must stop and stand in awe of this.



Meanwhile, at Enchantment...



And no, no no no, I wanted a duelling flamingo, not a... *sighs* Oh, well, I guess it will do. (A note, having now gone to the store in question--I'm not sure which event CURELESS made the Alice in Monsterland gacha for? But it's not at their main store, and I picked this drooping fellow up off the Marketplace.)

sing the praises of no flag, we set the tone

Munster's Haunted House's blurb says:

Welcome to Munster's Haunted House! A fun and interactive house for everyone. Explore the house and interact with different things throughout... You never know when something is going to pop out at you... There are tons of places for photo opportunities

Okay. What have we got to lose?



Okay. Big, rambling house, eldritch green light, boarded-up windows. We must be in the right place.



Well, that's direct.



So many rips, I got tired of snapping pics of them. I did like these curtains, though.



I won't lie, the coffin just off the bar is surprisingly comfortable.



Right, because an all-clown room, with bloodied grass growing from the wooden floor, in the middle of an abandoned house, makes sense.

There is an upstairs, discovered during a camera slip, but I never found the stairs up.

Overall, it's not terrible. Most of the rooms make sense, some don't. If you ignore the fact that copyright infringement is rampant and there there's few considerations for if those rips fit well in those rooms, you're probably fine wandering through it if you're bored.

(Note from the Editrix: in camming around for a last shot to tie this up, I discovered where the stairs up were: behind the coffin. In other words, turn left, not right, through the archway, and you'll see them. Also, there's apparently another set of stairs, but there's nothing much up there: some moving boxes, and a glowing blue pool.)

I'm goin' to Muriel, see, can I bring some coffee home? (part 2)

So, near the entrance--before one walks through the entry gate, in point of fact--is a port up to the Haunted Skybox.



It's very dark up here. I'm finding a new Windlight setting.



That's a bit better. What that parchment actually says only applies to people playing Bloodlines. I don't, so I'm passing it by. The wolf's pretty good, though.



Ancient, demonic statue on a deep sanguine carpet while lightning flashes outside. Atmospheric.



The lady of the cas...skybox?...drifting through a bedroom, complete with sex bed, while portraits of bloodletting line the walls. Sure.



Going down one level brings us to a pool of blood--very derivative--set into a bloodspattered checkerboard floor, with a slowly rotating corpse floating on the surface. Ick.



And on the other side of the room, various implements of torture and deathing.

Okay, so...it is actually following the rules of moderate sims--sex in the sky, PG (more or less) on the ground. And for blood fetishists, this would be a party--blood splashed on nearly every surface, pools of blood, fanged photography--the gang's all here in that sense. But to be honest, I liked the ground level better. S'just me, I know, but...there seemed to be a sense of whimsy downstairs, and some sense of subtlety here and there, whereas upstairs? It's all WE'RE VAMPIRES GRR WE'RE EVIL LOOK AT OUR VICTIMS NOW HAVE SEX. I mean...yeah, okay, we get it, now can you back it up a bit?

It's not the worst haunt I've been to this year. But it's far from the best. There are some good touches, but most of them are downstairs. Take it in if you're bored, I'd say.

I'm goin' to Muriel, see, can I bring some coffee home? (part 1)

Okay. Took a bit of research, and trying out different things, but--for now--I ran a test entry with the new picture display system in place, and it seems to work. Now I just have to redo it for every other image on my blog, and sorry, folks, I'm only going to do this--again, for now--for the recent entries only (September 1st on). It's just too daunting to consider doing this for every single image that's ever been posted on the blog.

But...until I can secure a more permanent solution...this puts the blog back to as functional as it was before. Ish.

Now then. The next haunt. Something isn't adding up here. The description of the place:

*~~* Family Land where All are Welcome. Peaceful Friendly Place for Couples to Share Romance, Love, Dancing, Date, Photogenic Environment for Relaxation and Romance. Adult Animations, Halloween Cemetary and Haunted Skybox. Seasonal Themed

Okay, so...nothing makes this a a haunt but "Halloween Cemetary and Haunted Skybox", nearly the very last set of keywords?

Oh, and keep in mind, while they say they feature Adult animations, they're on Moderate-rated mainland. Just FYI.



Though the gate we go.



Okay, I actually really liked the dance circle until I noticed the pole at dead center. Is that really...?



It is! It's one of the old Sine Wave poles! Man, I spent a lot of time on those at various clubs.



Just some skeletons chillin' by the tree.



Radioactive spider. Huh.



And a winged skeleton catching some moon rays.

So yeah. This isn't terrible. But she mentioned a skybox?

keep on the path I sent you on

And this sort of sheer, unadulterated, malicious violation of Twisted hunt's own posted rules just confirms I made the right choice to leave the group.

So we're taking another tack, and stepping away from hunting for a bit. This is another store, but clearly, it is a store with a difference.

The blurb reads thusly:

Pandemonium has a collection of dilapidated structures, sim prefabs, parcel prefabs and landscaping products. Great for Halloween. Est. 2009 New Mesh Cemetery Graveyard Gothic Medieval Swamp Dungeon CCS Blood Grunge Zombie Shack Ruins MC Vampire Cliffs

Let's look around.



Shouldn't more stores welcome us in with a giant's screaming skull?



Good to know, I'll keep it in mind if I run into any.



Nice little sitting area, if one needs to rest a bit. No coffee, but no one's perfect.



No one can say P4NDOR4 Quintessa's prices aren't high. But just look at the detail given for her works. Amazing. The aging, the weathering, the moss growing on parts of the stone, the cracks--no sharp angles, no texture flickering, nothing ever that looks pasted just on the surface.



Why is there a unicorn following me around? Does he not know what I do?

Anyway, if you're in need of collapsing ruins, tumbled stones along a path, dilapidated prefabs--Pandemonium is your one-stop shop.

tearing through each doubt and sin, the train was an iron wind

Next up, we're traveling to Yalu, and the Spooktacular Haunted House 2018. The bio just seems to be buzzwords:

"Gather your friends and visit our annual haunted house. Complete interactive haunted house free to explore and to put you in the Halloween spirit.
"Haunted House, Haunted Castle, Halloween, Spooky, Scary, Halloween Ball, Dance, Creepy, Monsters, Ghosts"

Okay...



Oh, good, we get to start with media rips, this one being the bat form from Bram Stoker's Dracula. I think they know that, too, because the sound effect--repeated far too often--is "I can't wait to drink your blood".



Okay. That's not terrible. Things may be looking up.



I have no idea. One skeleton on the ground rezzes two others. They dance around each other, then tilt strangely, then line up and lay back down. It's...art?



Yeah, we all get it, we miss P.T., stop ripping off game properties. Also note the trio of Alices from F.E.A.R. circling in the background.

I'm done here.

twelve o'clock at night, and the moon is full (part three)

And off we go again! We're picking up from the last one, and remember, this all happened on the same night. I didn't even go back to the night previous, when, as Mm. J points out, he came in flying off some obtained substance, and drew the ire of several people then:

[8:36 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: Theres a concern i have [Rxxxxxx]. You were high as a kite last night, now plenty of people enjoy a little weed, but you were toasted. If we offered sensitive information i want to know you were taking it seriously.
[8:36 PM] Rxxxxxx: No that is really understandable.
[8:37 PM] Rxxxxxx: Its your place. Noobs be mean.

