now I know you need the dark just as much as the sun (part four)

(And continuing...from part three...)

[[Note from the Editrix pre-publishing--Em has totally lost the plot and has been sitting on these last two trying to find the pics, so she is now GIVING UP and providing two pics from Radio Free Darkmere's Christmas set at the Slippy Ship.]]



While pondering the sweater-dress selections at LeiMotiv, and listening to Sunday (1994) (Yes, that does seem to be the band's name.)



Pondering yet more winter candy sets from Simply Shelby, and listening to AURORA.

I look so irritated in these last two. Ah, well. Merry Crisis after all.



Might have maybe been getting overtired...



[[And have a couple extra pictures because I was so frustrated that I lost two entire links, I forgot what I was editing for.]]

All I know is, it's been a long, dark night, but hyperfocus--plus egg nog, Firefly episodes, fig-and-pecan topped Brie and coffee--saw us to the dawn. The sun has returned for another year. Happy Solstice.

now I know you need the dark just as much as the sun (part three)

(Continued from part two!)



[[Look it's almost four am in the morning on the 24th because I wanted to get these OUT already and your Editrix is FRIGGING TIRED and somehow your Editrix's non-working brain--that's not even self-deprecation at this point, it is BROKEN and I am having to work around SO MUCH just to stand upright--where the hell was I going with this...Damn it SEE that's what I'm talking about--I THINK this was LeiMotiv but it might have been Fancy Dancer and either way I'm missing BOTH store links AND the oh-so-precious soundtrack mention and AAAAGH! I will find it tomorrow, I swear, but this is Fancy Dancer...or LeiMotiv...or somewhere else GAAAAAAH--]]





While at Pearl Fashion, saw sparkly presents and forgot why I was there (SEEE??), and started running around crystal-hunting. ALYK was playing in the background.



Pondering pretty holiday dining chairs at LouChara while The Hellfreaks play in the background.



While at BlueMoon Enterprises, picking up a festive green silk tea gown, and listening to IMPERIAL AGE. (There are also two padded, painted fabric pumpkin trio freebies out, but I don't know how long they'll be there!)



And I was trying valiantly to restrain myself at LOVE, listening to Paris Paloma.

And we lurch onto part FOUR...because REASONS...

...but before we go, listen: I know I say I love the VaeV items I've blogged, and I do, but--and I'm saying this from the perspective of it being now, when I'm typing this bit, the 25ths, I have been wearing this thing for five days. I have literally changed to six or seven saved avatars, and a couple just piecemeal-making from folders, for five days. It's big, it's heavy, it doesn't work with everything...and I do not care. I love it. I love it so much.

So if you want one of your own? Skip on over to the Warehouse Sale and find the /Vae Victis\ booth.

NOW over to part four!

now I know you need the dark just as much as the sun (part two)

(Continuing from part one.)

So I learned something tonight--the sim Madame Noir is on disallows flight. Not a huge deal, just meant I couldn't take a pic next to Grim's runed monolith. (And yes, I don't care how often Blogger tells me I meant "ruined", no--I meant "runed".)



It was fine, though. I checked the position of the giant spider--thankfully, half a field away--so this was snapped after wandering the sales wall at Madame Noir and listening to CLAN OF XYMOX. (Didn't even know they were still together, but that's a new song! Or new to me, anyway.)



While debating between mirrors at Kiu, and listening to Grace Power.

[[Could not track down the shot I took at Kiu--no idea why. So I just shifted to the first "wintery" avatar I had saved.]]



While buying the string lights at Moon Amore, and listening to Tabitha Raines.

[[Note from Editrix, pre-publication: Could not track down, for the life of me, the picture I took from Moon Amore, either. Maybe I didn't? So, quick-change to something else, flip on the halo, and go. For all that it matters, I was listening to Sub Urban's "Cradles" and Madeline Goldstein's "1996 Expectations" while lining up the shot and then editing it into frame.

[[Oh! And I should also add--this image from Moon Amore features the HUD. I have zero idea if I've shown off all the combinations. There are seven options each for the disk (barely seen in most of these shots, behind my hair). the arch (I believe that's the main portion the blades and spires link to?), the quasi-Gothic architectural star, the spikes on the inner circle that rotate, and the blades (the flat daggers that are seen behind the trio of spires). Then the spires--the typical seven options of the rest, then eight additional jewel tones.

