dearly beloved, for your entertainment

It has been a long, strange year.

Technically, it's past Yule, technically, it's the 25th, but since we just filled and hung stockings today, I think I'm allowed.

I think, as much as I can say there were lows, and some of them staggering lows, overall, I'm not displeased with how the year is ending. We've had successes, and I think some good ones, in RL and SL. We haven't gotten COVID. We're still alive and rattling around. We may have a permanent low bar set at this point, but I'm far from it.

So here's hoping you are, too, and that things are at least tolerable, if not stellar. Now is the time of sleeping; the last of the harvest is in, the bulk of the gatherings to dispense the remaining fresh foods are past; now we seek shelter, and dress warm, and wait for spring.

And good health and happiness to us all in the year to come. Merry Yule.


(No, I don't know why all the picture links are broken. Again. I'll work on it, but this is like the fifth time in as many months, I may take up the offer of a friend for him to host the blog under his Wordpress package...which Blogger, well, isn't, but we do what we must.)

Fallen Gods is celebrating their 14th anniversary party today!

I know, I know, I've pitifully neglected the blog...everything sort of exploded on two fronts and I didn't deal well. And because I want this out more than I want everything to be framed, we're just going with raw shots, but I figure those who know why will understand.



So this is all taking place at the twelve-hour 14th anniversary of Fallen Gods, in Selidor. It started at eleven, and it's going strong, and likely will until it ends.



That's the way these things go.



This is a shot of the underside of the dance floor. It's literally just sitting on top of the Anniversary market.



Sweet little Clover abandoning her normal Tiny form for an actual Fallen Gods Petite, with Fallen Gods skin. So cool.



Alia felt Daveosaurus was cheating on 'must wear a Fallen Gods skin' for the first contest...



But my gods, this whole set up was so well-done. It was hysterical.



And then I had to leave, sadly. But this party is going to rage on all day, so if you want to come, come on down! Dress your best, dress your weirdest, come to party, and embrace fourteen years of Alia creating on the grid!

the longest night of the year

It is the shortest day. It will be the longest night. There will be feasting and celebrations, remembrance of the seasons that came before, a sparkling tide of good wishes to carry us through the darkness and into the seasons ahead. Bonfires will be lit this night, not for fertility and merriment, but for warmth. Hot mulled wines will be served, hot spiced ciders from this year's harvests, because tomorrow will begin the fortifications against winter's deep chill.

Today is the winter solstice. Today is Yule.

I admit, I'm something of a cobble, religiously. While most of my practice now does center on Ásatrú, I began the journey in Celtic Wicca--and, though most of my holidays are Ásatrú placements on the year, Beltane, Samhain and Yule remain the mix of old and new. This is partially because, even though everyone in my family's social circle, growing up, proclaimed Christianity, and taught their children Christianity, we also had touches of that Celtic mysticism. We were an extended Christian family that lit the Balefires in June. We were a Christian family who knew the veil thinned in October, who celebrated the longest night. Looking back on it now, as an adult, I realize that this was very odd for most Americans, but for my cousins and I, this was what everyone did, because everyone around us did these things.

So for me, December 21st means Yule, means staying up and celebrating until the light returns, means keeping the lights burning so that the sun remembers to return. And from a purely scientific perspective, this is a ludicrous idea, and scientifically, we know this. But there are a lot of bizarre religious beliefs. Hindus believe the universe was sung into being by a multi-armed entity. Buddhists believe the universe is a sleeping god's dream. Ásatrúar believe the universe was licked out of deep-frozen ice by a space cow. So really, no one who proclaims any faith has a leg to stand on where physics and reality are concerned.