Wow. He's really coming off as a top-level 4chan troll. Or a complete idiot. Or both.

[8:37 PM] Cxxxxxxx: [Rxxxxxx]. A point I want to stress and this is speaking from my own perspective... I'm just a regular everyday guy with a odd condition. I have a job, a life, I love chipotle, I have a dog and a wife. If I had a say I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing. In fact I have ditched self care but after a certain time everything degrades and we're back to cluster migraines, weakness, lethargic, pain. I'm not really fond on being found neat or unique based on my medical needs. It makes one feel like a circus side show for someone's amusement rather than being respected as a individual.
[8:38 PM] Rxxxxxx: See that shit be badass! Like you tottaly have that right. As each person has basic rights

That's been his thing all along. "Y'all are totally cool freaks! And of course I support you as people with rights, like the rest of us." It comes off as massively disingenuous.

[8:39 PM] Rxxxxxx: And that's what we all are. People.
[8:39 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: I guess if you expect to find an supernatural, fanged immortal, it isn’t happening. If you think you will talk to someone with a fridge with a 540 ml worth of vaccutainers of human blood, you might
[8:40 PM] Rxxxxxx: As person. Sentient being. Like me but different. Its hard to belive. But i am nothing. No one official. I am just really curious.

"Believe". And what's so hard to believe? No one's a cookie-cutter exact copy of another, not even twins. So why the 'like me but different' line?

[8:40 PM] IXX: Only 540? [Jxxxx] you're slackin
[8:40 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: Lol, you are right, i need to place some calls
[8:40 PM] dxxx: [Rxxxxxx] you're curious, but we're not here to satisfy your curiosity
[8:41 PM] Rxxxxxx: Exactly how it should be. I have been very rude. I apologize.
[8:42 PM] Rxxxxxx: This is cool to me im sorry.

This is still sounding more like a defense. Like, he's apologizing, but then he tells us why he shouldn't be held accountable. That's BS, plain and simple.

[8:43 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: You don’t speak like a person serious about a medical condition. The language you use is too impertinent

Very much so.

[8:44 PM] Cxxxxxxx: But the media and individuals often don't treat us with dignity or respect so you can see why some are apprehensive. Most treat us as the brunt or affront of a comedic joke. Either that or mental. They take our logs and run off with them to post on a website and go hehe look at me , I'm nothing like this guy, he drives a Prius and thinks he's some Lestat-esque character. I bet he's got fangs and a cape.
[8:46 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Also I don't drive a Prius but a compact car lol
[8:46 PM] Rxxxxxx: Dude. Ive been racking my brain like crazy. And i think i have a good guess as to your condition. I could start using big words. But
You know emotions are special. They are caused by belief and those are caused by repeated action. Im sorry for those who suffer just being themselves

What the hell does that even mean?! He could start using 'big words' but we're not worth it? He could sound educated, and not like a complete troll, but he wants to be 'one of the gang'? What the hell is he after, here??

[8:48 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: Are you selling a “book” that is nothing, on Amazon in order to raise money?

Yep. Three of them. They're not even hard to find.

[8:48 PM] Rxxxxxx: Some people do magick stuff. Others simply jeer and sneer at what they dont know. I just think its cool. I apologize again for stepping on any toes. And anything offensive.
[8:49 PM] Rxxxxxx: Not anytime soon. But. This is mostly for the life experience.
[8:49 PM] Rxxxxxx: About the book.

As said, he's self-published three books on Amazon. I didn't bother looking into them further, because "Stupid" was part of the title of each one.

[8:49 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Magick stuff? I'm not out here summoning baphomet for tea parties or sacrificing virgins to moloch lol
[8:49 PM] Hxxxx Gxx: Given that no one has 'cured' us since the dawn of mankind, to which vampires can be traced back to in mythology, I doubt you have any new information that's going to 'help' us.

It's not that we don't want help. We're happy with help. Many of us have participated in medical studies, in serious, peer-published medical review papers. However, that doesn't mean we're going to slavishly listen to every yahoo who comes trolling in from 4chan looking for salacious nuggets to share with his fellow trolls. No. This is now how we work.

[8:50 PM] Rxxxxxx: No I Do magick stuff. Personally. Real deal. No bs.

I want to say, I very much doubt this, but it could very well mean he's a chaos mage, just...not a very bright one. It's possible.

[8:50 PM] Hxxxx Gxx: Plus a metaphysical solution won't sell very well to the med-sangs :wink:
[8:50 PM] Hxxxx Gxx: Yes, a lot of us do too. 11 years here.
[8:50 PM] dxxx: you're actually being rather insulting, thinking you've got a clue after a few hours...
[8:51 PM] Rxxxxxx: Well. I can be all arrogant.
[8:51 PM] Rxxxxxx: But that won't prove anything.

Hasn't so far.

[8:51 PM] Cxxxxxxx: I do magick stuff. Getting out of bed and going to work every morning is magick to me :joy:
[8:51 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: Thats not a admirable trait
[8:51 PM] Nxxxxxxx: And you're not the first to suggest it's just in our heads. So far I haven't seen you ask any questions, just say you practice magic and want to blow the lid on occult practices.

And that he prefers to talk on voice when intoxicated, don't forget that.

[8:51 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: Arrogance
[8:51 PM] Rxxxxxx: Seriously dude THAT IS magick maaan

Arrogance is magick? No, arrogance is just disappointing, 'dude'. Arrogance just means he can be easily dismissed as a know-nothing blowhard, which is largely the conclusion we're starting to draw.

[8:52 PM] Rxx: is it just me or is rev kinda rude

"Kinda" rude? I'd say he's a full-on revolting jerk. But maybe that's just me.

[8:52 PM] Rxx: at times
[8:52 PM] dxx: [Rxxxxxx] is hella rude
[8:52 PM] Rxxxxxx: No i could be. Bragging. But. I wont. I already said i waa an [***hole] silly
[8:52 PM] dxxx: very condescending

"Was", and yep. Condescending. Arrogant. Drunk. Not really giving us any answers on what he's trying to learn. So complete waste of time, basically.

[8:52 PM] dxxx: not listening
[8:52 PM] Cxxxxxxx: That weed tho lol
[8:52 PM] Rxxxxxx: Yeah. Thats the point.
[8:52 PM] Nxxxxxxx: This is pinging as a troll or someone very young. Think that's all I need to know
[8:52 PM] Rxxxxxx: Im 22.

So, 'very young' applies, then, considering the median age of users of this chat group runs 35+.

[8:53 PM] Rxxxxxx: Feeling all giddy. Im learning so much. Like im sorry.
[8:53 PM] Nxxxxxxx: 22 and master of the occult and can cure vampirism. I'm so very, very impressed.
[8:53 PM] Cxxxxxxx: What "magick" are you into [Rxxxxxx]?
[8:53 PM] Rxxxxxx: Nah. Its like having schizophrenia or diabetes.
[8:53 PM] Rxxxxxx: Which i may or may not be.
[8:54 PM] Rxxxxxx: I am schizo. Though.
[8:54 PM] Nxxxxxxx: And have you taken your meds lately?

Personal question, but...considering his behavior so far, I'm thinking it's kind of valid.

[8:54 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] without a high induced ramble, what is your reasoning for being here?
[8:54 PM] Rxxxxxx: And i like "chaos Magick" and im messing with the ideas in my meme-pool

More proof of 4chan influence.