[[If I have any complaint, it's there--I'm not able to change all the parts to vibrant colors. But this is the most minor of quibbles--there are still a dizzying number of combinations!]]



While contemplating if Gearhaven needs a giant severed bunny head at NOMAD, and listening to Snow Wife.



While checking Moonlight Shadow's...uh...forest??..horns?? Those, um...don't look like tree roots...and listening to ILUKA.

And...that brings us to another five pictures, so off to part three!

now I know you need the dark just as much as the sun (part one)

There is a touch of sadness this Solstice. Casey Chaos has passed away at the age of 59.

I don't know if that's going to ring bells for anyone. I can tell you one of my favorite songs of his last band, AMEN, was "California's Bleeding". And wandering around YouTube after I heard, I found this lovely compilation video--not just Chaos fronting for SCUM, but also a clip of Kerrang's Hall of Fame awards celebration, which had Chaos introducing the recipient that year, Iggy Pop. Dear gods, that was seventeen years ago...

So, while I'm in the middle of figuring out how I want to blog six or seven previous /Vae Victis\ products, and realizing that since Grim made the "Krampusnacht" Caged bell for MadPea's Advent calendar (that was...day fourteen? I think?), he drops yet another thing coming up for the Warehouse Sale.



But hey, guess what I found at Belle Epoque for the Saturday Sale? Janire holding the Krampusnacht Bell from MadPea's Advent calendar. (I think they were day 14? That's another thing I haven't unpacked yet...)

To wit: The "Elohim" Bladed Halo.

So, what the hell, I took it shopping.



While listening to Sub Urban and pondering the sales wall at Candy Kitten.



While checking to see if I had the hairs on sale at Doe and listening to Jax.



While perusing the sales wall of .epoch.--dangerous, dangerous store--and listening to Lilith Max.



While trying to decide between the goth elf and the pine elf at Kiu, and listening [[I am wrong! Leaving the picture as is, but that was actually Atelier, not Kiu! I blame the hazy blur of Solstice-ing, but I do apologize.]]
>br /> And since I took a lot of pictures, we'll move on to part two!

my eyes are made of acid and my tongue is sharp with spite

Because here we friggin' go AGAIN--

[3:53 PM]Soph xD: Howdy!

Feckin' NO ONE is anonymized on this one, I'm so tired, but this is @soph_2.0 on Discord.

[3:53 PM]Soph xD: Curious to ask you smth?
[4:27 PM]Emilly: What's up?
[4:31 PM]Soph xD: Actually wanted tom ask if you are anyhow interested to have any artwork done for yourself it's just i' m a small artist looking for a commission. Don't wanna bother you just trying my luck. Here's some of my previous works..

I will say this, freely--she has some skill. These are great examples of what she can do for both full-body and chibi-body Vtuber art. Not discounting that in the least.

[4:43 PM]Emilly: thunks her head against the desk
[4:43 PM]Emilly: Hold a tic, I have something for this

Because yes, I've sent this reply out to so many people it's just become cut and paste. Void stars. Why me?

[4:44 PM]Emilly: So this I started sending out in February:

[1:26 PM]Emilly: Okay, I'm just going to grab the capsule reply I gave for the first three:

Riiiight....so, @akane.illust, meet @jerry09664 and @kelly_smith (aka @Emalia?) and talk amongst yourselves. There may be a world in which blind calling works; I do not live in that world, alas. But hey, feel free to come up with targeted DMs that may get other people--other, less impoverished people--good responses! I wish you all joy of it.
[1:24 PM]Emilly: And this was March's slightly updated one:

[1:33 PM]Emilly: Okay, I'm just going to grab the capsule reply I gave for the first three:

Riiiight....so, @akane.illust, meet @jerry09664 and @kelly_smith (aka @Emalia?) and talk amongst yourselves. There may be a world in which blind calling works; I do not live in that world, alas. But hey, feel free to come up with targeted DMs that may get other people--other, less impoverished people--good responses! I wish you all joy of it.