But we still have Yule. The shortest day, the longest night. The Oak King, old and fading, giving way for the Holly King, young and vibrant, to accompany the Goddess through the dormant months. (Even in this, my family's practices differed from the norm, as for many Wiccans the Oak King is already full in his power at the Summer Solstice, and the Holly King is in full evergreen blush at the Winter Solstice. But for us, the Oak King takes over at Beltane, and the Holly King takes over at Yule.) Winter, after all, is not solely a season of death and sleeping, but of possibilities germinating, of new growth to come, ruminations, contemplations, the snap of cold to bring the sap to the surface. After all, there are still harvests that happen in winter--ice wines, maple syrups, a wide variety of greens can still grow through the winter. Carrots, turnips and radishes can still be grown, though it is rare to get them to harvest's end in a survivable form. And animals during this time, raised for meat, were traditionally slaughtered in the winter, so that the cold would keep the rot away until the meats could be properly dressed, smoked or dried in preparation of the cold to come.



So merry Wintertide to all, whatever your flavor of celebration is, and may the coming year be bright and bursting with good things. Here's to the bright dawn to come!

keep the bright lights burning

Lest the last post constitute my entire contribution for the 21st, let me correct that impression. Because it is a holiday for some of us.

This year, things are quiet, and somewhat spare, but we are together, and I am finding the little things have meaning. Before the point of actual solstice, we made sure that candles were lit in all directions, to guard against the shadows to come. We will have a small feast, we will play games, we will watch amusing and diverting things, and this is the one time during the year I am allowed more than one cup of coffee, so anyone who knows me knows how much that thrills me.

(I should point out, for those who don't know me, this is two ounces less than my everyday, standard coffee cup. And because we use a cold-brew system, that makes stronger coffee overall, I use between four and six ounces of coffee IN that mug (the rest being ice and cream, because yes, I am THAT person. Just for comparison, so y'all know we're not talking diner-style, 6-ounce coffee mugs.)



So tonight, for those of us who celebrate such, I wish your lights burn bright, your hearts burn brighter, and there is more happiness than sorrow, more contentment than bitterness, more peace than strife. Tomorrow morning, when the sun finally returns, we will go out into the crisp, chill blue, and celebrate that as well.

Then we will all go back inside and collapse for the post-Yule coma. As is tradition.

your heart is beating, alive and breathing

Second Life is going to get twenty-four hour days soon? I can't decide how I feel about this. On the one hand, it would allow greater flexibility for photography in estate time, but on the other, I have a lot of memories tied in with that peculiar, four-hour "day". We'll see how it goes, I guess.

Also, I wanted to bring this up, even though it's from a few months back:

[17:47] Lynn Mimistrobell: (Saved Fri Jul 21 10:38 )En Garde pistes are breaking all over the grid, and the creator has left SL so they cannot be fixed. And I am told that if you take them up, you cannot even rez them again.

Near as I can figure, En Garde as a game system works because each individual game station hooks up with a server (in-world or out of world, doesn't really matter in this context), so that scores and such can be saved when players log in. Beyond that, I don't really think there's a need for server-side activity; it just seems to be to score high scores and player names.

And in (somewhat) bigger news, Sakura is celebrating ten years on the grid!



All day long, off and on, parties in Sakura or Bellefleurs, depending on where everything ends up. The lineup we have so far:

10:30am - 12:00PM
Watt Whitfield DJ Dance at the Sakura Birthday Bash

Please join Sakura VIP Watt Whitfield, renaissance man and photographer of the Per Lens series, playing a mix of 70s Rock plus surprises.

12:00 - 1:00 pm
Corwyn Allen plays at Sakura's 10th birthday bash!

Corwyn is a folk singer and guitarist having performed in RL for more years than he cares to think about. He performs a varied and sometimes eclectic mix of American, Irish, Scottish, and English folk music, both traditional and modern.

1:00 - 2:00pm
Dee Wells' 'DeeJ Dance' at the Sakura Birthday Bash

Dee is a dear friend of Sakura. Her intelligent, thought-provoking and at times irreverent musical choices will make the hour go fast! You can follow sets and Chamber Three events, as well as special events at the Quayside Theatre. Music and sarcasm in the key of Dee: ask at the event!

2:00pm - 3:30pm
Dance with DJ Dancer and Sakura Hostess Rosamund

Please welcome Sakura's new dancer and hostess, Rosamund from Netherlands, and formally the principal dancer and manager of the Bascom Dance Club. Rose will be our DJ from 2PM, bringing her eclectic blend of music, and her kind and gentle manner.

