Wednesday, January 21, 2009

you're so easy to read, but the book is boring me

I'm still being baffled, reading various snippets on the Babbage Ning. Threads like this one just confuse the hell out of me:
You knew what you were doing when you signed up, and there has been a very clear campaign of biased moderation on the Ning in which I am lectured if a mod thinks I might've even pretended to have 'uncivil' thoughts (i.e., daring to point out a flaw in an idea/statement) much less defend myself from slander, and in which I have been blatantly attacked unprovoked repeatedly, and the mods turn a blind eye.
Huh. Maybe I need to break some of the terminology down, then.

Uncivil: adjective Impolite, discourteous, rude; lacking civility or good manners: "want nothing from you but to get away from your uncivil tongue" (Willa Cather)

Civil: adjective Polite, courteous, not rude; marked by satisfactory (or especially minimal) adherence to social usages and sufficient but not noteworthy consideration for others; "even if he didn't like them he should have been civil" (W.S. Maugham)

Miss Commons tosses out phrases like "There is nothing offensive about my posting" and "they can put on their big girl panties and deal with it"...without ever once seeming to really understand how alarmingly uncouth, rude and uncivil she's really sounding like, in these many, many comments.

Other "sentiments" Miss Commons seems fond of using:
"Calling someone a liar isn't automatically a personal comment..."
Actually, for many it is. Being informed that one thinks someone else lies directly (as opposed to perhaps stretches the truth a bit, or might not understand all the nuances of X situation, for instance) is considered by some to be a very personal attack, equivalent to slapping their chosen spouse in public for no reason, or stabbing a child, or kicking a beloved pet. How anyone could think that it's not "automatically a personal comment" is beyond me.
"Please, keep making wild and incredibly retarded accusations."
Yes, indeed, because the phrase incredibly retarded is obviously chosen to foster intelligent thinking discourse with opponents. Of course, one is always at their most rational when incredibly retarded is typed as a description for anything.
"People read intent and tone into text where it doesn't belong."
This is the really interesting bit--and she makes this point again and again, whether we want to hear it from her or not: that she, herself, is completely, mentally, emotionally, and psychologically level when she writes these inflammatory accusations against character and commitment, so of course it's all us out to get her, and read into her plain and unadorned words the heated dramatics of the last month in New Babbage.

Right. "[P]ut [your] big girl panties on". That's rational. Calling comments by others "little tantrum[s]". Right, perfectly rational. Then naming anyone else who disagrees with her "hypocritical" for doing so. When does it end?

Maybe it ends here, with a moment of possible truth and honesty:
"I'm the antichrist, really."
Yes, I know, I do know she's being sarcastic here...but hey, if the sabot fits...

She's terrorized Caledon to a standstill. She seems to have done the same thing to New Babbage. What's next, New Toulouse? What's left of Antiquity? Steelhead? The mainland?

Ooh, actually, I'd be in favor of that last one. Several sections of the mainland really need to have Miss Commons inflicted upon them. It'd teach them to shape up and stop being so idiotic on their own.

19 comments:

Darien Mason said...

I say let her have her own little sim that she can dither over and call "Teh ZOMG Most Perfectest Pony Bunneh Kitteh Sim in teh W0rld1!1!ELEVEN"

So we can nuke it.

Icterus Dagger said...

I'm morbidly curious... terrorized Caledon to a standstill?

Dr. Mason: Even with what evidence you and Miss Orr have as to Ms. Commons's actions and motivations, I suggest restraint in comments such as yours, above.

Miss Orr: I have to admit that not having the complete context hurts my understanding of this issue; however, I have to say that from what you posted, although Miss Commons' remarks are not the most polite, I am not seeing them as terribly inflammatory. In fact from the bulk of what you've posted, it DOES look like she's being taken to task for dissenting views (however uncivil they might have been stated). Perhaps it reads differently to you, as you are so close to this specific issue?