[1:28 PM]Emilly: And that was the reply I gave @Maya_denver08. Few more and all of you can start your own design company!
[1:26 PM]Emilly: That I sent to @kazks, I believe

Like I said, this has happened before. I don't know who thinks "PLEASE I WANT TO GIVE YOU ALL THE MONIES FOR ART YOU WONDERFUL BEAN PLEASE NAO" is stamped on my forehead, but I'd bet it comes from the same corner of the internet that sends 40-year-old women who want to punch me in the face in SL, collar me so I can sniff their feet daily, and praise their nylon choices to the heavens.

(That's not even hyperbole, is the astonishing thing. It started out as 'hey wanna wrestle' IMs out of the blue, advanced to 'if you lose--which you will--I get to own you', and the last three added in they planned to collar me and have my nose perpetually near their perfect pearly toesies. Gosh thanks, ever so sorry I can't, I have to go floss the cat.)

[4:46 PM]Emilly: There might be someone else...
[5:03 PM]Emilly: There's also @stella06359, @steff_johhnson, @evalogan0088, @abby_art0, @janny_static (who helpfully included her portfolio), @aahoe17, @mia_world1, @lina_m_hodgson...I think that's everyone? There are a couple marked as "deleted_user[string of numbers]"

She hasn't replied yet. Maybe she won't. But I guaran-damn-tee you, I'm going to get more pushy little beans hopping in my inbox.

LET ME BE CRYSTAL CLEAR: I have nothing against any of these artists. I'm sure they've all done great things. I wish them joy and success in their endeavors.

Just not with me. In the past seven years, I haven't been able to even grab the coin together for a better mic, what makes them think I can afford art?

AND I'M SURE THERE WILL BE MORE but this was still in drafts when ANOTHER artist dropped into my DMs:

[1:35 PM]Lauren4: Hey there?

That was sent on December 17th, I saw it a day later.

[7:18 PM]Emilly: Hi? I know you from where?
[11:24 AM]Lauren4: Oh thats great

Handy tip: A "Have we met" answered with "Oh that's great" is nearly always going to get my hackles up. It's giving classic "I'm not reading anything you're sending back because I want to pitch my project". I figured 80/20, either another goddamn artist or a sex worker. (Again, for clarity: I have nothing against either. But I also can't afford either.)

[11:24 AM]Lauren4: Well how are you doing?
[9:57 PM]Emilly: Okaaaay.
[9:58 PM]Emilly: I would ask again, do I know you? If I have to ask again I'll just block you.

Hostile? Yes. Really not fond of the whole "Emilly means a patron" I apparently have stamped on my virtual forehead. That was on December 19th.

[3:34 PM]Lauren4: Nope
[3:34 PM]Lauren4: Now i ask again how are you doing?

Now she's confirmed not paying attention and I'm sharpening the knives. Also on December 19th, as is the reply below.

[7:03 PM]Emilly:

[11:24 AM]Lauren4: Well how are you doing?
[9:57 PM]Emilly: Okaaaay.

Thought that would've covered it.

So, let's go for blunt, then: who are you and what do you want?

[11:28 AM]Lauren4: First of all thank you for Allowing me to talk the thing is I'm an artist by profession and seeking for a emergency commission , I would really love to show you my portfolio too and rn due to the upcoming event of "CHRISTMAS" I'm running some massive discounts and offers !
[6:19 PM]Emilly: *headdesk*
[6:19 PM]Emilly: Okay, hold a tic, I have a thing for this
[6:30 PM]Emilly: Riiiight....so, @akane.illust, meet @jerry09664, @Maya_denver08, @stella06359, @steff_johhnson, @evalogan0088, @abby_art0, @janny_static, @soph_2.0, @aahoe17, @mia_world1, @lina_m_hodgson, @kazks and @kelly_smith (aka @Emalia?) and talk amongst yourselves. There may be a world in which blind calling works; I do not live in that world, alas. But hey, feel free to come up with targeted DMs that may get other people--other, less impoverished people--good responses! I wish you all joy of it.
[6:31 PM]Emilly: Y'all really need to talk to each other and figure out what works and what doesn't. I can tell you what will 95% of the time absolutely NOT work: blindly sending "hello" to a disabled person with very limited income.

Now, note: I have paid for digital art before. Everyone in my household has. We are not against digital art. That is not the point. The point is I cannot afford a bust, half-body, or whole-body full-color with additional separate expressions/hand positions to use in Twitch streaming with camera capture tied in. UNTIL I AM AT THAT POINT I'm getting really sick of always being asked.