5:00 - 6:00pm
DJ Bear Dance at the Sakura Birthday Bash

Bear is an old and dear friend of the girls at Sakura. He plays Oldies (50's through 80's), Jazz, Big Band, Smooth Jazz, and romantic songs. Bear is available for clubs, weddings and all private functions.

6:00 - 7:30pm
Erehwon Texeira DJ Dance at the Sakura Birthday Bash

Erehwon is a Sakura Hostess, and nobody does drinks like Ereh. She also runs the Coffee and Pop set at the Texeira Coffee House flagship location in beautiful Jadida Mondrago! Come by for the latest and greatest in Dreampop, Power Pop, Indie, Alt, Shoegaze and more! Did I mention there'll be coffee? Only the best coffee this side of the Mediterranean!

7:30pm - 8:30pm
Mavenn Live

"...A vocalist fast becoming one of the Second Life's more daring chanteuses...this lady simmers with emotion almost like a slow burn as the she continues to showcase elegance...Mavenn negotiates her way through jazz, blues, country and rock with soulful confidence and gives notice that her vocal prowess is on the rise and is easy to be mesmerized and excited by."

8:30 - 9:30pm
DJ Maddox Dance at the Sakura Birthday Bash

Maddie L has been a DJ for six years. She loves to spin, be it for one person, or twenty people. Doesn't matter who listens, so long as she gets to play! She can usually be heard at Bellefleurs on a Thursday night, and at either of Doc Avalon's places.

10:00pm - midnight
Nellie Bly's Performance Art, "Van Here Halewijn" ("From Lord Halewijn")

A Courtesan and Poetess from Netherlands, Nellie reads in SL from her own sensuous and erotic stories and poetry, as well as that of other writers from around the world, exclusively at Sakura. Tonight's live act will be a bit of Dutch folklore about a nobleman who kills women, and sirens who will lure men onto the rocks, if you're not careful.

All times listed are for SLT. And keep in mind, Sakura House has a public calendar of events and happenings now! So mark your calendars and come party with us!

on the seventh day I rest for a minute or two

(The below photographs all come from the "Passage of Time" exhibit at SL10B in Pizzazz. Part one and part two, for your reading pleasure.)

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

With 2009 came new challenges; namely, a system of 'rewarding' new premium accounts that I still hear complaints about to this day. Oh, granted, the occasional furniture or adornment gift that wanders towards premium accounts, the ability to buy and sell virtual land, and the premium-only sandboxen; these are all fun things, and--at least where the sandboxen are concerned--potentially invaluable to premium builders.

No, where the hitch seems to be is with the Lindenhomes. In essence, what the Lab has done is remade their "first land" proviso with a shocking difference, by giving each new premium account holder the ability to pick a "neighborhood", and subsequently receive--"free of charge"--a 512 parcel of land, complete with home and furnishings. Home and furnishings, I might add, that that premium account-holder cannot modify, retexture, or reconfigure in any way. It is theirs and not-theirs, in the same instance. It exists as a possession and it is never given away. Paradox? Yes, with each house that is offered.

I suppose, if the Lindens' intent is to quickly shunt new premium accounts towards tier fees and land ownership, simply because the Lindenhomes is question are so bland and utilitarian, then I suppose they work? So...yay for that?

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I admit, I stood in front of this placard for a very long time. "Then in August, the Emerald viewer was in trouble..." This makes it sound as if it was purely a software issue, and not a deliberate violation of trust. I'm not going to turn this into another Emerald diatribe, but really, even within a commemorative event array, that single toss-off line does not sit well with me...nor, I would suspect, with any of the former users of Emerald who felt profoundly victimized by the developers' bad behavior.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

This was another difficult placard to cover. I'm still not entirely comfortable with mesh, if only because I like to be seen as clothed when I go shopping. But the other issues that this particular sign mentions were both extraordinarily problematic at the time. As it turns out, looking back on these events, web profiles have turned out to be minimally non-invasive, though they still have features I'm not fond of using.

