Tuesday, February 27, 2007

there's an awful lot of breathing room, but I can hardly move


Today, the demon's daughter was stalked by a somewhat seen presence. Panther, she said, but I wasn't sure. She heard paws behind her, seeing things out of the corners of her glowing eyes, and saw clawmarks on a rock she paused beside.

This is where things get odd.

It formed a rune, the clawmarks. A very specific rune. This rune, in fact:

Called Naudiz, Nied or Nauthiz, depending on translation, it's a sure sign of whitewater turbulence on its way. Many translations use "restraint" as the general descriptive, but more accurately, it's "constraint".

Restraint means simply that--the act of being bound or tied in place, the holding back, the limitation placed on self or others. Constraint, on the other hand, is a slightly different animal. There is always, always the implication of force, of enslavement, even, to ideals or goals. Subjugation of the self or others, by the self or others. Inherent repression. Caustic sense of denial.



I've spoken of whitewater turbulence; this rune says it's coming. But it also says, we're given the chance to prepare for it. Like, being given two weeks' warning on a major flood--you still may end up underwater, but you might have some time to get emergency supplies, and get away from ground zero, if you get yourself together and think things out.

Nauthiz is the crucible, the forge that can improve character, the impetus behind forcing great change, submission of spirit to will, submission of flesh to mastery. It tells you there is strength in such alteration, even though such alteration may bring destruction and misery in its wake.

It asks you, where have you limited yourself, and why? It asks you, to what goal, what god, what end have you given your power? It tells you to take it back, return to your center, heal outward.

It says, your hurt is worthless, your pain meaningless, if it does not cause you to improve. It says, have patience, know yourself, or goddamn learn over time. It says, nothing great comes without great effort, and great effort will be required to reforge your soul.

It says...consider the uses of adversity. Consider, your soul can only know light if it understands darkness. Concentrate on your shadow side, bring light and dark into balance, see what is going wrong within, and fix that. It says, patience, and wisdom, and self-understanding, will bring revelation, but constraint and caution are the bywords.

It says, ultimately...prepare yourself. 'Cause it's gonna get bad. And the universe is saying, it's gonna get worse before it gets better. And it's telling you, prepare for it NOW or be caught unawares and suffer, more than you ever imagined you could. Prepare, rethink, find your weaknesses, seek out your flaws...understand your nature...and you just might live through it.

It also says...it never appears without reason. So heed the reason, if you can listen intently enough to hear. The universe is saying, now you change. Or you fail. Live or die. Prevail or suffer.

It's saying, it's your choice.

It's saying...if you remain the same, you'll be destroyed. So learn what's made you the way you are, and remake yourself in a better image. It's saying, this may be your last chance.

...Haven't heard from the demon's daughter since. Hopefully, what little I got through helped. I won't know, I think, right away.

Current build: Spent more time developing the photography hobby again. Going to finally open a studio, I think

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