[8:55 PM] Rxx: why are you here
[8:55 PM] Rxx: you sound like you don't take anything you're studying seriously
[8:56 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Chaote path. Spears and so forth. Correct?
[8:56 PM] Rxxxxxx: Well. I could write a novel. But someone invited me because. i thought i had a thoughtform. I was not sure. And i just hung out.

So...who did invite him, anyway?

[8:56 PM] Rxx: I'm open to investing my time into someone but why would i answer questions if you aren't gonna take things serriously
[8:56 PM] Rxxxxxx: Nope. Chaoist and a badass sigil yet to be crafted.

"Badass sigil", right. Okay, I'm beginning to understand the 'neckbeard' self-reference.

[8:56 PM] Rxxxxxx: Well. Its not gonna happen over night.
[8:57 PM] Nxxxxxxx: Chaos magician with no real understanding of sigil magic or how memetics might actually be employed. I mean... kek might be pleased with that but not in the way you think.
[8:57 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: You’ve asked questions, and given careless responses
[8:58 PM] Nxxxxxxx: I think this is just a kid stoned out of his mind and/or off their meds. Gonna wash my hands of it and go back to my coffee

Probably the wisest reaction.

[8:58 PM] Rxx: how do actual memetics work?
[8:58 PM] Rxxxxxx: Hmmm.... I think im mostly looking to get kicked or something. You are what you are and if not then so be it.

This is the aspect of trollthink I get the least. Why, why go anyplace with the goal of being kicked out? I've seen it on SL, I've seen it in real life, and I just don't get it, at all. What's the joy in being in a place, and being such a jerk that they refuse access to that place, based entirely on his behavior? Is it a bit of self-reinforcement, that whole "I'm trash and everyone knows it, and everyone's going to treat me like trash, so I'll treat everyone like trash first" line of thought? Because I don't understand it otherwise.

[8:59 PM] Rxx: i don't dislike you i just wish you took things more seriously
[8:59 PM] Rxxxxxx: But like. I came out of like nowhere yall need some better securities.

Seriously? That's your best answer? "I got in, so obviously your invite system is flawed"? That's so high up in the stupidsphere I'm losing brain cells just being at that altitude.

[8:59 PM] dxxx: well, if he wants to get kicked, anybody going to do him the favour?
[8:59 PM] Nxxxxxxx: The power of collective thought and entropy, basically.
[8:59 PM] Rxxxxxx: Please. Make it all badass!
[8:59 PM] Rxxxxxx: We can make a day of it?!

No. Don't be more stupid than you have been.

[9:00 PM] Cxxxxxx: You said someone invited you so like A, that's not nowhere. And b, whoever did speak up and claim this guy

Yeah, really. I'd like to know.

[9:00 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Chaote is the original term for what you're describing. Chaote individuals generally come trying to find psychic vampires. This isn't surprising or new. Just a fyi to everyone.
[9:00 PM] Hxxxx Gx: Who invited you, per chance :)?
[9:00 PM] Rxxxxxx: Humor is how cope. And im not usually funny.

You're not, and you haven't been, and the phrase should be "how I cope", but I guess you're too intoxicated to care right now.

[9:00 PM] Cxxxxxxx: You'll get someone like [Rxxxxxx] from time to time.
[9:00 PM] Rxxxxxx: Im not sure. This is odd hmm?
[9:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: THIS IS SOO COOL!!!!
[9:01 PM] Cxxxxxx: Am chaote
I mean he acts similar to the chaos magic group I'm in but that group is all memes and rarely real Magick talk
Bc.... Chaotes b crazy
[9:01 PM] dxxx: mostly you're boring
[9:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: I am crazy.

Here's the thing, and I say this having a couple RL, actual, medical diagnoses: "Crazy" is never an excuse. Mental illness is not a crutch we need to lean on, it's not a get-out-of-dissension free card anyone can whip out when things get rough. No one's going to buy that. No one's going to care.

[9:01 PM] Hxxxx Gx: Well, [using his real name, which doesn't take even ten seconds to track down], we're quite curious.
[9:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: I think.
[9:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: Oooooohhhhhh. Someone knows something!

Considering that less than a minute of Googling turns up his Twitter, his web page, his Reddit (yes, this idiot has a subReddit), and the three books on Amazon? It's not that hard, dude, you're not an arcane enigma.

[9:01 PM] Nxxxxxxx: As far as I know this isn't a closed server, all you need is the link so this so it's whatever. Always gonna get a few trolls here and there.
[9:02 PM] Cxxxxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] I don't think is trolling you
[9:02 PM] Cxxxxxxx: I just think he's dumb about his approach

I wouldn't be so sure. Any mention of 4chan-style behavior puts me on the alert, so 'troll' and 'dumb' are not mutually exclusive, here.

[9:02 PM] Rxxxxxx: Ok. Well. I have been studying...something. Since i was 17. I read a really awesome book. I blame 4chan for a lot but i saw /x/ as my online home. I learned and got my start there.

Called it. He is a 4chan troll.

[9:03 PM] Rxxxxxx: I stole a bunch of books from the web. Played with fire. And got burnt.
[9:03 PM] Nxxxxxxx: I think you're being a little too optimistic in this case, [Cxxx].
[9:03 PM] Rxx: maybe [Rxxxxxx] isn't a troll
[9:03 PM] Rxx: and is just really weird and stoned out of his mind
[9:03 PM] Hxxxx Gxx: So, [uses real name again], how'd you end up here?
[9:04 PM] Rxxxxxx: Im SUPER WEIRD.

That you may be, but that doesn't answer the question. How did super weird you end up in relatively banal here?

[9:04 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: Agrees with [Hxxxx Gx]
[9:04 PM] dxxx: on my server he'd be banned already
[9:04 PM] Nxxxxxxx: That's hardly an excuse to be an ill mannered [tw*t].
[9:04 PM] Hxxxx Gx: Alrighty folks, no need to be jittery back yeah?
[9:04 PM] dxxx: doesn't matter if he's a troll or just stupid
[9:04 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] [continues with real name], who invited you exactly?
[9:04 PM] Rxxxxxx: No i get a devious tickle from being an [***hole].

So, definition of troll, right there.

[9:04 PM] Nxxxxxxx: I'm sure you have many friends.
[9:05 PM] Rxxxxxx: None whatso ever
[9:05 PM] Rxxxxxx: Alive that is.

So, troll, self-identifed neckbeard, 4channer, states he's crazy, and now he's being weirdly threatening. This is not someone we want to hang around with.

[9:05 PM] Rxx: what
[9:05 PM] Rxxxxxx: I dont know who invited me. It might have been a server ad. Im not sure. But i got some ideas. And i am hella smart.

And that's what finally broke Ms. L:

[9:06 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: You are disrespectful, to members of this server. Id like to ask you to leave
[9:07 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: You have 1 min to exit on your own accord
[9:07 PM] Nxxxxxxx: This is why I drink lol
[9:07 PM] Rxxxxxx: Ok. Thats what i was looking for.
[9:07 PM] Rxxxxxx: Cyall. Thank you for your time.
[9:07 PM] Rxxxxxx: Stay blessed.
[9:08 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: He left
[9:08 PM] dxxx: thanks [Jxxxx]
[9:08 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: I'd still ban him. Is not convinced he won't be back
[9:09 PM] Nxxxxxxx: He has a twitter. Not gonna post it, [Nxxx]. But that's just special.

