No, please, not the big pleading eyes, what do you want, what's wrong, let me fix it, oh gods...
Also, why does this exist? More to the point, why did it sell out??
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
[20:11] Cxxxxxxxxxx Axxxx: There can be only one.
And from the amusing to the disturbing...
[12:58] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: oooooh deys wots and wots of groupie gifties hewe too. dis pwace has tons of fweebies. wucky chaiws MM boards
Let me interject before we reach the reaction portion of this conversation. This is part of the group chat from the SL Frees & Offers group. It's something I've been involved with for a few months for two reasons--the amazing wealth of information on free offers on the grid, and the sheer tonnage of designers who release monthly gifts for the group.
So this was just another day of various denizens noting various offers they'd found that day...until this.
[13:00] Axxxxx Sxxxxxxxx: No breedable places please Sxxxxx
[13:00] Qxxxxx Pxxxxx: its not really
[13:00] Qxxxxx Pxxxxx: i mean kinda
You mean, actually yes, it is a breedable place, and a mall, and this group has rules. No breedable stores, no malls, no Adult lands, no casinos or gaming palaces. There's a few specifically banned stores--I haven't learned them yet, but I've never posted things from any of them, because I've never been corrected on any stores I've posted. I do know that most of the banned stores were banned because their owners wouldn't stop spamming the group with notices about full-price, not-on-sale, not-free items.
[13:01] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: is a stowa at a sim someone dave me fowa free xmas tree gifties
And, as I've pointed out before--and as some are going to point out soon--I really, really loathe this particular affectation, especially since I have met child avatars who choose not to cripple themselves with this ridiculous, stunted pidgin-speak.
[13:02] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: i no give people bweedable stuff, just stowa and pwetty xmas twees giggles
You are entirely missing the point, you dimwit. You are NOT ALLOWED to post that store in this chat. So don't keep talking about it.
[13:03] Pxxxxxx Lxxxxxx: that is so annoying
[13:03] sxxx sxxxxx: What is Pxxxxxx ?
[13:04] Pxxxxxx Lxxxxxx: people who put w's instead of r's
Yes, yes it is. Profoundly.
[13:04] Rxxxxx Sxxxxxxxxx: shes a ting little girl
[13:04] Rxxxxx Sxxxxxxxxx: tiny too
[13:04] axxxxx Sxxxxxxxx: She's a child avatar Pxxxxxx, she's going to talk like that
Why? Why is she going to talk like that? What inane demilinguist made the decision that this is how child avatars talk on the grid? How far does this inanity go back? Because, between the inappropriate offers, the pride over griefing attempts, and this, there are solid reasons why many residents of the grid dislike child avatars.
[13:04] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: where does a tid find kiddie stuffs? pweet pwease?
[13:05] rxxxxx jxxxxx: thats cwazy :D
[13:05] Rxxxxx Sxxxxxxxxx: right !!
[13:05] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: mmmhmm dis hows i talks
[13:05] lxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: its role play
[13:06] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxxx: but if someone was roleplaying cusswords or something else annoying or offensive they would get the boot i bet.
[13:06] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: mmhmm dey is, i gets them and bwing my mommie hewe.
Dear gods, no, please, not that. The woman who tolerates your chosen speech impediment is not someone I ever want to meet.
[13:06] Axxxxx Sxxxxxxxx: Look, that place isn't allowed to be posted...
[13:06] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: dey on da walls, is slinky nails and over nails, sooo pwetty too
Are you actually mentally impaired, and not just lacking all imagination? She's told you more than once to stop posting that store, which also includes continuing to talk about it, so "shut the hell up" is actually appropriate to say here.
[13:06] pxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Actually... children don't actually talk like that.
It's true. Yes, children invent their own pronunciations; yes, children lisp--in fact, when I was growing up, I was a child who lisped. Lisping does not equal this kind of pidgin idiocy. Only "adults"--and I use the term loosely--come up with this as how "real kids talk". Which tells me two things: they don't spend time around many "real kids", or they just don't care because they think it's twee and "kyooot".
[13:06] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: we couldnt find them beyond the group ones - its not a big deal, it was funny what was said to me thats all.
[13:07] pxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: If they do, they're normally taken to the doctor to see if they're retarded or not
[13:07] rxxxxxxxxxx Gxxxxxx:
[13:07] rxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: LOL
[13:07] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxxx: exactly Sxxxxxx
[13:07] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxx: Thats Not Nice Rxxxx
Sometimes "not nice" is just "being honest" because "they won't listen any other way" because "they're dim".
[13:07] Sxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Well I think she's absolutely amazing.. because my kids couldn't type full sentences on a pc at 2
Yeah, we're not talking about typing, here. We're talking about child avatars who continually try to portray the dumbest thing in the room. It's not funny, it's not accurate, it's not necessary and it's not endurable. Find another goddamn hobby other than irritating everyone around you.
