toil and trouble, grief and pain, nothing ever changes, always stays the same

Stepping away from Hair Fair coverage for the nonce...

[18:06] lxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: sorry to spam but this is important
[18:06] lxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: brief notice from linden labs ,theres a group call 2nd life shop going around, giving away free ao's
[18:06] lxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: after you accept and wear ao would steal your avatar id and would take all your lindens , please becarful and dont accept this ao pass the word around to friends ty

Since I logged in, I've seen this a total of six times. It's just more rumorspam; it means nothing. And it was starting to get severely irritating.

[18:07] hxxxx Zxxx: Thats bulls***
[18:07] jxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: i saw this same message in like 4 other groups in the past 30 mins
[18:07] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: lolwat
[18:07] hxxxx Zxxx: Theres no way for an object to take linden without permission that you have to grant with a dialog message.

Seriously, there isn't. There never has been.

[18:07] ixxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: ban the spammer plz
[18:07] Emilly Orr: No no no no no no no.
[18:07] Emilly Orr: Not important, not from Linden Labs, sixth group I've seen this in today, plzstopplzplzstop.

On reflection, yes, that could easily be read as a hostile reply. I'm overstressed, overtired, and undermedicated RL, and most of those conditions are likely to continue for at least another week to full month. It's very, very easy right now for me to lash out, though--at the time this happened--I didn't see it as lashing out.

[18:07] mxxxxxx Wxxxxxx: You need to accept the message to give lindens away
[18:08] lxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: true or not at least people know now
[18:08] Emilly Orr: It doesn't MATTER what they know.
[18:08] lxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: god contraption is full of jerks
[18:08] Cxxxxx Mxxxxxx: I wish ppl would do a little research before mass spamming and raising everyones blood pressure. Aint nobody got time for that.

My thoughts exactly. And I'd said much the same thing in five other groups before this happened.

[18:08] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: if it was a message from linden labs they wouldn't need you to spread the word
[18:08] Emilly Orr: Look. The message to take Lindens from your account is ALWAYS yellow, is ALWAYS directly from Linden Labs.
[18:08] axxxxx Kxxx: agreed
[18:09] axxxxx Kxxx: bunch of nasty people. hes trying to warn people and your all treating him like crap

And okay, fine, on reflection, I acknowledge we jumped on him for this. I at least was tired, was not in the best mood to be in world in the first place, and was really, really, tired of hearing this over and over.

[18:09] cxxxxxx Lxx: Actually there is some truth to it.

Where? Point me the link that says yes, attaching an AO can, with no further drop-down warning or security request, just randomly take all your Lindens and scamper off, muahahahaha. Show me somewhere official it says that that can ever, at all, under any conditions, be true.

[18:09] Cxxxxx Mxxxxxx: Is there a secondlife snopes?

Not as far as I know. But oh, how I wish there was.

[18:09] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: people aren't jerks, it's just what you are saying is complete crap
[18:09] mxxxxxx Wxxxxxx: Its because... that old ao thing getting your lindens...
[18:09] mxxxxxx Wxxxxxx: it tires after a time
[18:09] hxxxx Zxxx: If his warnign had any factual parts to it i would.
[18:09] cxxxxx Dxxxxxxxx: Not to take sides here, but you guys should chill out.. he/she came with good intent just trying to inform others. - Besides, some are silly enough to accept permissions from items; think about how people refuse to read bright red signs. lol

I remain unsure. On the one hand, this is true, because by and large, people--all of us, at one time or another--are dumb. We do stupid things without thinking. The thing is, it's a big leap from "X hacker attacked Linden Lab and stole the credit card database file" (which did happen, several years back) to "logging in and putting on an AO can drain all your Lindens, ohNO" (which just can't happen unless you, personally, grant those permissions to the object).

[18:09] Emilly Orr: If you're not a merchant working on a vendor, and you see a yellow drop-down asking for permission to take L$ from you, just decline.
[18:10] Jxxxx Fxxxxxxx: Amen Cxxxxx
[18:10] ixxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: that message has been going around for years hes not informing anyone of anythign real
[18:10] Jxxxx Fxxxxxxx: now enough of this conversation !
[18:10] cxxxxxx Lxx: If you put on the AO, it does prompt you to click something.

And if it does, and you see that it's prompting you to click "accept permission to access your Lindens", and it's a BRIGHT YELLOW DROP-DOWN, then DECLINE. How hard is that?

[Brief insert for correction: apparently in the official V3 SL client, it's not a yellow drop-down window, it's a black drop-down window. Because all the drop-down windows are now black in the V3 client. Still, though, it has bright orange text, so that's still a separation from the norm...it's just not as obvious a separation. Which, personally, I think is a huge mistake on LL's part, but hey, it's not the first one they've made.]

[18:10] axxxxx Kxxx: ive never heard of it before and ive been on sl for years
[18:10] Emilly Orr: I think many of us have seen this many times today, and it's getting old. It's inaccurate information. No one's bothering to verify it, they're just passing it along.
[18:10] bxxxxxx Fxxx: good god! This stupid paranoia s*** has been spamming up everyone of my groups.
[18:10] sxxx Cxxxx: yes, thank's Word. I'm sure there's some less experienced reidents who finds this info useful... both the warning and the info following debunking it

And...then the chat started going sideways.

[18:11] Jxxxx Fxxxxxxx: Ok so someone tried to be nice and got jumped all over for it, That's usually the case in SL. Take what info you find here and use it or not but stop bitching about it for GOds sake .
[18:12] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: complaining is great, if everyone jsut closed everything rather then tackling it head on like a champion, everything would be boring, and people like wxxx would not learn.
[18:12] Jxxxx Fxxxxxxx: no complaining is NOT great Bxxx
[18:12] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: just shut up and get over your selves if your going to complain about a warning :V if you really think its s*** then just close the f****** chat we dont need your two cents on how stupid someoen is or something

I don't think any of us said that the initial poster was stupid.