I have to agree that it IS a big deal if people don't care what they say compared to how they say it. But again, I must be missing important context. No need to explain, really. You know how I feel about issues such as these.

More important to me, is that in some of your last posts and comments, you imply that what's gone on regarding Caledon and Caledon chat is somehow your fault, or that you made it worse? I strenuously disagree. Those issues NEED(ed) to be talked about. The fact that, as a "nation", Caledon doesn't give a fig is hardly your cross to bear.

-iD

Emilly Orr said...

Dr. Mason: Okay, that earned a snicker. But no, I wouldn't suggest nuking her sim, should she get one, because that would just exacerbate the problem.

Ideally, I'd like her to actually realize she uses such divisive language, and thus understand why people become upset with her--but this may be beyond her current ability set to understand. Which is part of the tragedy, I would suppose.

Emilly Orr said...

Mr. Dagger: Well, while I do claim partial responsibility for what happened, as I was one of the main instigators, I'm certainly not saying that I was wrong in wanting to address the wrongs in ISC chat, and in the decline of personal manners in Caledon as a whole. I am maintaining that how, in this case, is as important as what and why--that, barring the direct accusations to Mr. Seerius Hax, I could have made my point without such stern divisiveness, by pointing at overall problematic behavior, and not specific problems on behalf of specific individuals.

As far as Miss Commons herself, what occurred in Caledon might have happened whilst you were away: namely, in simple terms, she flew over to Winterfell, after the Winterfell sims joined the Realm of the Roses, flew into territory guarded by a security orb (allowed in Winterfell, not allowed in Caledon), and was promptly sent home.

She was not set ablaze; she was not violated by maniacal jackbooted thugs intent on rapine; she was not orbited and forced off the grid. She was simply warned, and then teleported home.

But after this one--and it was one, singular incident, not plural ones--she spent the next three weeks, in and out of Caledon Chat, accusing Des of collaborating with mainland influences, complaining loudly and at length that Winterfell, being savage and impolite, could not be trusted and would drag us all into using security orbs ourselves (regardless that such are explicitly disallowed by covenant in Caledon), and using three- and four-syllable curse words to make her many and varying points.

Am I, perhaps, taking her to task without cause? Had I not suffered through her childish tantrums, detestable tirades peppered with rank language, and the more than two weeks thereafter she threatened Caledon--and Des--with leaving (to the point that well over half of us began encouraging her, whenever she surfaced, to leave, as politely and firmly as we could), I might agree that at least half of what she's said in the Babbage forums could well be seen as a concerned citizen wanting what's best for her chosen lands.

But that still leaves the other half. And it leaves my personal history with her, which has painted her by her own behavior as a vicious trumpeter of inaccuracies, who would rather attack first, and complain of mistreatment after; who would rather scream, yell, and curse than politely debate, or even disagree; who is, in person, by IM, and in chat one of the single most disagreeable people I've ever known on Second Life.

I know she has friends. I know at least one of her friends is someone I esteem as a paragon of Caledonian society, and an excellent judge of character besides. Thus, there must be something to Miss Commons behind the braggadocio, the stentorian offensiveness, and the noisome profanity she peppers many of her arguments with.

How'ver, having said that, I am unmistakeably left with that history of ridiculous complaint without cause, and profane malediction over polite converse, and my conclusion is unmistakeably that, having made herself at one point the single most hated individual in Caledon, she seems determined to win that accolate again in Babbage.

If I'm wrong, I'm more than willing to hear why. But she is certainly, at the very least, making an already difficult situation even more troublesome, by her vilifying of mayoral candidates and her fellow citizenry alike.

Icterus Dagger said...

Thank you for the further explanation, Miss Orr.

The antichrist comment got a smirk from me, by the way, given my chosen part-time RP in Caledon.

I suppose such dramas are inevitable in this Second Life as in the First.

*sighs melodramatically* ;-)

-iD

Emilly Orr said...