But the closing of the Teen Grid was a profound violation for many of us. First, because Claudia Linden, when asked, said it would never happen, but also because it's still such an appallingly bad idea. Intellectually, I realize there's no difference between someone I don't know who's thirty behind the screens, and someone I don't know who's seventeen; but emotionally, I stopped dating at all past the closure of Teen Grid. I do not want to play in mature ways with people I can't trust to be at least eighteen. It may be a minimal standard, but it's mine and I'm by damn clinging to it.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

And here's another controversy that's still raging. There are many separate groups in SL, on many levels; at any given time, there's always someone new to embrace or disdain, but even within these cliques and sub-structures, there's a fluidity that comes from all playing in the same space, with the same tools.

The "Resident" last name--which, to be honest, doesn't even exist; it's a holdover to provide two distinct names under Legacy viewers--was the first brutal social distinction in SL. Within days of the announcement, anyone who didn't have a last name was almost universally dealt supercilious scorn or lip-curling disgust, and all for no reason, essentially--or perhaps for the very worst of reasons: "I was here first".

At this point, there are Resident-bearing sim owners, Resident-bearing business owners, and overall, as a defined class, they add more than they take away. But it's been a harder struggle for new residents than it ever should have been, simply by virtue of the Lindens removing their choice of a last name. It set the cultural bar excruciatingly low; too low for many at first even to make the attempt to struggle under. And it's a great shame to all of us, that so many of us couldn't see past that unfortunate distinction.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I'm still waiting for evidence that Project Shining will be worth the hype.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

At the time I snapped this picture, the latest settlement involving the Lindens hadn't been announced. Looking back on it from the perspective of time, however, Rosedale's statement seems flawed and disingenuous. What we have in Second Life is real, and is ours? Hardly--as that settlement proves once again, what we have in SL is theirs, and it's as ephemeral as this exhibit will be, in a few more hours.

open atmosphere, take me anywhere

(The below photographs all come from the "Passage of Time" exhibit at SL10B in Pizzazz. Part one is here.)

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I was on the grid in September of 2006. I was working at the Enigma still--my first, and, in some ways, best job on the grid--when the hacks began. Between "grey goo" infestations, rezzed-out pose items spontaneously ceasing to work, and griefing objects in a dizzying and disorienting array, we also had the first major hacking strike to the SL servers themselves. It would not be the last.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I have heard distant (and unfounded) rumors that gambling may be making a comeback. I'm not putting any faith in them right now, but I do agree that when gambling services and virtual banks left the grid, the grid economy never really recovered. Granted, there were large (and occasionally, scarily corporatized) interests behind the gambling industry, but on the ground, all we saw was commerce easily flowing, rent being fairly effortless to pay, and a naïve sort of financial exuberance (with an accompanying naïveté as to exactly what was happening).

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

The launching of Windlight I remember most vividly by how jarringly unhappy my graphics card was with the system. At this point, three entire engines later, changing Windlight settings is as effortless as thought...but at the time, it was a terrifying, unnatural thing for me.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

It's still hard to believe that five celebrations ago, the controversial "no nipples" policy of SL5B was enacted by fiat. Of course, soon after Ursula-then-Zindra rose as the new Adult continent, and we all discovered we had bigger things to worry about.

From the transcript of Mitch Kapor's closing keynote remarks from SL5B:

So the first is, in the earliest wave of pioneers in any new disruptive platform, the marginal and the dispossessed are over represented, not the sole constituents by any means but people who feel they don't fit, who have nothing left to lose or who were impelled by some kind of dream, who may be outsiders to whatever mainstream they are coming from, all come and arrive early in disproportionate numbers.

It was the way the west in the U.S. was settled. It is the way Second Life has been settled. And in fact those early pioneers find a very arduous environment. In the early days, you really have to want to be here because life in certain ways is very very difficult, in fact too difficult for most people. It is unavoidable in some sense that there will be a very high attrition rate in the early years while a platform is being built out. It doesn't stay that way of course, it can't, but the difficulties of conditions cause those who stay to really bond together, have something in common.