So! If anyone IS interested in Vtuber art (or in a case of a couple folks above, any digital art, possibly even mailed prints), AND you're on Discord, PLEASE feel free to contact any of them for further details. They're all working artists, hit them up.

Just please leave me out of it. I'm tired.
[[Note from the Editrix before publishing: there's some coding errors in this one, I'm being called out to the front room, I just want to get this out tonight because there's another LONG pause of no entries, and I'm playing with the blog template again. AAAAAGH. But here you go.]]>/i>

'til you learn with age what you can’t do and then try and make a change

Eerie Aquarium's take on depression is hauntingly accurate. Some of the other conditions fit, some don't, but I get the concept. And yeah, being neurodivergent is terrifying at times. NSF...brains? Disturbing content, definitely. Touch of body horror? Mild gore. Soundtrack-induced dread?

Also, as an aside, since the last post was political, let's carry on:

Creator @bekahdayyy has put together a point-by-point refutation of anyone in your life who says they voted for Donald Trump because of their Christian faith. It's not about faith, it's about power. If you're in the position to be attending Thanksgiving, Christmas or other holidays with family and friends who voted for the orange loon, maybe print this out to answer any questions they might have.

But it's not just about the policies. Project 2025 is a comprehensive document covering many areas the writers seek to "improve". Among them:

• Defunding the Department of Education, including Pell grants for college, striking down special education programs, and taking all further education and schooling for children to pricy private (many religious) schools.
• Defunding the Affordable Care Act (also known as Obamacare, and ACA, yes, it very much IS the same thing)--which will also include Medicare and Medicaid being cut by 90%, and removing all prescription price caps (including Biden's $35 cap on insulin. Also of note: food stamps will be taken from 93% of all Americans currently involved in the program.)
• No-fault divorce will be banned nationwide, leaving many women stuck in abusive situations to be battered, severely injured, or even slain.
• Another plan that will kill women is their purported federal abortion ban, allowing zero exceptions for rape, incest, or fetal malformations and the life of the mother.
• Try this one on for size; Dismantling the Marriage Equality Act and federally ruling that marriage can only take place between a man and a woman. Women will also, under the new ruling, lose their independent rights to separate financing, owning property, or--should the unlikely divorce be granted--their own children. and let's not forget, the Marriage Equality Act also insures that interracial marriage is protected. So that will be struck down as well. Guess Clarence and Ginny Thomas are splitting up next year.
• How about the rights of workers? They won't have any. Employers will be free to break up unions, to no longer offer overtime, to fire employees for any reason without fear of repercussions. And federally, employers will no longer have to worry about displaying bigotry or racism--they'll be free to make their workplaces as white as they wish.
• The military, and likely ICE, will be deployed to enact mass deportations. Far as I understand, the procedure will be arrest first, ask questions later--if at all. And let me quote from the document directly, as she put it so well:

  "1 in every 15 families is of mixed documentation status. American citizens will be subject to deportation if they have a family member living in the home undocumented...Denaturalization of immigrants who have received citizenship will begin. DACA will end. Our Asylum Program will be dismantled."

• This is a fun one--since Homeland Security was created as a bureau, the police already were partially militarized. But after Trump takes office? Police officers will receive prosecutorial immunity and be further militarized. Checks and balances on police overreach? What are those? Oh, and racial discrimination? Prepare for that to come back, in spades, as they receive a mandate to gun after anyone not white and conservative.
• Trump, through Project 2025, will give reparation to victims of discrimination...but of course, only the white ones. The plan is also to weaponize the Department of Justice to go after teachers, professors and alumni in colleges that practice diversity, equity, and inclusion (the dreaded "DEI") and fire them. Then tear down the colleges themselves, especially black ones.

Do I need to go on? Because I can go on. This document covers the appointees Trump is planning to push through, as well, and some of them are just as reprehensible, racist and lacking any skill sets for the positions they'll be taking over, as their chosen convicted felon is.



So, for anyone still reading along who voted for Trump? This is why I'm not interested in you being part of my life. We already had four years of him, when he was basically a gleeful, wheezing toddler with a hammer, breaking structures and yelling for hamburgers. He managed to put a tidy sum of money into his pocket from YOUR from being president those four years, too, or didn't you catch that he was charging the Secret Service hundreds of thousands of dollars to rent rooms in hotels he owned?