[13:07] Rxxxxx Sxxxxxxxxx: ok lets just drop the subject please unles you find it stimulating to hurt anothers feelings
Well, on occasion...But I've mostly grown out of that phase. And see? Look how adult I'm being--I'm not even dissecting this chat for grammar violations.
[13:07] Qxxxxx Pxxxxx: wow
[13:07] pxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Just being realistic here, that's all
[13:08] pxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Speech impediment is serious, yanno?
It is, assuredly. This isn't that. Someone with a genuine speech impairment usually doesn't need to point it out, it's obvious. Someone with a social impediment--like some forms of autism--will usually point it out in world, or, if they don't, it's also usually not difficult to pick up, so we may react accordingly. This isn't either of those things. This is like Baby Jane's character in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane--someone who put so much time and energy into being young and adorable that, well past fifty, she's still trying to be young and adorable. And, because she is, at this point, old and psychotic, it doesn't work.
Much as this form of speech in child avatars does not work.
[13:08] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: das not nices at aww you all
[13:08] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxxx: not the retarded part but...
[13:08] Qxxxxx Pxxxxx: cause SL is realistic.......
Of course it's not. But there are rules. Many of them are unspoken, because they simply don't need to be--things like, don't show up nude in a PG sim, don't show up non-human on sims that only allow human avatars only, don't show up erect in any public area unless it's explicitly stated that that's okay (and nude beaches don't count, boys, they'll let you in naked and flaccid, but not naked and erect).
But this isn't about that. This is about something so irritating that it crosses the expected boundary points. The furry community has their own form of this irritation, called "babyfurs". While there are some babyfurs that aren't attached to creepily pedophilic sorts, the vast majority--and those who seek them out--just...are. So there are a lot of furry sims where there are explicit signboards saying "no babyfurs allowed". Because the drama that is them and the drama that follows them is just too much drama to deal with.
Come to think of it, there's more than a few sims and stores now that don't allow child avatars anymore, either, and not just those who operate on Adult land. That's interesting, isn't it?
[13:08] Rxxxxx Sxxxxxxxxx: and i know that but i was brought up better than to cause hurt to others
[13:08] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxx: And You Admin's Is Gonna Tollerate This
Funnily enough, yes--none of the mods came forward to censor anyone at this point.
[13:11] pxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: Wasn't trying to hurt anybody's feeling, just bringing up facts.
[13:11] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxxx: i didn't mean to hurt anyone's feelings I apologize - I was just agreeing that it was a little jarring. I'm not used to ppl roleplaying in a group chat like this.
[13:11] Axxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: And she's shorter than me in SL, so I like her already lol
[13:08] Rxxxxxx Bxxxxxxxxx: i don't see any kid avatars in here saying how you should do your SL...
In here, at this exact moment, no, you don't. In other chats at other times, yes, I've been present for those conversations, and they're always jarring and distasteful. So it does happen.
[13:09] Axxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: ok, people please be restpectful each other
[13:09] lxxxxxx Oxxxxxxx: Its Ok Skyler They are Just Trying to Be Mean To Make Their Self Feel Better
[13:10] sxxxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: is otay, peoples no huwt my feewings. i is a kiddie so i know hows to taddle teslls betta dan anyones
...And...why, precisely, does harmful commentary lead to "tattling" in your mind, O unholy child? What do you honestly expect that to do? Tell your mommy, and she'll do...what, exactly? What kind of power do you expect her to wield, here?
[13:10] Axxxxxxxxxxxx Rxxxxxxx: awwww, Skylar is so cute
[13:10] Emilly Orr: Or, some of us have had bad experiences with child avs in the past, though not all of us are hostile about it. At any rate, it's a varied group, just don't engage if it bothers you.
Or, when it still bothers you, bitch about it later on your blog. That happens, too.
[13:10] rxxx Rxxxxxxx: wait
[13:10] Pxxxxxx Lxxxxxx: ok, back to the freebies, not adults pretending to be children, ..does anyone know where the analog dog free hair is located, I'm at point B
And onward we went--thankfully childspeak-free past this point.
Finally, a Linden-based comment from another chat:
[15:39] Txxxx Rxxxxxxx:: [Posted 3:20 PM PST, 17 December 2014] In October, we discovered an issue regarding the Second Life Wiki that required maintenance to resolve. This maintenance is currently ongoing. During this ongoing maintenance, the wiki remains available in read-only mode. At this time, we do not have an estimate as to when the maintenance will be completed, however, please be advised that the maintenance is proceeding and is of a high priority. We’ll post as soon as the maintenance is completed, and thank you for your patience.
[15:40] Txxxx Rxxxxxxx: so they've been doing that maint since october
[15:40] Kxxx Hxxxxxx: good job they are working fast then
[15:41] Txxxx Ixxxx: sounds typical for LL
Yep. Pretty much.