And that sort of arduous frontier conditions really give these environments their charm and their character, but also their challenges [...] I think the larger prospect is bringing the value of Second Life and virtual worlds to the world at large. And to do so, it has to be opened up, it has to be made easier to use [...]

So the first thing is a much more realistic looking avatar and particularly for business meetings and meetings between people who know each other, the ability to look more like yourself when you want to, would be a positively good thing. And there are some technologies that have been developed that will create an extraordinarily realistic avatar out of a single digital photograph and a lot of algorithmic magic. These are not Second Life avatars yet, but they could be at some point.

I still find it baffling, and more than a little irritating, this insistence--from Kapor and others--that all anyone wants to do in Second Life is to log in painlessly, shop in permitted areas, and wander around looking as much like their RL selves as possible.

Don't mistake me--for those people who want to resemble their RL selves, I say more power to them. I have a friend who's done everything he can to match his RL self to his SL avatar, down to changing his in-world glasses and hair when they change. How'ver, far more of us want the creativity in SL to attach to our virtual selves as well.

Perceive it this way: I communicate one message when my RL self is in front of someone. Partially, that message is out of my control, because it rests within the viewer's internal perceptions of me or people like me. I only have my personality, my words, my body language, to communicate on my side of this interchange. Everything else rests on the perceptions of that viewer.



In SL, I can substantially increase the amount of communication on my side. Because it is my choice of presentation, my choice of avatar. Good or bad in the eyes of the viewer, these are choices I can and do make on a daily basis. As odd as many of my avatars have been (and still are), I have gone to scathingly few events where my choice of virtual appearance was wholly out of my control. In SL, what I think, what I feel, what I believe can become part of my avatar identity because of how I choose to appear on the grid--from footwear to ears and everything in between. It takes "Your World, Your Imagination" and makes it "My avatar, my identity".

While there is still perceptions on the part of any viewer that I do not control, it's far less haphazard than in RL, where I cannot as easily change hairstyle, eye color, skin color, and outfit. Which doesn't even factor in entire species shifts, or as Miss Neome is frequently seen in, avatars that are less "avatar" and far more "idealization of the perceived interior".

This is not a long-winded way of deriding people who choose to match their RL selves and their SL selves; it's a valid strategy, and for many people, it helps them adapt to virtual landscapes. But just as studies have shown that imagining a thing paves the way for that thing to happen (think studies that have proven a concrete link between disabled people visualizing walking, and subsequent physical muscle changes that would help them with the right equipment walk again), so it is with avatars. What we see ourselves as being, becomes part of our mental and emotional landscape beyond the grid; something Mitch Kapor denies at his peril.

for every questioned hour, for every second devoured

(The below photographs all come from the "Passage of Time" exhibit at SL10B in Pizzazz.)

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I will admit to being somewhat bemused as I wandered Pizzazz; I always thought it was spelled with only three Z's. Of course, at this point, maybe there's already a sim named Pizazz; who knows?

At any rate, this was a huge box on the sim, patterned with gears, with timekeeping mechanisms on all sides. I admit, it drew me in. What could be inside such a structure?

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

The simplest answer: history. But not just history; a timeline of sorts, from the very first neophyte explorations of the grid, to so-called "modern" day.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

As many problems as I have with Second Life, and how the Lindens handle Second Life, on this blog and in in-world conversation, the actual core concept I still think is fascinating. The core concept still fills me anew with wonder, even nearly seven years later.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

While there had been virtual worlds before, from text-based BBS rooms to the early MUDs, onward to the present day, Second Life was the first ostensible "game" that created a space for residents to live and work within. As it w as explained to me at the point I got involved, "It's not really a game." Whereupon my ultimate question became "So what do you do in Second Life?"

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

I've spent many years in exploration of that goal; some years better, some worse, but I think my answer still veers towards "anything"...within certain limitations. Those limitations being how far we, ourselves, are willing to expand and change to learn from our virtual environment.