I'm not going to link it here, but part of his username there is "buddha jesus chaoist". So...egotistical, on top of everything else.

Ultimately, it's going to give all of us a slight complex for a while, watching for any other 4chan-inclined trolls to wander in and try to freak us out with how 'chaotic' and 'cooool' they are, but beyond that...Jerk arrived, jerk was plainly a jerk, jerk was bounced. End of jerk.

twelve o'clock at night, and the moon is full (part two)

Picking up where we left off...And I'm still pondering last entry's question: what on earth does he think 'charitable feeding' would prove?? I don't even have a place in my brain for that.

[8:20 PM] Rxx: Hopefully whatever he's publishing doesn't bring mass attention to vampires
[8:21 PM] Rxx: Lol

I tend to agree, but on the other hand, it's far easier to write lurid, sensational pieces that magnify how bats or surreal or just generally dangerous we are as a group. And, let's also be logical about things: collectors of Hummel figurines aren't known for murdering people. While no one I know in the real vamp community has, as far as I know, there are a great many "vampire murderers" out there. It doesn't go with the territory, but it feeds into the fear and disgust that many have when thinking of people who drink blood. Because obviously they can't also own a minivan and have kids and go to PTA meetings, by default they must be baby-eating Satanists who dress in black, cover their faces in white makeup, and sleep in coffins, right?

[8:22 PM] Rxxxxxx: [Axxxx Axxxxx] it might turn into a voice for the "occult" histories in modern day technology. Like magick has not died. Yall be vampires. And i think i understand chaos. The point is the furtherment of tolarance and support of metaphysical systems. Systems that help people FOR REAL real.

"Tolerance". And...maybe it's just me, but the best way to further tolerance and understanding of metaphysics is to present it rationally--not ask a bunch of strangers on the internet "So tell me, do you really, really, REALLY drink blood? Like for REAL real? Like, REALLY REALLY for real?" Because that just made him come off a complete lunatic.

[8:22 PM] Rxxxxxx: Like i have ideas for a occult universty. Or wellness centers. Not too sure
[8:23 PM] Rxx: What

I agree. What? I don't understand any of that.

[8:23 PM] Rxxxxxx: At least general education of the "out there" like how to live life and all that.
[8:23 PM] Rxxxxxx: Real important skills.
[8:23 PM] Nxxxxxxx: I'm not a sang so no, I don't, but there are many who do. Occult and vampires aren't always synonymous. Also many occultists aren't as open to sharing their studies and information, that's why grimoires are often coded and intentionally left incomplete

I tend to agree. Even old alchemy texts are written in code. Their writers expected a certain facility with the information, they weren't writing for everyone who just happened upon a tome.

[8:24 PM] dxxx: ehh, vamps are far less magical than you might expect

That too. Remember the minivans and the kids and the helping out with homework? Lot of real vamps do that on the daily.

[8:24 PM] Rxxxxxx: Well. Sharing is caring and i thinknit all should be written at least once.

I bet. Sarcasm fully intended.

[8:25 PM] Rxx: Id consider myself a magician
[8:25 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: Unless people know where the info is going, I don't know if you'd be able to get good interviews [Rxxxxxx]
[8:25 PM] Rxx: I'm not the greatest though
[8:25 PM] Rxxxxxx: Not just vamps. But like the "whole" spectrum.
[8:25 PM] Rxx: Does rev think we're mentally ill?

Maybe. Sounds like it, anyway.

[8:25 PM] Rxxxxxx: This interaction has been more than enough. I apreciate all the input i have gotten.
[8:26 PM] Nxxxxxxx: Vamps aren't always involved in the occult, so there's also that. I think you might have some misconceptions about what vampires are, including the types that exist.
[8:26 PM] diss: i get the impression that he thinks we're vampires and about to start sparkling
[8:26 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] this group is for support, if you have any questions about support that you'd like to get answered for yourself, please feel free to ask those questions instead.

Now there's a thought. He could have asked any number of questions about vampirism in general, how one 'knows' one is a vampire, where the current research is at...but no, he leapt directly into "am drunk wana voice" territory. Pitiful.

[8:27 PM] Hxxxx Gx: The association with vampires and occult magics is generally misinformation given people's opinions that they form through popculture nonsense. Many psi vampires like myself are long time practitioners but we're not vampires because of it and generally our energy work has very little to do with our natures as vampires.
[8:27 PM] Rxxxxxx: I bet i do!
[8:27 PM] Rxxxxxx: Not know much.

Now that I fervently believe.

[8:27 PM] Rxx: I'm open to most questions Aswell
[8:27 PM] Rxxxxxx: Cool
[8:28 PM] Nxxxxxxx: [B*tch] I might, gimme a lush bathbomb. I'll sparkle like you wouldn't believe. The beacons of gondor have been lit. shrug getting a weird vibe here so I think I'll let someone else handle that can of worms.

Totally not alone there. I think a lot of us were getting that vibe. (And the reason you're not seeing my name in these comments is because this entire drama mostly took place while I was off having dinner with family. Else I likely would have interjected.)

[8:28 PM] Hxxxx Gx: Also, I'm going to second [Axxxx Axxxxx]. We're a support group. We're not going to be the place to gather 'information' for a paper, a thesis, or anything. We're not lab rats to be studied. We have a desire to help those who are genuinely interested in the lives and natures of vampires and non-humans, donors and so on, but we're also going to maintain the safety of our community :). Which I'm sure you understand. Knowing this, I would like to request that you do not use any names or any information acquired here for any purpose outside of this discord, and if you would like to collect information for academic pursuit please DM [CX], the owner.

**THIS,** so VERY much this.

[8:28 PM] Rxxxxxx: Itl be like histories. Things that you would share with other people in your situation. In anything odd like this. Support is crucial.

We have a few books like that already. And we have more than a handful of people dedicated to finding out both the medical why behind this urge/need, as well as the psychological and mental issues surrounding it. Mr. R, he's not going to get very far figuring anything he writes will be new in its field.

[8:28 PM] dxxx: you sound rather excited to be here... maybe it'd be good to go read up a bit more on the publicly available sites (e.g. https://sphynxcatvp.nocturna.org/ ) and then return with questions?
[8:29 PM] Rxxxxxx: Cool. And yes. There would be identity protections and what not.
[8:30 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: [Rxxxxxx], yes [CX] would be the person to contact about anything academic for your uses. Just message her.
[8:30 PM] Hxxxx Gx: At this time we do not submit, accept, or wish to indulge in any form of study from this point on until official acceptance of such an idea is given by the discord's owner.

Which is a very good, very clear way to say no. I approve.

[8:31 PM] dxxx: [Rxxxxxx] you are way ahead of yourself. before anybody will agree to participate in any study you will have to show that you at least know what you are talking about. otherwise we're not interested

And to this point, he hasn't shown that he understands one single thing.

[8:31 PM] Jxxxx Lxxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] what is the intended purpose of your study?

As usual, bolding the name means they're a mod for the group, just like [CX] is the group owner.

[8:31 PM] Rxxxxxx: I Thank you for being as you are! And i am sorry that it came of but i am sort of having an uber neckbeard nerd moment. Im just happy to have been able to get this experience really.