[18:12] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: complaining is fantastic jules
[18:13] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: i should write a book about how gay all of you are for crying in some store chat about people being mean to you

It took me a minute to catch that.

[18:13] Emilly Orr: Dxxxxxx, I'm not complaining. I am doing what I can to stop the spread of misinformation.
[18:13] Jxxxx Fxxxxxxx: fixes the chat so that I only get infor from the group owner and not from anyone else here from now on
[18:13] Emilly Orr sighs. Oh, and that's all we need, a gay slur for no reason.

Because seriously, as tired as I am of hearing that spam "notice" go around, I'm ten thousand times more tired of "gay" being a catch-all "this is stupid" word.

[18:13] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: then dont get all agro about it
[18:13] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: calmly state that it may not have truth
[18:14] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: gay as in happy lady god dont get all torn up about it
[18:14] Emilly Orr: That's not how you meant it, though.
[18:14] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: how do you know ?

Because every time someone uses "gay" to mean "lame", or "bad" or "dumb", they're using the word wrong. And it is terribly pervasive, in at least American culture, in many places. Someone doesn't want to spray-paint a wall in an urban area: "Don't be a fag". Someone does something another player doesn't like in an online MMO: "dude, you're so gay". This equates "gay" as being the worst thing someone can be, and it's literally the first slang word many of us reach for, whether we want to or not, because we hear it all the goddamn time.

Example. I watch a lot of Rooster Teeth videos. They're a group of guys who never really evolved out of high school, but they have fun, and they play games I'll likely never have the consoles for, so I can watch them play and get my gaming fix that way.

But seriously, some videos, every two minutes one of the guys is saying to another of the guys that they're gay, or fags, or that they take it up the ass...it's like breathing for them, it's the culture they've been steeped in, online and off, for over a decade.

How do we fight prejudice like that? How do we fight prejudice that demeans us even in things that are supposed to be fun, relaxing, escapes from our daily stress? If it's that pervasive, to the point that we have members of our communities simultaneously saying they support gay rights, then on the other hand, call a player who shot them a faggot...what does that tell us? How can we trust the words of support if they're still using other words to tell us that we don't deserve those rights, that we aren't human enough to have them?

[18:14] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: we arnt talking about the context of how they used gay

Actually, yeah, for me at least, the conversation had very definitely moved in that direction. But I was still responding to other comments; the whole 'gay' debate hadn't yet sunk in. I'm slow when I'm stressed.

[18:14] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: you all seem very happy fighting in a pixel world
[18:14] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: rxxx didn't mean gay as in queer either.
[18:14] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: or how they are obviously trying to get your goat
[18:15] dxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: why does any of this even matter lol
[18:15] Emilly Orr: Fine, whatever, scream about AOs taking your Lindens, go have mass fun.
[18:15] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: because this is secondlife and EVERYTHING MATTERS
[18:15] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: when someonesays something is gay as an insult, they dont literally mean it is homosexual.

Yes, actually, they do. Every single damn time. That's exactly what they mean, and if you don't think so when you hear it, or if you don't think so when you do it, then, friends and neighbors, YOU ARE WRONG. Because that's what the word means. That's one more thorn in our sides, every time we hear the word used. Of course that's what they meant, because THEY CAN'T MEAN ANYTHING ELSE.

[18:15] txxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx allows her palm to become familiar with her forehead.
[18:15] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: that would be absurd
[18:15] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: and makes no sense
[18:15] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: lol
[18:16] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: no need to get so deffensive
[18:16] Emilly Orr: It's never made any sense. People still do it, though. They seem to think "gay", "faggot", "fag" and "queer" just mean "lame".
[18:16] ixxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: oh piss off you nazi bastard
[18:16] Emilly Orr: .....

I admit, at this point, I just stopped for a moment. I'd been taking pics for Hair Fair, answering chat in another screen, and suddenly, everything stopped for me. We'd started out trying to correct a spammer, and now we were gay for our efforts, and Nazis. I was in shock.

[18:16] mxxxxxx Sxxxxx: i was just saying you guys seem to be havin alot of fun thats all i need to write a book about happy people to inspire myself and others to be as happy as you are
[18:16] ixxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: oh i didnt mean nazi as in THOSE nazis
[18:16] dxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: everyone calm your tits and boners tentacles wing boners etc.

How? How are we supposed to calm down from these things? We live in a country where our technology tracks our conversations, our concerns, and our largest software firms have handed over all the keys to the intricacies of their programs, for easier access to the new Big Brother. We live in a country where stalking someone, and shooting someone, even if they were unarmed and underage, is fine as long as you're male, and white. We live in a country where hackers get more jail time than rapists, where any of us, at any time, can be declared an enemy of the state and dragged out of our homes, and taken to a place with no access to legal defense and no charges placed.

And when we dare to speak up, about the smallest of these issues, we're hit with vituperative insults--and then told we're being oversensitive when we see them for the savage imprecations they are.

[18:16] oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: words evolve
[18:16]oxxxx Rxxxxxxx: they do

While yes, they do, in this case, no. This word has not evolved. It still means what it's always meant, but people just don't care to think it through. They don't care what it says to the gay community, because--surprise!--they don't care about gay people.

But at this point, I was done. I had officially hit my stress limit for the day.

[18:16] Emilly Orr: Okay, suddenly I'm on the "you people are all jerks" side.

Not enough to leave the group, but enough for me to pretty much close the window every time it opens, or remove myself from the ability to send and receive chat. Because...maybe my skin's a little thin, today, but there's no reason for anyone to go on that heavy an attack just for me trying to stem the tide of spam. No reason.

None.