(from the events album; the "Passage of Time" exhibit in Pizzazz)

When I joined Second Life, telehubs still played a large part in residential transport around the grid. It wouldn't be fully abolished (and even now, many sims still have telehubs in spite of point-to-point transference) until...what, 2008? I think? Telehubs persisted in Caledon and Winterfell longer than the rest of the grid, too.

From events

Still culling through other pictures of this exhibit, because I thought it was important enough to capture as fully as I can. But do go check it out if you have time. It's worth it.

there was nothing, but I waited, I waited

There's an update on Pteron...well...sort of. It seems they're coming back to Second Life? Maybe? Sometime next year?

In perusing various corners of the web to search for Victorian-era photographs, I ran across this link from the Syracuse University Digital Library. The (potential) down side? They're all sideshow performers of the era.

Pushing in another direction, I also found an imgur album with ten horror locales in it. If you're a horror fan, some of these will be grand fun, indeed.

(from the events album)

The intertwined winged snakes above, and the four photos below, are all from the Urantia exhibit in Astonish.

(from the events album)

How to explain Urantia to those who don't know...think...Mormons without the homophobia. Or Jehovah's Witnesses, but nicer. Essentially, they exist to spread the Urantia Book, which is purported to be a chronicle of Jesus' teachings on behalf of God, the father, to His children.

(from the events album)

Did I mention the Urantia book, the book Urantia exists to promote to every person on Earth--excuse me, "Urantia"--was written by aliens?

(from the events album)

That's what they believe, anyway. Oh, and Jesus was a white guy. They believe that too.

(from the events album)

Overall, the few Urantians I've run into have seemed nice, and at least generically non-crazy. And I hand it to whomever built their exhibit--at least by night, it was stunning, beautiful, ornate, and they even have a little celestial ride-type thingy...It's not a carousel, but it does spin, and it has some fairly cool couples' poses. So overall, I think they did a great job, and it's even more impressive at night.

And their gift for SL10B is a Urantia book designed for SL--which likely just means it's a link to one of the websites, anyway. So now you can read it physically, online, via audio book, or in Second Life. Could be worse.

(from the events album)

Boudoir, home of some of the most innovative haute couture in Second Life, made a big box. Which I was fairly ruthlessly unimpressed by, until I went in. They built a butterfly tree. A butterfly tree.

(from the events album)

And finally, Cheeky Pea, surrounded by tons of bigger, statelier builds, decided less is more. So they made a gorgeously understated meadow, with pillows and a hammock to sit on, and just admire the view. It's a great view.

And...





More from SL10B later.

crushed and filled with all I found

There's a new horror game from the creators of Slender called "Where Am I"; I lasted two minutes, but I creep out easily these days.

(from the events album)

I found a copy of the first ever Welcome Area, which was first seen on the Natoma sim, in Wonderous.

(from the events album)

The "Newbie Corral" sign amused me greatly.

(from the events album)

Miss? This is PG-rated land.

(from the events album)

Ah, well. I suppose she's mostly covered.

Then Wonderous lagged into the dust, and I lost connection. More later.

following the stream up north

Meandering for a bit, taking ports as they came in from friends, I ended up on the Beguile Sim, where there's what looks like--from the outside--a quarter-dome painted black. Once inside, though, it's a fully shielded full black dome on all sides, with a rotating, reconfiguring primset floating overhead.

(from the events album)

This was the first sight that greeted me.

(from the events album)

And then...

(from the events album)

And then...

(from the events album)

And then...

(from the events album)

And then...

(from the events album)

And then...

(from the events album)

The above art configurations are all from from Solkide Auer's build in Beguile; do check it out if you have the time to just sit and watch the magnificence rez in. It's very peaceful under the dome.

(from the events album)

Loki Eliot's cel-shaded dinosaur on Wonderous. The exhibit requires a HUD and some commitment to the experience, and being as I currently live in the land of Short Attention Span Theatre, I'm hoping I'll remember to go before SL10 ends!