And you voted to put him in power again. I know there will be members of Congress fighting against his despotic desires, but he has said, multiple times, to multiple Cult 45 members, in multiple cities, that at the very least he plans to:

• Destroy education as we know it from kindergarten to college
• Ban teaching ANYTHING about African-American history; Japanese histories of children growing up in camps instead of houses (even though many Japanese-Americans during WWII were born in the US); anything about the contributions people of color have made to this country through invention, innovation, scientific, medical, legal and political advances; any reference to the near-genocide and seizure of land for indigenous peoples--essentially, anything that might hurt poor white peoples' feewings
• Destroy Medicaid and Medicare (so there goes my insurance)
• Destroy Social Security (and there goes my ability to pay rent)
• Destroy the Affordable Care Act (so there goes one of my love's insurance)
• Set high tariffs against countries he currently dislikes, which will drive the cost of EVERYTHING up (or didn't you realize what tariffs actually do?)
• Destroy the Veterans' Administration entirely (so there goes my other love's insurance, since she's a veteran)
• Remove responsibility for womens' medical care and bodily autonomy (and as a woman, I kind of take that personally)
• Remove marital rights guaranteed to men from women (and this alone, even were I not happy with the loves I have, would ensure I'd never marry), essentially starting the process to make them American citizens with reduced rights;
• Restrict food stamps to the narrowest possible sliver of citizenry (so, hey, I guess I don't need to eat anymore, right?);

--and AGAIN, I COULD GO ON--



Is it sinking in yet? Having any regrets on how you voted? Because I'm hearing that a lot, too--that Trump voters "didn't really understand", or "didn't know" he was proposing to sink so many ships. And for me, I mean, great, you have seen that your cult leader may not be precisely trustworthy, but COULD YOU NOT HAVE COME TO THAT CONCLUSION BEFORE VOTING FOR HIM?!??

But that's it. End of rant. I refuse to trust people who voted for me to starve, get sicker, or outright die. Just because the price of eggs went up. Oh, babies, just WAIT until the 200% tariffs go into effect on Chinese imported goods, or Mexican imported fruits and vegetables, and you'll be having to choose between paying rent, or buying a new skirt. Paying for necessary medical equipment or prescriptions, or buying a bag of apples. No more. No. More.

the ruins of the day painted with a scar

I didn't go through a single haunt this year. It's strange to say that. I have so many things to review, and I've missed the events they were at for all of them. I regret that. And I have so many drafts I wanted to go through and post. I still might, but...there are more important things to do.



Listen. If nothing else, this has proved unequivocally that half of the United States still thinks women aren't people.

The forced-birthers won. The COVID deniers won.
The religious extremists won. The anti-vaxxers won. The anti-maskers won.
The climate-change deniers won. The prosperity gospel churches won.
The QAnon conspiracists won. The MAGAt cultists won.
The tech bros with frat-boy mentalities won. The NRA won.
The anti-feminists won. The Trump-as-Messiah worshippers won.
The neo-Nazis won.

It's morning in Gilead. This is who we are. But this is not who we have to be. I do not intend to subside quietly until the jackbooted thugs come to carry us away to the camps. I am who I am yesterday, who I am today--bisexual, Rökkatruar heathen, polyamorous--and I am not going to hide.

And if you're friends with me, or if you're one of my loves, and you voted for Trump--don't tell me. Or do, so we can break it off clean and walk away from each other. That is my line in the sand. Because if you voted for him, you voted for dozens of hate groups behind him that want to make this a theocratic dictatorship. You voted against every LGBT+ person in your life. You voted against anyone who's trans in your life, whether they've come out to you or not. And ultimately, you voted against everyone who shares my gender.

Is it sinking in yet? More women will die with a locked-in federal ban on abortive and prenatal care. Anyone who's not white has a very good chance of being attacked in the streets, arrested, deported, whether they were born here or not. Separating children from their parents at the border will likely start up again..not that it actually ever stopped, but there has at least been an attempt to reunite families post-Trump...Mandated church attendance? They could do that. I know when we were living in a very frightening small town, we were told to pick a church and go to it faithfully--because otherwise, we'd be considered Satanists and they'd shoot us.

These were cops saying that, by the way. I believe the exact quote was, "Well, ma'am, then we'll come back, help you both into a truck, drive into the scrub, and put you to sleep."