And great, now we're an "experience" for him. Way to go right back to making us feel like sideshow freaks. Also, how is he defining "uber neckbeard nerd"? Because for me, that sounds really negative.

[8:32 PM] dxxx: [Rxxxxxx] you are also intruding into what is usually a rather private space
[8:33 PM] Rxxxxxx: Its mostly my personal occult practice. The more data the better. But there has been great disrespect felt, and i am not anyone really known. So it would be weird any other way than it is.
[8:33 PM] Rxxxxxx: So thank you.
[8:34 PM] Hxxxx Gx: Well given that vampires are not inherently anything related to the occult there's not much you can find there :smiley:

That's true enough. He's still coming off more akin to a donkey's rear section than to a thoughtful human entity, though.

Part three to come.

twelve o'clock at night, and the moon is full (part one)

While this is not a chat capture from an SL group, due to the nature of the group I'm following my personal ethics and anonymizing user names. Especially as this deals with a section of chat that deals with sensitive topics.

[7:58 PM] Rxxxxxx: Could i like. Interview one of you? Im drinking and want to voice chat with someone here. any takers?

Meet our protagonist, Mr. R, who at this point simply sounds drunk and tactlessly invasive. Here we go.

[7:58 PM] Rxxxxxx: So who here is a vampire?

Well, that's bald enough. Want to follow that up with cutting one of us and rubbing salt in the wound? Seriously, dude.

[7:59 PM] Rxxxxxx: Oh [sh*t]. Did not think that would go through.
[8:00 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Didn't think what would go through?
[8:00 PM] Rxxxxxx: Those msg i sent.

Then...why did he send them? I blame the alcohol, or the general stupid he's radiating.

[8:01 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Why didn't you think they would? Poor reception?
[8:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: Yup
[8:01 PM] Rxxxxxx: My signal is weak where i am until nighttime.

Still seems odd. Like, why even type something if you don't want people to read it...

[8:03 PM] Rxxxxxx: But yeah im really curious. Like with this whole phenomenon.

Um...what? We're a "phenomenon" now? How culturally insensitive, you boorish...I mean, how did he even get in here?

[8:03 PM] Cxxxxxxx: I unfortunately can't do a voice interview currently. My wife is sleeping. We're always happy to answer your questions within reason :slight_smile:
[8:04 PM] Rxxxxxx: Oh of course!
[8:04 PM] Nxxxxxxx: Can't now because I'm at work. No rest for the wicked, I guess. I usually don't do voice, I don't particularly like being recorded but I, too, can answer questions via text
[8:07 PM] Rxxxxxx: I total get that. respect. I do not mind corresponding in text or whatever really.
[8:09 PM] Rxxxxxx: Thank you for your words.

Yet...Mr. R started all this nonsense by asking people to voice with him.

[8:11 PM] Rxxxxxx: My connection will be in and out. So i apologize for any disturbance double msg may cause.
[8:13 PM] Cxxxxxxx: It's understandable :)
[8:13 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: I don't do interviews personally, but good luck with your ventures :blush:

So, the general reaction seems to be, thanks, but...no.

[8:13 PM] Rxxxxxx: Firstly. I am an [***hole] of the nth degree. But i hate dicks who [f*ck] with people who think differently. I truly feel that you believe that you are what you are. And that's interesting to me.

And yet, he approaches people in this way. "Hey im drunk lets chat". Yeah, no. Not gonna happen. And he's not making it any easier by making us feel like we're specimens to examine.

[8:14 PM] Rxxxxxx: But my main question. Is do any of you like LEGIT. No bs. Real talk. Consume blood into your stomach like food?
[8:15 PM] Rxxxxxx: Also do you treat it like a special treat. Or is it along the lines of "hmmm.... Some blood would taste good right about now"

Seriously? Google real vampirism, you'll learn more from that. Who is this loon?

[8:16 PM] Rxxxxxx: And then ultimately. Whos blood do you eat. Because that [sh*t] be dangerously risky.

Oh, great, he's one of those. There's a huge number of mistaken rumors about drinking blood--my own cousin, when I told her several years ago, immediately searched out several articles and earnestly wanted me to know that drinking human blood would not only give me cancer (false) and parasitically invasive worms (false unless I'm feeding on a known infected person, and then, usually not transmissible just by blood consumption) but would make me a schizophrenic (REALLY false, and seriously, where do people come up with these things??).

[8:17 PM] Rxxxxxx: I get that a lot of it is stereotypes. Myth. Rumors. Really big misunderstandings.

You say that, but you're still asking.

[8:18 PM] dxxx: well, one person's blood they drink is mine
[8:18 PM] Rxxxxxx: But. This shizzle is for SCIENCE. That is crazy [dxxx]
[8:18 PM] dxxx: nah, i just enjoy doing it
[8:18 PM] Rxxxxxx: I bet.

Is it just me? I'm hearing contempt oozing from those two words. Maybe I'm misinterpreting, but especially based on the earlier statements...he's just coming across as a major jerk.

[8:19 PM] Axxxx Axxxxx: [Rxxxxxx] so what is your project about? Where are you publishing it? I'd love to read it when you are finished.

Based on some research I did after this chat tied up (which took all of five minutes, by the way, just by searching the name I've redacted), he's written three books, they're all self-published electronically on Amazon, and they all have "Stupid" in the title. So based on that, I'd say his project is about nothing of interest, he's publishing on Amazon, and no, Ms. A would not like to read it at all.

[8:19 PM] Cxxxxxxx: Cultures have consumed blood for as long as recorded human history. We're all still here :)
[8:19 PM] Rxxxxxx: Like do you feel like charitable? Or is it like ? Its just weird. But like if its true. Then it proves SO MUCH.

"Charitable"? What the hell does that mean in this context? And believe me, we all get by now that Mr. R thinks it's weird and freakish and we're all weird freaks. Thanks for that. And also...what the hell does he think that proves? I don't understand that at all.

Part two when it arrives.

the collision of your kiss

The Crones Garden Main Store & Voodoo Moon Clan Swamps, the land said, coming in. Wait, is this a haunted house, or a Bloodlines clan sim? It looks more like a Bloodlines clan sim, but...I am endeavoring to put judgement aside, for the nonce. Onward I go.



After finding, and leaving, several clearly clan-only lands, I think I found the haunt. It was very, very loud with booming thunder and some sort of...deep base drone of some kind? No idea what it was.



That's my kind of welcome mat.



The art's a tad bit disturbing, as well...



Haunted TV, check...just when I had hopes that this was going to be a less tired haunt.



I'd say also, creepy clown, check, but this one's a clown doll...that's slightly different, and not as cliched.

Also very creepy.



Wau, some really disturbing framed art. Nicely done.

It's not a bad house, overall. I'd recommend setting sounds to minimal, because of the loud booming noises which become very repetitive, but...there are some very subtle squeaks and unearthly giggles that would be missed if that was done, so...I can't say one way or the other. I suppose it will all come down to how into loud drones and shaking metal sounds you are.

but I'm holding on for dear life, won't look down, won't open my eyes

We have invented a vampire computer. Is this a good thing?

[Zone] Toa the Veteran@takimeta2: guys does grammar still?

Wait, what?