Melodrama invariably occurs. I view it as part and parcel of what I call the 'speed factor'.

In RL, say, I can meet someone, talk to them, go to coffee with them, date them, and all this will spin out over weeks, maybe months. From first meeting to discovering love: say, on average, six months. Or perhaps longer.

Online, I can meet someone, we can send emails back and forth, play games together, mayhap even call each other--and the speed factor's higher, it can be two weeks to two months, with the average being thirty days.

In SL the factor's very high: from first meeting to engagements--and I've actually seen this, with friends--can be seventy-two hours or less. From first meeting, to love, to marriage, to divorce--two months is the average.

So the amateur dramatics heating up and blowing over--it happens, all the time, every single day. SL is life on speed, life in fast forward, life intensely lived: I think we all know this. So arguments are stronger, pain lasts longer, harsh words cut deeper.

On the plus side, joy is richer, love is intensely true...at least, until it goes away. All part of life on speed.

As far as it goes, the antichrist comment made me grin, too, because--RL--that was an appellation handed to me several years back, during another series of arguments.

Gabrielle Riel said...

"She's terrorized Caledon to a standstill. She seems to have done the same thing to New Babbage. What's next, New Toulouse? What's left of Antiquity? Steelhead? The mainland?"

Ah...I can give at least one answer here, in regards to New Toulouse.

That would be a big old NO.

:-)

Emilly Orr said...

Oh, good. I'm very glad to hear this.

*smiles*

Baron K. Wulfenbach said...

Fraulein Orr,

I think it's equally safe to say the same about Steelhead.

Antiquity has too little to attract her, thankfully, although trying the Grand Duke's temper would be imprudent as well.

Now... Rivet Town. Hmm.

Yrs.,

Klaus Wulfenbach

Emilly Orr said...

You know, I still haven't actually *been* to Rivet Town, or Steeltopia, for that matter. I should visit.

Fuzzball Ortega said...

I've been to Rivet Town once....rules they have didn't appeal to me (the werewolves are to be acted in the stereotypical way). As for STeeltopia....it's not bad, considering SteelCobra made Jobias Barthelmess an ambassador of Steeltopia.

And as for your wondering about it happening in Steelhead. Trust me...it won't.

Emilly Orr said...

I trust you implicitly, Sheriff. Because above all other considerations, Steelhead has two things going for that small but growing group of sims that many other places on the grid do not have:

1. A dedicated staff of hard-working managers and public servants who (along with Miss Kattryn) ensure that things continue to function relatively smoothly, as often as they can; and

2. A group of people who also self-police fairly well, who will either resolve conflicts, or leave if the conflicts can't be resolved.

This cannot be said about most other sims on the grid; it is most laudable when it is found.

Sphynx Soleil said...

I checked out Rivet Town one late insomniac night and yes, it does appear to be a heavy RP area - with restrictions on what avatars they want to see, based on their RP world.

Emilly Orr said...

Hmm. Human/construct only, I'm assuming?

Sphynx Soleil said...

I'm not entirely sure about construct, but definitely human. It wasn't entirely friendly as it did not appear to have a "observer" status allowance, as most other RP sims do - I felt I had to shift to something more mundanely normal as opposed to my current, if that gives you any idea...

Emilly Orr said...

Yes, and not an overwhelmingly positive one, all things considered. Hmm. Rivet Town's definitely pulling in last on the 'sims to check' list now...

Sphynx Soleil said...

Steeltopica, on the other hand, is MUCH more welcoming. Definitely worth a visit. :)

Eugenia Burton said...

*cracks open the double-barreled shotgun and slides in two shells* The Sheriff is right - she's not coming to Steelhead. I've got 'Rabbit Season' signs ready to go.

Emilly Orr said...

Sphynx: When next I have time, then. Might prove instructive at the least.

Miss Burton: I have eminent faith in your aim, as well. Let's hope such plans won't be necessary; now that the rabbit has blooded her claws, she may calm down once more.