Is it sinking in yet? Trump is talking about putting a man with a partially-devoured brain in charge of women's health. Musk he's lined up for a new department, one called "Efficiency", where he'll kill any program he deems as wasting too much money. You know, like he did with Twitter--oh, sorry, I mean X--when he fired the entire coding department and suddenly, things started breaking down. Such a mystery.

He's talked about removing the FDA, the Bureau of Education, killing school lunch programs, loosening the clean-air restrictions so factories and corporations don't have to go by the keeping-people-alive programs. He says he'll fire every civil servant on the government's payroll, and replace them with his hand-picked people. He's enslaved now to special-interest churches who seriously believe that Jesus won't return until every tree is cut down. He wants no separation between church and state. The Supreme Court, formerly a panel with--at least supposedly--the most well-educated, well-versed in law, judges and lawyers...is essentially in his pocket.

And all of that is assuming he lives for the next four years. It would be so easy to be one of those "best people" close to him and just--help him to stop breathing. And then we'd have President Vance.

Trump is the first convicted felon to hold a high office. He's been convicted for fraud, embezzling, sexual assault, attempting to overturn the government...Is this really the caliber of man we want leading the country? Essentially an emotionally stunted sociopath, clearly and obviously sliding into Alzheimer's, who golfs more than Obama did, who keeps a list of people and groups that were mean to him so he can penalize them directly...this man is not presidential material.

"But oh, she supports Israel...oh, she isn't left enough...oh, it's not the time for a woman president...oh, as a prosecutor she put a lot of people of color away..." Okay. Compare and contrast--someone who might reconsider at least part of her position if enough voters asked for it, versus...Trump. Who WILL further arm Israel, who plans to cut off any future aid to Ukraine, and may in fact start shipping ammo and arms TO Russia, for all we know.

IS IT SINKING IN YET??

I'm not hiding. And echo chamber or not, I'm just porting away from anyone who starts talking about how great it's going to be under Trump again. Or bouncing people from the Gearhaven estate if I'm there. I am done with tolerating the fools who think the next four years will be anything but greater chaos than he managed during his first four years.

I don't often talk politics on this blog, because I don't want to. I left Twitter a month after Musk took over, because I could already see it becoming a haven for every right-wing nut-job still gunning for the Obamas and the Clintons for being part of the huge underground child trafficking ring...which doesn't exist, which never existed, but hey, I could pull up a double dozen articles on Republican senators, preachers and business owners who were caught doing that exact thing. May I refer you to Matt Gaetz, for example? The DOJ was told to drop the case, but the civil and criminal charges are still pending. And he's far from the only one.



But that's it. You can go home now. Everybody out of the pool.

Or go here and do some good.

NOW that's it.

and the engine's failed again, all limits of disguise

It's October already, and no haunts have been visited in September. At all. I have no explanation. Also a lack of updating, there's that. To the point that I might have to reintroduce myself to anyone reading along.

So, hi, I'm dy--I mean, I'm increasingly impair--I meant to say, hi, I'm locked in a pitched battle with my goddamn neurologis--

Errr. Let's try again. I'm Em. Hi. The rest is flavor text.

Aaaaaanyway...I had decided to do something potentially ill-advised, namely--the 21 in 31 Challenge. Now, there are existing 31 Days of Horror challenges. I know that. This felt more my speed, though.

For example, here's HordesofHorror's list:



She's following down her curated list, and even managed an explanation for each one. And I've seen both "You have to make your list on day one and stick to it!" and "Pick a movie a day you haven't seen!" camps for the usual 31 Days Challenges. I planned to fall in the middle of the road: I wasn't making a list beforehand, but I would watch each film all the way down. No five-minute "this is too terrible to continue watching" waffling.

And I'd do my best to pick things I haven't seen.

And then...several days more went by, and...here we are. So we're starting with "The Last Ghost Hunters", filmed in 2021, currently on Tubi--because it may be the only one I have energy to cover. Their capsule description says:

"Terror is about to break loose when a team of ghost hunters get hired to explore a vacant country house where several people have disappeared forever."

Okay then!



Now, I could have sworn the house used in this film was one I'd seen before, and my mind was saying Black Mirror. I checked, but as far as I can tell, it's not that. Maybe it's just similar to a lot of other houses I've seen, that were built in the same era.