[Zone] Lymille Trèflebleu@tiwiztiti: (Damn ***holes, U will recognize U when reading this : people help you then you threw them off your party ? poor ill mind, i'm sure U have no friends IRL)

And, in a conversational swerve...Just to explain this for folks who don't know--there are some really poor gamers who invite folks to go dungeon-delving with them, then, right as they reach the final room but after the final boss has been slain, they kick everyone off the team so they'll be the only one to open the chest. I don't know why they do this--it won't increase their chances of getting rare drops from the end chest, because that's completely random, so I just chalk it up to general wastes of oxygen being wastes of oxygen.

[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: Grammar no
[Zone] Blackie Bravo@lesple: no, it are died

.......

No, "it are died"? IT ARE DIED??? Dear gods and little fishes.

Maybe they're right. Maybe grammar doesn't still. Weep for the future, y'all.

[Zone] Toa the Veteran@takimeta2: WAT WAIIII

Now, did you mean "What way?" or "Wait, what?" Either way, that's a fractured statement, Toa.

[Zone] Illeul@naughtnicht27: Handels Wateredhavian Hemd

And I have zero idea what you're trying to say, Illeul.

[Zone] Redbrimstone@redbrimstone3: bolje da nema

Nema bolje da ne bude ono što? Anyway, moving on.

[Zone] Jimmy@hanooka: Did they fix SP Already?
[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: What's SP
[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: Skill Points

What Grayce sai...waiiiit a minute. How come you're asking what SP is if you're the one giving the answer?!?

[Zone] Blackie Bravo@lesple: spell points

Nope.

[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: Suggestive Phrophecies

Nope, but entertaining.

[Zone] Ghorbash Iron Hand@todi55: prevrni kamen,naci ces nekoga sa balkana

Kaj je kamen nacist? I'm so ccofused.

[Zone] Flinx@flinx66: Spell Plague Dungeon

That'd be SPD, and nope.

[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: Silent Phone

That makes no sense.

[Zone] Grayce@Audentia2: Sucky people

Well, they are definitely a part of Neverwinter--people that suck are part of virtually any online gaming experience--but again, nope.

[Zone] Guardian@drogethxundussen: Bull to what anyone says: Professional Prophets don't make good money in the modern world!

It really depends on how you're billing yourself. Take a religious angle, you can generally make decent money bilking the unwary. If you're reasonably honest, though, "professionally" predicting the future--unless you're working the stock market--is going to be a moderately funded hobby, at best.

[Zone] Valdrin Avrymtor@poriah: only mormons can predict the future :l

How...does that work? Mormons are known for predicting the future? Since when?

[Zone] Guardian@drogethxundussen: Now our computers do it. -_- Taking all the jobs man!
[Zone] Black As Irish@blackirish29112: yes they do

Computers can't predict the future. They use predictive algorithms. The most you can get out of any computer--at least so far--is what you put in, so if you put in really good, amazing things, then it has a reasonable surety of getting it right most of the time...maybe.

But again, it's all based on the algorithms involved.

I think what we've basically had is a general failure to translate properly.



And when we're talking English to English, that's really sad.

as all my darkness gathers in

Have some haunted houses in real life, famous authors in costume, and, if you like suspense but not gore, twenty-five of the most suspenseful films ever made.

Because Halloween never lasts long enough, frankly.

Every now and again, I still hear words from on high...

turning radius: Hey, whats up?
turning radius: You on?
turning radius: Are you still sleeping never?

So, interesting story with that...kind of yes, kind of no? It's odd. But in the main, my apologies, Lord--I was on, but I was killing spiders, skeletons, and werewolves in Neverwinter. Sorry?

Words of wisdom from a mountain? I've got that.

In the meantime, if you'd seen or heard of the latest Miss Universe pageant's...unusual...take on national costumes, I've dug up part of the full country line-up. You can find a few more here, and here, if you're really interested. For me personally, I'm not sure I'd honestly be able to pick out more than five--maybe five--that are even tenuously related to the national costumes of their countries, and top of that limited list is Miss Japan (Yukimi Matsuo) and Miss Korea (Yumi Kim). And even those aren't exact.

The SLebrity Sim is currently hosting the SLebrity City Holiday Fair. What's so unique about this is that all the things you'll find there are transferable as gifts. Now, that's a neat holiday concept.

[18:46] Santi Knight (vxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx): booo
[18:46] Santi Knight (vxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx): i need your blood
[18:58] Emilly Orr wanders back to the keys and scoffs.
[18:58] Emilly Orr: You're kidding, right? No biting. Go 'way now.
[18:59] Santi Knight (vxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx): jajja ok

Some days people irritate me. Days like this, though, I just loathe them all in general.

smirking between dignified sips

Seriously, at this point, why bother wearing pants at all?

So, I've gotten involved in a few new groups. And, for the most part, I'm just trying to keep a (fairly) low profile, until I get the feel of the group chat. Sometimes, my best intentions don't matter, because I'm not the one making trouble.

[00:13] dxxx Sxxxxx: [cxxxx] i have warned you onve before about that disrespect and ridicule
[00:13] dxxx Sxxxxx: we do not allow it here
[00:14] dxxx Sxxxxx: group moderator isues warning to cxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx

Now, in this group, this is fairly standard. There are several group moderators, so there's usually one in the chat at any given time. They're very strict about keeping conversation free of personal insults, rude language, and discussion of products and games other companies make. Most of the time, this renders chat fairly civilized.

[00:15] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): dam

I'm also stating that I'm keeping the display name, if not the actual avatar name, of this fellow intact. For reasons that will become manifestly clear later.

[00:18] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): hmm
[00:18] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): no
[00:18] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i dont run from noone

Now, keep in mind: this literally came out of nowhere. The moderator online at the time was disciplining another group member, not this so-called "Vampire From Hell". So his reaction was unexpected and confusing.

[00:18] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i know they say your god
[00:18] Sxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: 0.0
[00:18] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): but
[00:18] dxxx Sxxxxx: excuse me?
[00:18] Emilly Orr is confused
[00:19] Fxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: WTH

So say we all. But Sudden Confrontation Man had more to say.

[00:19] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): dam i rached something
[00:19] dxxx Sxxxxx looks outside for full moon...
[00:19] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): this time
[00:19] Sxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: do people ever check what box they are typing in? lol
[00:19] Emilly Orr: Define "rached"
[00:19] Emilly Orr: And not usually

I looked it up. The only thing Google tossed me even vaguely relevant was from the Urban Dictionary, of course. And it didn't seem to make any sense in this context. "Rached" being something that is ugly, disgusting or gross, or "just plain sad". So "dam I rached something"...means...he uglied it up, somehow? Or...something like that?

What?

[00:19] Txxxxxxxxxx: [sxxxx]...um ar eyou by any chance on a phone ?? because your IMs are crossing over
[00:19] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): definealone
[00:20] Emilly Orr: 0.o
[00:20] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): soemily is one i need to talk to
[00:20] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: lucky her
[00:20] Sxxxxxxxx: how about actually talking to her and not us lol

I began to have premonitions that this conversation was going to go more pear-shaped than I thought.

[00:21] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): ok lets talk
[00:21] Sxxxxxxxx giggles
[00:21] Emilly Orr pulls the profile and raises an eyebrow.
[00:21] Emilly Orr: On second thought, don't bother.

Why did I say that? Because this is his SL bio:

LOOKING FOR TRUE LOVE IF YOUR A LIAR DECEITFUL DONT BOTHER IM DONE WITH FAKES AND PEOPLE DONT KNOW WHAT LOVE MEANS


HELLION KING OF HELl

LIFE BECOMES DEATH, DEATH BECOMES LIFE WHEN I DRINK YOUR BLOOD!!!!!!

