Saturday, May 12, 2012

Captain Video done went home, one pilot laid to rest

We are living in a world that its creators do not believe in. "What's the fuss all about?" they will continue to say. "It's just a different port." I mean, it's not like moving matters, it just means you're shifting to another server, right? It's not like you matter, either, right? I mean, you could still be you, in Second Life...or Ultima...or World of Warcraft...or...any other game, right?

I said that back in 2009. I still believe it. And as much as I hoped, and occasionally actually prayed, for things to improve regarding the Lindens and communication, the Lindens and faith in their own world...they haven't. The Lindens still profoundly fail at understanding the concerns of their own customers.

If it weren't so baffling, it would be absolutely tragic.

Because there were so many other ways they could have done this; yet the Lindens, again, chose the most divisive way to cause controversy in the Second Life community they could. Because remember: server. And place. They don't see the community we see, they see a bunch of game players, a bunch of customers of their product.

We see the communities we form. We see the bonds of family, friendship, love and business. We see the support people can provide for each other, and the world at large.

I said that in March of 2009, and I still don't think that's changed, three years later.

(from the media album)

Oh look! It's another Evon--wait, no, it's not. It's something called Call of Roma, and it's already getting heat because of the tacky advertising campaign.

But wait! It gets better! This is their sign-in screen:

(from the media album)

Yeah, makes you want to sing, doesn't it? Or hurt people. Sing or hurt people.

But hold on, the stupid doesn't stop there. Here's the tutorial wench:

(from the media album)

Granted, a 400 pixel presentation just won't make the text clear, but I thought this was important enough to help with that. This is what she's saying:
My noble lord, welcome to the world of Caesary! I'm Hypatia of AEgyptus, head of the Platonist school at Alexandria in 400 AD Roman Egypt. As a philosophy scholar and a teacher of all things, in the next 2-3 minutes, I'll walk you through a few basic steps on how to properly build and manage your own city. By following this simple yet powerful tutorial, you get a perfect start! Let the adventure begin!
Yep. Let's just count the inerrancies:

  • That dress 
  • That cleavage 
  • The fact that she's assuming every player of this game will be male
  • The way her lips are shiny and suggestively parted 
  • The fact that the damned world is called Caesary, yet the game is called Call of Roma 
  • The fact that she says she's from "400 AD Roman Egypt", instead of something more natural to her time
  • That she claims to be a "teacher of all things" 
  • That she claims to be a philosophy teacher beyond that 
  • That, after claiming to be a philosophy and everything instructor, she's limited to instructing people in a game tutorial 

Am I being too picky? I don't think so:

(from the media album)

Now we've moved up to "Click here for sex". Perfect.

I rest my case.

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