So first off the bat: they do the best they can. I think all the actors did the very best they could, trapped between poorly-green-screened ghosts and the Big Evil of the piece...essentially some dude in a gas mask. There was a lot of gritting my teeth to get through the runtime.



And I'm not great at giving reviews without spoilers, so let me tell you this was the best shot I could get of the green screen, and even here, it's pretty bad. Add in special effects--smoke, fog, fire, ACTORS MOVING, whatever--and the believability sinks like a flan in a cupboard. I'm not sure, had it not been a challenge, I would have bothered to finish it, frankly.

Adding in to the "not bothering" camp: I saw Platform 2 had arrived, so I figured, I should probably try to finish the first one...and I made it twenty minutes farther in and stopped. Nope. Just couldn't do it.

Same thing with Terrifier--I liked the original anthology film that spawned Art the Clown, but not so much his segment of it. Then the first Terrifier film came out, and I tried to get through it, and...Look. I don't mind slashers. I don't mind gore. But I do have to have some greater sense of character than "woke up this morning and decided to saw into people". I don't need much of a why past that, but I do need at least that.

I even figured, hey, if I'm lost, I'll go back, but let's jump directly to Terrifier 2, since Terrifier 3 had just dropped.

Big huge nope. I just don't like the character. And this is likely the year that cements not wanting to push my brain, because...it's dealing with enough.

Is it Halloween yet?

got some feeling coming back

Well, this is going to give me nightmares. (Seriously, this is disturbing content. Not nudity, per se,, and not gore or violence, really...It's just skin-crawling, disturbing AI images. Be *warned*.)

Also, uh, hi again. I have about ten drafts waiting to be finished, that I planned to finish, and then the days ganged up on me again. Bah. If anything's not time-critical, I'll do my best to backdate, but only by a few days, not the month before, or the month before that--when I was supposed to pull my act together and toss them in as entries.

Anyway, soooo.....currently I'm at Harvest of Souls, which I still think of as a "newer" event? My brain thinks it started after SABBATH--or Ritual--but definitely not past Salem or...bah, what's the other name...I know it's not Trick or Treat Lane, because they've been around FOREEEVERRR...Gods, October's going to suck this year, EVERY event is planning on opening, it seems...



"You may ask yourself, 'Well, how did I get here?'"

Though that's not really my main question. I'm actually trying to avoid the main question, which circles around between "I haven't updated since WHEN?!?" and "If I'm going to stand around in world, by myself, for six hour stretches of time while I'm distracted to the point of getting nothing done in RL, either...am I really needed in world?" That one...I'm going to have to deal with at some point.

At some point. But not today.



"Little fish, big fish, swimming in the water..."

Today I'm at the event. I may do an entirely separate entry just walking around and capturing really fun landscaping. But I do look like I dressed for the booth, weirdly, and I hadn't seen it before porting to the event. What's actually in the booth, for sale, is /Vae Victis\' "Cernunnos" Monarch Antlers. It's now entirely redone mesh, all original work by Grimoire Hexem, and I'll get around to reviewing that hopefully soon!

[[Insert from the Editrix, sadly AFTER publishing--I am a complete FAILURE, I have forgotten how Vae Victis is spelled, oh, the horror and tragedy--but, err, the names have been fixed. My deepest apologies. When I'm more awake--the Editrixing is taking place late at night and one day forward...as is tradition...I'll check the keywords on other entries.]]

This is not going to be my usual exhaustive review. also. I know there are three places to change the color scheme, the jar itself, the trim along the jar edges, and the edges of the crack that the souls are trying, so very hard, to break through. Each can be tinted fourteen different tones, though I fully acknowledge that the booth's red light (along with the red facelight I'd forgotten I had on), means you're not getting that good a look at the options.



"I have my scars, you have yours..."

And, of course, we're only mentioning tangentially that having a migraine for a day and a half may have impaired some of my ability to brain and take pictures. Still. (This is not me asking for sympathy, either. My brain and I are not on speaking terms at the moment--it knows what it did--but that doesn't mean I'm trying to add stress and worry to anyone's plate. Yes, the Eternal Headache is still there, and why yes, the migraine was laying over it--but it doesn't matter. The headache is just that--mine.)



"Walk on water through the swamp..."