FEEL FREE TO MSG ME IF YOU ILL WILL WHATS THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN BE BITTEN LOL

I MAY BITE AND CLAIM YOUR SOUL but i may fall in love with you to hehe kidding

WATCH YOUR ASS CAUSE YOUR STILL NOT PROTECTED FROM BITES AND SOUL POSSESSION

I've left everything intact as I saw it on the grid, deranged spacing, EXTREME CAPS and all. I had strong, strong reservations about dealing further with this person.

[00:21] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): your call
[00:22] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: omg...i try to keep this chat open for info and to learn...but there is so much crap anymore...it isn't dating service...a club hangout
[00:22] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: wtf
[00:23] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): im not hear to date
[00:23] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: are you fishing or hunting?
[00:23] dxxxx Sxxxx: o.0
[00:23] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): imhar fo
....
What. The hell. Does that. Even mean? "Imhar fo"? Did he mean "I'm here for--"? And if so, what was he here for??

And now we had two confrontative souls. Wonderful.

[00:24] dxxxx Sxxxx: this is a community chat room

Which is a good point, actually, though it's one this particular mod has to make at least twice a week, it seems. It is a wide, diverse community, linked only by our desire to make Lindens and have fun doing it. With that as the only solid connecting factor, yeah, conversation ranges wildly.

But--me being me--I thought I should answer that question as if it were to me, because I was feeling a little irked over being singled out by the VFH.

[00:24] Emilly Orr: Me? Fishing, until/unless a good coin hunt pops up.
[00:24] Fxxxxxxxxxxx: lol
[00:24] dxxxx Sxxxx: chat is not required to be fish or coin hunt related
[00:24] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: i wasn't referring to you Emily

Always good to know.

[00:24] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): im actually for something else
[00:24] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx)): actually
[00:24] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: fine
[00:25] Emilly Orr: Okay.
[00:25] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: but to me...and several other people i know...it is completely out of hand anymore
[00:25] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): luaim sorry
[00:25] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): about that
[00:25] Txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: this group has over 18 thousand members.
[00:26] Pxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx hugs the chat box "its like a circus that i dont have to pay to get into"
[00:26] Lxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: circus on freakin meth

Well...opinions vary, but...yeah, sometimes.

But, with much trepidation, I thought nothing was going to get done unless I tackled the VFH in IMs. So off I went to do that.

[00:26] Emilly Orr: All right, so...if for no other reason than to prevent the rising tide of irritation in the chat...What *are* you here for?
[00:26] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): answers
[00:27] Emilly Orr: To?
[00:27] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx)): i was told i could rachou
[00:27] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): hears thenote
[00:27] Emilly Orr: Define "rachou"
[00:28] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i was told it be hostil
[00:28] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): at first
[00:28] Emilly Orr: Not hostile, just don't understand what you mean.

And I really, really didn't. I had no clue what he was on about.

[00:28] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): im hear to find answers and to hel you
[00:29] Emilly Orr: 1., Answers to what, and 2. help me how?
[00:29] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): well i was told you would tell me
[00:29] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): when i got here
[00:30] Emilly Orr: I don't know you. Did someone mention my name?
[00:30] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx)): a high ranking officer in past town
[00:30] Emilly Orr: Uh-huh...
[00:31] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): your name was given tome
[00:31] Emilly Orr: Who are you again?
[00:32] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): im hellio
[00:32] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): hellio
[00:32] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): hellion

Man can't even spell his own name. I didn't understand any of this.

[00:32] Emilly Orr: No no no, I mean...I haven't RPed anywhere in years, I'm not in Bloodlines, so really, I have no clue here. What are you after?
[00:33] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i was told you say that
[00:33] Emilly Orr sighs.
[00:34] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): said you was at war aed need help
[00:34] Emilly Orr: At war with whom, and need help from whom, with what?
[00:34] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i dont know ask them
[00:35] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): im repeating
[00:35] Emilly Orr: Okay, and 'they' would be...?
[00:35] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): they toldme to tell you they was your queen

I wracked my brain. The only queen I've ever had was a long time ago, in an rp sim far far away, and I'm not talking to her anymore, anyway. Beyond that, I had no idea who he might mean.

[00:36] Emilly Orr: If she was queen of the Unseelie court, not interested.
[00:36] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): no
[00:37] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): queen of hell
[00:37] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): the one that gives yo fire
[00:37] Emilly Orr: Don't have a queen of hell. At least, not one I've ever met.

Which, as far as I know, is still true. This was so very, very baffling.

Meanwhile, in the main chat...

[00:34] LadyWxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: wow so many ppl with nice pleasant atitudes wow so amazing
[00:34] Rxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: yeah somebody please pass the happy pills :)
[00:35] LadyWxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: according to the mods here its been a ful moon for 2 weeks now
[00:35] LadyWxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: wow im amazed at the briliance in here
[00:35] dxxx Sxxxx: o.0

Oh, the sarcasm...but this becomes relevant later. Just keep in mind that "LadyW" was in the chat.

[00:37] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): you might want to look
[00:38] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): youhave one
[00:38] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): that how i was sent
[00:39] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): lets fire rise
[00:39] Emilly Orr: If you say so.
[00:40] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): are you lettingme threw
[00:40] Emilly Orr: I don't know who you are!
[00:41] Emilly Orr: I don't know who you're talking about, I don't understand the war references, I'm not IN any court...There's a lot of confusion here, and it's all coming from you.
[00:42] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): well im used to hate
[00:42] Emilly Orr: There's no hate. I just don't understand.
[00:42] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx)): ihave worked with most
[00:42] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i was told to talk to o you
[00:42] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): by queen
[00:43] Emilly Orr: So how's that working out for you?

I will own, I was getting a touch frustrated at this point.

[00:43] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): well
[00:43] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): goo
[00:43] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): good
[00:43] Emilly Orr: Okay.
[00:44] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): looks like here two opeions
[00:44] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): youkillme
[00:44] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): ori kill you
[00:44] Emilly Orr: ....
[00:45] Emilly Orr: Where did killing come into this?

My brain. I really thought brain cells were starting to actively die at this point. I had no reference for any of this, and the VFH was NOT helping.

[00:45] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i was told you like to fight
[00:45] Emilly Orr: Are you sure you're talking to the right Emilly?
[00:45] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i want to do things peacefulffy
[00:46] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): if they told me right
[00:46] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): yes
[00:47] Emilly Orr: I don't like to fight.
[00:47] Emilly Orr: More to the point, I don't fight well.
[00:47] Emilly Orr: Though I do tend towards the durable.

Which has always been true, in rp at large. I can be injured, I have been injured, and I'm sure I could be killed. That it hasn't happened yet is mostly luck, not my fighting skill. Because I have none.

[00:47] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): youknow
[00:48] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i never nerber been beatien
[00:48] Emilly Orr: So who, exactly, told you I was this aggressive hellspawn who needed help with some mysterious war?
[00:48] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): someone yu know
[00:48] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): queen
[00:49] Emilly Orr: Name.
[00:49] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): well
[00:49] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): she said was mom
[00:49] Emilly Orr: I don't have a mother in SL.
[00:50] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): are you sure
[00:50] Emilly Orr: Dead sure.
[00:50] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): iits not a title
[00:50] Emilly Orr: Never had one. Never had an SL family in any way.