I can't even say for certain which color combos I used. My notes were scattershot. I did say this:

"The jar I'm holding, by the way, is one of the hunt prizes. Fourteen colors for the jar, fourteen for the trim, and fourteen for the broken edge that reveals trapped souls yearning to be free. Broken things can be very pretty, and this is, oh, so very pretty."

So yes, that's worth a mention. The Harvest of Souls event is having a scavenger hunt, of sorts. It requires a hud and tracking down and getting information from the residents of Hallow's End, where the Harvest of Souls can be found. Don't worry, there's only five town residents you need to talk to, and the hunt HUD is free, so why not take your chance to get hunt pretties? Including the soul jar.



"But what would you say if you were given one chance to say it?"

I remember this color set, though. This was me playing solely with hot pink and teal. Those are the vaporwave settings, apparently. And if you hadn't noticed (because I'm now noticing that in the pics, it's a bit hard to tell), this is another hand-held floaty thing. I have a soft spot for floaty things in general, and hand-held floating things specifically. So I'm overjoyed that it's their hunt prize.



"There's a red horse pawing at the door, in the hurricane of hands that I've ignored..."

So, that's the pitch. You want to see cool, innovative designs from some very cool, innovative designers? This is one of the places I'd suggest. Sure, I plan to go to Trick or Treat Lane when it opens, and of course I'm going to meander through the available October hunts...but I really liked the feel of this place. It's not "Boo, I'm a ghost, gotcha!" moments, it's not tons of blood and gore--it's, dare I say this, subtle. And comforting.



"Swallowing such sweet sorrow down..."

No, wait, I did forget one thing! Arkhive's back! Yes, Mesmer Macabre's personal brand has resurfaced, and this one hasn't gone to the bloggers yet, so I may have to count pennies. (It might not be sent my way anyway, because when Arkhive closed up, I left the group.) Either way, it is a lovely, lovely thing and I wannnts it. L$450 currently at the Harvest of Souls; likely more if you wait until it hits the mainstore!

And did I mention the antlers from /Vae Victus\ are L$500 at the event? Well, expect that in a future entry. I can say that Arkhive's spiffy staff will work with the spiffy staff AO from /Vae Victus\. Synchronicity is nice.

Now, if you'll excuse me, there's a river calling. If I catch a fallen autumn leaf, can I ride it all the way to Gearhaven? Let's find out!

running out of time, better get out or get in

So, remember forever ago, when I said I'd be following up the /Vae Victis\ geta post with the rest of the shoes...that I've still been collecting, because I am an obsessive muffin...? Anyway, yeah, that's now starting to happen, but it'll be a while before it's all graphicked up for posting.

Something else did happen, though:



Ah, right. That thing I never celebrate came up. But this year I actually received an email from the Lindens?

And, of course, to follow that:



Yeah...For some reason the email, and in particular the image above, completely kicked the stuffing out of me for three weeks. No idea why. Maybe that I found myself appalled that the "average" SL resident visits 100 regions. That's almost criminal, the grid is WIDE. Same thing with the teleports.

But the last thing, I just do not believe. There have been times I thought I logged out, and didn't, and I come back to lots of blinking IM windows. Totally my bad. But I have never, not even once, left my computer on, running, and logged in 135 days. Not. Possible.

But the bigger reason I sunk into the tarn was...761. That's the number that's been ringing in my head, and it's more advanced now than in July, when the actual rez day, and the "My Year in SL" pic, happened.

That's over two years. I've had the Eternal Headache (and that name is comically apt at this point) for over two years.

And...that...that was kind of a lot.

So I'm working on remantling, and working--harder--on accepting the Headache is now a feature, not a bug. So goes all flesh, et cetera.



But hey! The Garden's been revised in Tannhauser Gate Station! That's good news, right?



Yep. Just peachy.

everything falls out of focus, you walk through the door

So I'm frantically trying to get through as much as possible of the Shop and Hop before I fold up for the time being (and yes, I know, I KNOW, I should have been done by now!) and finally reached Aluveaux Technologies. And their gift--shown below--is a universal door plug-in:



And I got all excited. Granted, Tannhauser Gate Stations has iris doors, but still! Sounded potentially neat!



Okay! They put up a build, showing how the doors work! Though, come to think...this one doesn't seem to have doors in it...



Oh. ...Oh. Well, that's...unfortunate...

So some bugs in the system yet. Pity.