Which, again, is true. I've had, and in some cases hope I still have, very dear friends, but that's different. I've had loves, but while that makes them family, in a sense, that also makes them close enough to me that they're likely going to meet RL family at one point or another--or already have.

In none of these cases have I ever, not even once, called any woman on SL "mother". It's never happened.

[00:50] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): well she seemed to know you
[00:50] Emilly Orr: Name.
[00:52] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i have given you much and yonot given me anthhing yet
[00:52] Emilly Orr: You haven't given me a single verifiable fact, just posturing.
[00:52] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i ihave gave you that
[00:53] Emilly Orr: Yes, yes you have. Lots of vague pronouncements, lots of posturing, lots of 'you know' and 'this will happen'.
[00:53] Emilly Orr: And you know what? I don't *have* to keep pressing for more information from you.
[00:53] Emilly Orr: You don't want to tell me who she is, fine. My life goes on. No gains, no losses, I'm in the same place as I was before we started.
[00:54] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): but like you
[00:55] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i wont for noten
[00:55] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): you want it
[00:55] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): ill give it to you
[00:55] Emilly Orr: You started this conversation. I'm just playing along.
[00:55] Emilly Orr: I'm still convinced you're looking for a one-L Emily.

Meanwhile, in the main group chat...

[00:58] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): who is lady emily

Seriously?

[00:57] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): hmm
[00:59] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): i think i found out who
[01:00] Emilly Orr: Oh?
[01:01] HELLION Vampire From Hell (sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hxxxxxxx): ilook for [LadyWxxxxx]
[01:01] Emilly Orr: Good luck.

LadyW, wherever you are, I hope you got more from the VFH than I did. And that he made whatever sense he was planning to make, regarding the war, your hellish queen-mother, and whatever else he was blathering on about.

Me, I'm still trying to ponder how he confused "Emilly Orr" with "LadyWxxxxx Rxxxxxxx". They're not even spelled the same!

SL is deeply odd at times.

you're a tough little tadpole to love

This is the Face of Fear.

Wearing hair, also, utterly failed to help the Face of Fear.

To that end, though, TRUTH is having a hair sale, until May 3rd (which is why I linked the Face of Fear). Good luck getting in--the sim crashed at least twice just due to the total insane tonnage of women on the grid fighting to get in, the lag is unreal, frequently the sim next door maxes out just from people pressed against the invisible Wall of No, and just to add to all the joy, a lot of the avatars in there aren't actually buying anything, they're just camping. For reasons I do not have it in me to understand, but which are frustrating beyond all reason.

[15:19] Gxxxxxxx Xxxxxxxxxxx: Pardon but as a public service announcement to the ladies I had a rather pushy noob bug me repeatedly with

[15:02] rxxxxxxx: hello
[15:03] rxxxxxxx: wanna make-out?

[15:19] Gxxxxxxx Xxxxxxxxxxx: ask me that, so I sucked a passing kraken out of the skies of middlesea and hit him with it after he failed to get the message and set him north towards winterfell :)

This does seem to be a novel way to deal with unwanted amorous attentions.

[15:19] Gxxxxxxx Xxxxxxxxxxx: you might want to avoid on sight if you don't have anything heavy to hit and eject him with as he seems quite blind
[15:20] Bxxx Gxxxxxxxxx: Thank you, Mr Xxxxxxxxxxx!
[15:22] Bxxx Pxxxxxxx: Were you in middlesea at the time?
[15:22] Emilly Orr is quite fond of your response, though.
[15:23] Dxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: I take it you did not want to make out?
[15:23] Gxxxx Bxxxxx: Say it with krakens. Always the best way.

Indeed. Tentacles really can't be misinterpreted as a friendly greeting if they shotput you across the sim.

(from the events album; chattering at the gathered New Babbageans...Babbage-ites? Babbagelings?) at the Aether Salon.)

So...the Aether Salon happened! And I didn't die! Yay for not dying.

(from the events album; taking a few moments to relax and calm in Custard Developments)

Let me explain that, for benefit of people not me.

Starting with the loss of my last SL job, and dovetailing annoyingly neatly into the last SL relationship that vanished into disturbing ether, I've been pulling back from the grid. My friends know this better than anyone--apart from folks I talk with on the CaleCraft server, and occasional chatter in various groups (occasionally including ISC), I've talked to barely anyone I know in at least a year, if not more than. I won't say "crippling social anxiety" is the descriptive I'm going for, here, but I'm a self-made hermit at this point. Not only do I rarely leave my skybox, except to shop (much of which is done silently), but I rarely want to leave, for any reason. It's in large parts equal combinations of depression and simple grieving; some losses run deep. But it hasn't stopped me detaching so much from people who care for me, and whom I care for, that when I see them pop online, there are times I disconnect from the grid just on general principle. (Not because I'm trying to avoid anyone; more because I just don't want to pretend to be giddy and happy and well-adjusted if I'm not feeling those things on any given day.)

So...this was an opportunity in two very real senses: one, to share some of my views on steamwave with the community at large, and two, actually get out there and talk to people. Both were rather terrifying.

(from the events album; taking a few moments to relax and calm in Custard Developments)

But as you can read along in the transcript from the Salon, it didn't go at all badly. Behind the scenes, of course, I was terrified, I was nervous beyond all dreams, I was thoroughly convinced this would be a tragedy of epic Shakespearean proportions, and I was coming off of two weeks of intense stress, insomnia, and pain issues at home, so...to say I wasn't in the best mental or emotional state to take this on is, again, a nigh psychotic understatement.

But it went well. More to the point, because becoming a presenter meant joining the group, I discovered I'd actually like to make more of these things. They are a genial, affable, respectful crowd of Steamlanders, and I both thank them for attending my spate of babbling disguised as educated opinion, and of giving me really great questions to answer after. And according to the Baron, we managed a fairly decent turn-out during the SLRFL Steamlands pub crawl, so...I consider that a success as well.

All in all, I'm actually pleased with how it turned out, and I didn't expect to be, which was a rather refreshing change.

(Also, the last two pictures are from the upper reaches of the Custard Developments sim, above the Oroborus Clockwork Lounge. Do go see, it's a fascinating build.)

Bizarre conversation from a friend:

[6:30:08 PM] Axxxxxxxx Rxxxxx: just got a second "you're not a vampire, i've got the hud and it tells me so" conversation
[6:30:53 PM] Emilly Orr: ....
[6:30:55 PM] Emilly Orr facepalms
[6:31:07 PM] Emilly Orr: Yep. People still stupid on SL.
[6:31:15 PM] Axxxxxxxx Rxxxxx: yep
[6:31:39 PM] Axxxxxxxx Rxxxxx: guy's like "Oh, you're not? Would you like to be?"

Yeah, see, for anyone wondering why I posted that little excerpt? Because you can be a vampire without an inane HUD telling you you are. That's the freedom of roleplay--claim it, it's yours, play it right, people will play with you. They don't need HUDS and special blood-draining figures and bite protocols to actually be someone, they can just be that someone.

Personally, if you need a HUD to tell you what you are or aren't, you're deficient in imagination anyway. Live a little. Throw the HUD away. Find out what you want to be. I guarantee you it doesn't involve an over-scripted, over-programmed multi-level-marketing device.